23 Aug '11, 6am
The bikini incident
So, I did the stupidest thing you could imagine. More accurately, I didn’t bring my swimsuits with me to Mallorca, after all that fuss shopping for a bikini, leading to the craziest purchase of my life — FOUR pairs of bikinis. It’s crazy because I don’t even like wearing swimsuits to begin with, never mind bikinis, because, to grossly understate it, I don’t look so hot in them. Of course, what’s more crazy is that, after all that , I am now lounging on the island of my two-week resort holiday while my new bikinis are lounging in my wardrobe in Bournemouth. I would say this is the biggest loser story of my life but I think it’s more likely a sign. Swimsuits and bikinis are not for me. In case you’re interested, I didn’t bring them because my wardrobe had run out of space so I had stored them in Piers’ wardrobe. They’d been sitting there untouched for about three weeks, wait...