It is one of those nights again. I am painfully aware of everything, my thoughts, my twitching muscle below the left calf, the slight jogging ache in the right thigh, the pressing pressure on the temple, a tiny bead of sweat forming at the back of the neck, a nervous pinch in my molar, the crackling of the malt which only serves to heighten the awareness, my unquenchable thirsts, the humming