Confession of the day.. 今日的忏悔..Everywhere I go, everyday on the newspapers there is at least an article on making more babies. I am sure we have heard enough of Singaporean's point of view after PM Lee delivered his National Day speech on Singaporeans delaying marriage, not having babies etc.After all sorts of nation wide suggestions on the cause of the problem, it suddenly became every young/fertile Singaporean's fault because the conclusion is we are not willing to get married and have kids!I'll like to say, if using money to solve the problem of falling birth rate isn't helping, then money isn't really the root of the problem. As a Singaporean, I am worried. Therefore I shall discuss the problem and give some suggestions from my humble point of view in three different posts.Problems cited : Rising costs, help in looking after children, work and maternity/paternity leave.Assuming I am married and I am going to make some babies/ already have babies of my own:Rising costs is everywhere and it is not going to stop. What didn't rise is our pay and that is not going to happen. Unless we can grow more land, grow more crops (I don't mean organic) on our own, have our natural resources, take ERP away, take away GST, we will still feel the pinch and attribute this as a contributing factor.Yes, we may save more and hold on to a little more cash. The question is, are we ready to reproduce like nobody's business if all the above mentioned is taken away?Your guess is as good as mine. Money isn't really the problem.If I already have a kid, I would need help in looking after my little brat when I am at work (since I have to work because of our small population). Getting a maid may solve the problem (if I can afford one).Plus, all those reports and videos on maids kicking, punching and throwing children down the window.. If I have to spend 9 months carrying my flesh and blood in me, natural or Cesarean birth will be painful and of course numerous stretch marks after giving birth, any normal women would not want to put her children at such risk. Getting a domestic helper is not going to solve the problem for the "help" I need.We may argue that not all maids are abusive and for all we know, it may be the employer who provoked the maid. Whatever the reason is, a women would rather look after her own children rather than someone else unless absolute necessary. In short, we don't trust maids. Money isn't really the problem. Fear is.If we have to leave the job to someone else, it got to be someone we trust like my own parents.It will be great if our parents can look after our children, but what if they are not available? They may not be willing, they may not be healthy and they may not even be around. Our parents are not obligated to look after our kids.If money can solve the problem, may I suggest giving cash incentives to people looking after their grandchildren?Women in Singapore are fortunate. We make up almost half of our workforce. There is no social stigma on working women who are married and married women with kids. We are able to work because we are equipped with skills, knowledge because we are given education just like the guys. We were engineered to work and having a baby isn't going to change that.We are as educated, received higher and maybe even better education. Our parents didn't pay half the price for our education and we spent the same amout of time, money and effort to get our qualifications. Do you expect us to stay at home and breed? That really isn't possible!You may argue that women are not expected to stay at home after giving birth now, but it brings back the problem of help in looking after childen again.The thing is, if I spent so much time and effort to climb up the corporate ladder, I don't think I am willing to throw/put that away even after having a kid.I may have one or two children, stay at home, look after my kids and maybe have more kids if my husband can afford it. At the end of they day, I will not want to be too dependent on someone else and that includes my other half.In this world, we know nothing is guaranteed. He may leave me for someone else and if that happens, at least I know I won't fall so hard...So, maternity leave is extended to 4 months for females while it is not feasible to grant a month of paternity leave because males still dominate the top management, hence earning more. Good thing is, if I ever have a child, my employer got to pay me for the next 4 months but what happens after that? The problems cited above will resurface.I would like to remind everybody that it is not possible for a women to have a baby alone. Masturbation don't lead to pregnancy. Men are not the only ones contributing to the household expenses now. We don't exclude women from the workforce and I don't think it is fair to exclude men from a month of "mandatory" child duties. Earning more is not an excuse.If I am going to have a child for the first time, I am inexperienced and my husband is not there to lend me his support. For all I know, I may even get post-natal depression! I'm sorry to say I will stop at one. Money isn't really the problem, support is.If we're going to use money to entice fellow Singaporeans in having more babies, we might as well use more to solve it. Don't give one off Baby Bonus. Give child bonus until a certain age instead. It'll be more attractive compared to a one time payment.Hey, if you still think money is the problem, at least you don't have to worry for the next few years to come... I still think money isn't really the problem to be blamed for falling birth rates.