just a thought it’s somehow harder to imagine your female friends having sex as compared to your male friends, no?   /edit:  i’m asking that question from the standpoint of a female. perhaps i should rephrase my question.  for females, it’s harder to imagine your female counterparts having sex. for males, it’s harder to imagine your male counterparts sowing their seeds.   now tell me if this is true. (and boyfriend, you can try commenting again. )   /edit.  conversation because i was experiencing some sort of phenomena when conversing with guys lately, i decided to consult mr. wisecrack on this matter.   note: please take note of the timing of the conversation.     there was this weird pause of about 10 minutes where he didn’t reply, and i thought perhaps he was busy, (since he changed his status to busy) so i declared my intention to go take a bath while waiting for his answer.         it’s just so like him to do this sort of rubbishy thing, and yet, it’s silly enough to make me laugh.   weird friends i’ve got.     gams and the things you walk them in. my gojane shoes have arrived!   i bought patent gladiator sandals, as well as gladiator heels.   my sister modelling the patent gladiator sandals.    they’re really tough to put on cause of all the buckles and straps.  oh, but for the sake of vainity!   and this is me in my gladiator heels.     they’re a killer to wear.   here’s the obligatory leggy picture.     yes i have a pink wadrobe cause the folks typically believe that girls=pink and boys=blue. so yes, my brothers’ wadrobe’s blue.     now i’m just waiting for the long overdue pay to come in so i can get more shoes! and clothes! and accessories!   ahhh.. to live the life of a woman.   question are you contented with life?   and why?   me and sex? doesn’t *cough* fit leh. *edited* it all started from this meme on thiang’s blog. this was how it went:      i left her a comment, and this was her reply:     it seems like her impression of me is that of someone who’s really into sex.    it’s either that, or that i get alot of sex.   *gives a thoughtful look*   then it was plurk.     still plurk.      yet another plurk.       and another.     keep counting …     how many has it been already?     and so i decided, since they want to associate me with sex, i’ll just do as they wish!          and i came up with this:     and this.        so all that was last week.   since then, i’ve been laying off plurk cause i was far too busy with work and school.   then i spotted this on thiang’s blog today.     and i decided to try it out as well, just to prove to everyone that me equivalent  to sex.         shit.    i shall now wait for the boyfriend to put in a good word for me.       - - - - - - - - - /edit   while on messenger with the boyfriend:     i’m so not going into what the "that" in "and then after that food" means, but all i can say is, the boyfriend is really good at dirty-talking.   talk about adding oil to the fire. heh.         as quoted from one of his smses. "although it was your boobs that first attracted me, it’s you i love".     very comforting, boyfriend.   eileen, you stupid whiny kid eileen, shut up about your work already.   nobody wants to hear how you’ll be spending 1 month over at the dreaded PR side, then the second 1 and a half month over at the creative side, just because you were too soft-hearted to turn your woeful, puppy-dog eyed supervisor down.   nobody wants to hear how you suspect you’ll be doing alot more work than what you’re assigned to do, because the person you’ll be working with isn’t exactly all miss hardworking.   nobody wants to hear you go on and on about how you miss reading the papers everyday without having to keep an eye out for any coverage on the clients.   nobody wants to hear you.    not even yourself.         of queer taxi drivers and two months in heaven. i hopped into a cab after dinner at the boyfriend’s place.   cabbie: "wah, he live in sengkang and you live in jurong west, so far."   *thinks to self* "this is so gonna be a long cab ride".     *after cabbie finds out i’m 19 and the boyfriend’s 30*   "wah! so old ah! but good lah, they say older men will always love their young girlfriends alot. somemore, you’re pretty! so, got alot not?"    "er, okay lah."   "sure got one lah. so, how many boyfriends have you got so far?"   *after finding out i had 4, exclaiming his surprise, and asking how long each one lasted,*   "so, the third one, 2 years long relationship. got give everything to him anot?"  *looks around uncomfortably*"no". (note, my answer to this sort of question varies from occasion to occasion, and person to person)   "wah! good ah! ya lah, also good. don’t give better. but aiyah, i know men. they will always want. so ya lor, if you love the guy, then give lor. but better use protection. then this current one, got give everything?"   "no". (note, see above note)   "really anot? you can tell uncle one. no need to be shy."   i insist on my answer.   "ah. then you all go paktor, who pay? he or you? then got give you allowance every month?"   "sometimes he pays. sometimes i pay. no lah, we don’t calculate these sort of things."   "how can! i tell you ah, you must let the guy pay!"   "no lah. i earn my own keep, i can pay for myself."    "no lah, you’re wrong. that’s where you’re wrong. let uncle tell you. he’s the guy, he won’t be at a disadvantage. so if you give him "stuff", you must make sure he pays lah."   *rolls eyes at his warped theory*  "no lah, i still think i should spend only the money i earn for myself."   he then tries to force upon me his reasoning, and at this moment in time, i promptly "fell asleep".   geez, taxi drivers these days.   too kaypoh for their own good.     - - - - - - - - - -   if you haven’t already heard, i’m gonna be extending my attachment!   yes, for the next two months, i’ll be going over to the creatives, and be attached to one of the senior copywriters.   this is awesome cause other than journalism, i’ve always been wanting to try my hand at copywriting.   my supervisor (i’m eternally grateful to him) helped put in a word to the creative director, and he was surprisingly open about the idea of a copywriter intern though they haven’t had one before.   so yes, i’m gonna be b**** first ever copywriter intern!    hopefully i live up to their expectations! (and the pay raise they’re gonna be issuing me as well. double the measly 450 bucks!)   also, my supervisor had initially wanted me to help out with a colleague from the PR side on some PR -based stuff, but because i’m honestly quite tired of PR and Account Servicing, i turned him down.   the colleague i’ll be helping is quite pushy by nature anyway (and a whole lot of stuff i’m not saying here) so i don’t think it’ll be easy and pleasant working with her.   i’m delirious at the thought of being able to do copywriting, although i’m quite thankful for all the opportunities i’ve been given to try both PR and account servicing.   i mean, i don’t think quite alot of people could boast of having tried PR, account servicing and creative all in a time span of 6 months.     so yes, i’m horribly glad i was attached to b**** afterall.   remember colleague who made me take my first puff?   well, he’s an account manager over at o***** a***** and he rang me on friday, asking me if i wanted to join his team as an account executive since there’s an immediate opening.       of course i turned him down since i still have one more semester of school to go.   the phone call did leave me with a "what was that all about?" feeling after i hung up though.   so yes, this is a little update on my life!   of course, working at b**** for two more months also means i get to meet the boyfriend for breakfast every morning for another two months, since his workplace is so near mine.     life couldn’t be better.         a note from the boyfriend In this day and age, relationships are not official until they get declared on the internet. So since we aren’t official on Facebook yet, we’ll make it official here first.   And this is the obligatory introductory post, by THE BOYFRIEND.   It’s always hard for me to figure out what to write as an introduction. I mean, how in the world do you condense 30 years of person-building (not character. I have no character) into a few sentences?     And come to think of it, shouldn’t the OWNER of the blog write about who she thinks her boyfriend is? I know I’ll be interested to find out.   In any case, welcome to my world.   Name: Edmund Age: 29 going on 19Chief Dislikes: Mozzies, stupidity and idiot drivers. All of which I believe should be made extinct.   Hobbies: whiskey, reading, pretending to play the guitar, dancing, staring at the owner for no apparent reason, cooking cheese omelettes, finding and seducing hot xmms, and getting them to teach me all kind of morally depraved acts   Main principles in life: I’ll try (almost) everything twice, toesocks and teletubbies are evil, and oh, Illegitimis non Carborandum.   Now that’s not much about me, and all the juicy bits, I’ll leave to the owner of the blog to tell you. So, msV what are YOUR thoughts about the boyfriend?       plurk it! you guys would probably have noticed the huge plurk widget on your right.   yes, yours truly has made the switch from twitter to plurk!   not only is plurk more trustworthy (i get very irritated whenever twitter tells me i cannot read old twits), it’s more interactive, requires less brain juice, and is just a whole lot more fun.   along with this change, i recently decided to venture into the "sleevess-clothes" territory too, and with that, i made up my mind to start lifting weights to tone my arms.   and so i declared it on plurk.     and almost instantly, i got some sort of reaction from the barflies.     i didn’t see these msgs till i got back, and when i did, things got slightly more interesting.     now you see why plurk’s almost like instant messaging.   why, you even get a chance to talk to the all-elusive Qowboy Qaleb! (you do notice he is quite the expert in sexercise, r3gular comes a close second)   so join the CowboyBar on plurk today!     p.s: my arms have indeed became slightly toned. i’m not tellin’ from what though.     think before you speak this scene took place in my office on a weekday night, roughly at about 8.30 pm.   the only people around were the General Manager, my intern friend, colleague-who-doesn’t-take-me-seriously-cause-i-wear-short-dresses, and me.   the GM was there cause well, he was doing work. he usually stays in the office till about 10pm.   my intern friend and colleague WDTMSCIWSD (shortform for the very long sentence above) were there cause they had a press conference to prepare for the following day.   i was there cause i was printing stuff that couldn’t be printed during the working hours as it would hold up the printers.   now, you have to note that colleague WDTMSCIWSD isn’t exactly hardworking, and usually comes into the office only to stroll around languidly, gossiping with other colleagues from other departments while munching on snacks, and then leaves the office at 6 pm sharp just cause i quote her, "my darling hubby’s waiting for me!"   in other words, she was staying back late that day only cause my intern friend who’s under her had to stay late and she couldn’t possibly abandon her in front of the GM.      just then, the GM starts packing his things, getting ready to take his leave. colleague WDTMSCIWSD spies the GM leaving his desk, and goes,   "G! you’re leaving already? that’s pretty early for you, no?"     now when i heard her saying that, my first reaction was, "omg, now she’s gonna get it! she’s gonna get it!" and i was hopping with excitement, in anticipation of our quick-witted and sharp-tongued GM’s retort.   and i had it.       the GM shoots her a side look, then goes,   "well, you wouldn’t know that, would you?"     right after he said that, colleague WDTMSCIWSD got a little flustered because she knew that was quite the truth and immediately tried to make light of the situation by haha-ing away.   meanwhile, i hid behind my computer screen and giggled together with my intern friend at her foolishness.   talk about shooting yourself in the foot.       and yes, i really do dislike colleague WDTMSCIWSD alot, cause she’s not only fat, she’s lazy, greedy, loud, and doesn’t take me seriously.   ahh… revenge is sweet.         ugly singaporeans i was on the train earlier on and i saw something that greatly disturbed me.   now, i was standing in the middle of the cabin and talking on the phone, when i felt someone’s foot pushing against mine. so i turned behind, and saw this foreigner sleeping soundly on his seat, and because he was sliding a little down his seat, his foot hit mine.   and so i moved away.   about 30 seconds after i moved away, he started sliding down his seat. of course, the people sitting beside him started shifting away from him, because he was sliding down so fast, he soon landed on the ground of the mrt train with a loud thud.     he reeked of alcohol, and when he laid snoozing on the ground, he dribbled a little.   that was when this guy declared loudly that "he’s going to puke!", which caused a flurry of activity within the cabin as everyone rushed to move as far away as they could away from him.   now, that is understandable, cause if you see a drunkard and you figure he’s about to puke, your natural instinct would be to move away.   what happpened next was totally uncalled for though.   when the drunk foreigner slumped over on the ground, as if seeking a more comfortable position to lie in, two chinese guys sitting nearby whipped out their cameras and handphones and started snapping away.   while they gleefully took pictures, they laughed out loud, making snide comments about the drunk foreigner, saying things like how they should cover his face with a newspaper, how dirty and unkempt he looked, and how they were going to upload the videos and pictures to stomp and lianhe wanbao.   one of the guys even excitedly exclaimed that the pictures he took might make it to the headlines of lianhe wanbao. (which i highly doubt so. wanbao might be trashy, but still.)   what disgusted me even further was that when the drunk foreigner shifted his leg and it hit one of the chinese guy’s leg, he immediately gave it a kick without even considering if it would cause the foreigner pain.   while i looked on in disgust as the two guys and their companions mocked the poor drunk, i made up my mind to inform the mrt staff about the foreigner as soon as the train hit boon lay.   when we got to clementi, one of the chinese guys got out, and when he did, he made sure he declared loudly to the other guy whom he had just made friends with (cause both of them are rude idiots) to "remember to send the photos to stomp hor!"     i was fuming inside for the foreigner, but by then, the other chinese guy had kept his camera, choosing instead to merely stare at the foreigner lying on the ground in front of him.     when the train reached jurong east interchange, he got out, and a mrt staff entered the cabin.   he examined the foreigner, checking his wrist for a pulse, and rearranging his attire.   now, while the staff was doing that, there was this girl dressed in goth who filmed down the entire process with her handphone, smiling away, probably cause she thought it was very funny.   i stared hard at her.   when she saw how pissed i looked, her smile faded and she kept her handphone away.   when the train finally reached boon lay station, two other mrt staff entered and carried the foreigner away.     i’m truly disgusted by the behavior of these ugly singaporeans.   i feel for the foreigner. it’s a horrible feeling of unjust, repulsiveness, and mainly anger.     how would you feel if you were drunk one day, fell into a deep slumber, and woke up the next day to find pictures of you splashed all across the papers and on websites?   somehow, i had the feeling that perhaps they were so callous, only because the drunk guy was a bangladeshi.   would singaporeans still whip out their phones eagerly if it was a fellow singaporean who was dead drunk on the train?     i doubt so.   maybe the fault lies with sites and papers like stomp and wanbao, where readers are urged to send in pictures, just so.   that’s when people start taking pictures of every single thing they see, even when it is not their right to do so, as in this situation.   whatever it was, i left the train station with a bitter aftertaste in my mouth, sickened at the distasteful behaviour of our fellow singaporeans.   the obligatory post-birthday entry we’ll let the pictures do the talking! (literally, cause i’m too lazy to bother with text. captions will do!)   the two mensa girlies.   i forgot how this picture was taken. i think i was trying to avert the avid shutterbug thiang. ("avert the avid"’s a bit of a tongue-twister isn’t it? heh.)   from here on, the pictures are all slightly crazy cause we had finished dinner and were just mucking around.   they are also heavily photoshopped cause (i won’t mince my words here), we all look like shit in the originals.       were you trying to smack thiang’s head, shy?      proper group shot.     okay, so the scene which took place before this picture was taken was this:   *scrambles around* "come! come! let’s all take a shot with us pointing at thiang’s boobs since she’s the only flat-chested one among us!" "okay okay! yay!" *positions ourselves, big grins framing our faces* *thiang wails*     er, we’ll leave the description for this to later.   this shot wasn’t as easy to take as it looks. and i realised my cheekbones look quite scary.   i like this one best. it’s my wallpaper now!   less photoshop for this one. and i think thiang looks real cute here. thiang, you should walk around with this expression permanently stuck on your face.     candid picture!   kimo’s right ear interests me.   kimo, sorry, unflattering pic! shyanne looks mysterious. thiang looks like she can’t speak properly.  i look like a fish.     the girls forced us to take this.     shy, your hair is eating you up and threatening to eat me up as well.     i have no idea why thiang looks delirious.     after dinner at fish and co, we then headed to arab street for sheesha!       it was my first time trying sheesha and being the enthusiastic little bee that i was, i buzzed around the pipe a little too much, taking in too deep breaths.   which of course, resulted in me feeling groggy after about half an hour. the boyfriend did say i was a natural though.   it was a pretty good birthday in general, cause other than the fantastic company, i also had sincere wellwishes and cards! thanks to sujith darling, nadia shah, kimo, thiang, shy, david, eric, uncle jay, posh jie jie, carrie, malcolm, daniel, karl, joshua, grace, cheryl, jiangrong, melvin, joanne, dave, benson, manda, xueting, derren, darryl, dee and all the barflies for your smses, tags, comments, facebook msgs!   special thanks to uncle jay too for his chalkboard drawing:     ah yes, he’s been calling me tadpole ever since he read that particular entry.   as for the cards …      see that 作文纸 thinggy?   the boyfriend wrote me a letter on that, in chinese, totalling 4 pages! now i can really tell people i’ve received a true blue 情书。  i’m not about to reproduce the letter though, cause some points are for my *ahem* private reading only, and i’ll not be doing justice to his pretty handwriting by typing it out.   shyanne and kimberly also tried to fool me with my birthday gift, putting it in a ngee ann printed envelope and telling me it was something from mr shan.     of course i called their bluff.   i ish not stewpid hor!   and well, if till now you still have yet to figure out who the new boyfriend is, you ought to be smacked. (the kissing picture’s big enough okay!)   he’s 30, (okay, altogether now, gasp!) and well, 11 years older than me.   see, i told you i liked my men old.   and you know what they say about older guys always wanting you to "grow up" and meet their maturity level?    he is however, extrememly forgiving towards his nut of a girlfriend who has bouts of random crazinesss. i do suspect it’s cause he’s pretty nutty himself. also, i do have my mature moments. (they just don’t surface very much when he’s around)    well, you guys’ll be seeing more of him in time to come, so the formalities can wait.   :D   over at the office, the PR team as well as some of the Account Servicing colleagues threw me a surprise birthday party.   basically, they all left their seats around 6, and it was just me, and my supervisor around. (let’s call him D)   so D walked up to me, and asked if we could talk.   of course my natural instinct told myself, "eileen, you’re in deep shit" but i still waited to see what he would say.   he asked,   "eileen, have you heard anything bad about your working attitude from S and N lately?"   S and N are the colleagues who delegate the bulk of the work to me.   "no, why?"   "oh, cause … (long pause) they’ve been telling me some stuff about you. are you sure they haven’t told you anything?"   *thinks hard, then decides to be honest, which was a pretty dumb move*  "well, for S not really. As for N, she just told me to be more careful cause i’m getting a little careless due to me being so busy."   "ahhh.. come, let’s head to the boardroom so we can have a better talk."   *follows D into boardroom, spies someone’s ass, and knows immediately what they’re up to*   the next half an hour was then spent being touched over them taking pains to plan the surprise, making my thank you speech, cutting the yummy cake, then muching on it and the gummy bears which were used to adorn it, and wondering to myself how stupid i was to spill to D my flaws when he obviously weren’t picking on them.     and the worse thing is, i had decided that when it’s time for me to bade my goodbyes, i would only write cards/notes to the colleagues whom i like and are nice to me, and totally ignore the rest.   unfortunately, since they’re all so nice, (well, maybe only because it’s my birthday), i can’t possibly be discriminatory and only write to some of them.   still, i don’t want to be a two-faced hypocrite.   i think i shall choose nice cards for the genuinely nice colleagues, and generic, slightly-fugly ones for the rest.   heh.   and hereso ends the post-birthday entry.   i’m 19!!!             pop the party poopers! i’m officially nineteen.   i’ve also officially abandoned my "single" status.     more details tomorrow!  20 random facts about me i’m fully aware i keep posting memes as entries but i’m in the midst of drafting one titled "my dream kid" and i need more time!   need to look for pictures you know.   anyway, meme!   as a sidenote, do you know the term "meme" was first coined by richard dawkins in "the selfish gene" back in 1976? i think it sounds cute, just like how i think "blob" sounds squishy-cute, and "blurb" abruptly-cute.   okay, i know, i’m weird.   and so, random fact 1 of the day.   1. i like english. alot. i don’t quite know all the rules and shit but i can tell where exactly the grammatical errors are when i look at a sentence. i don’t know what’s a verb, i think i know what’s a noun. i know what’s an adjective. i can’t quite remember what’s a dangling modifier. (writ comm horrors!)   2. i really want my future kid to be dark and mysterious and named clementine. (more on this in the next entry)    3. i pop mints like crazy. specifically eclipse spearmint mints. at close to 4 bucks a tin, this is an expensive habit, especially when it’s nearly 1 tin a day. but you know what’s special about eclipse mints?  even after you pop all of ‘em, you don’t get a tummyache. try that with ricola or lakerol and i guarantee you that after half a box, your tummy’ll be stirring uncomfortably. one box later, you’ll be in the toilet shitting your guts out. eclipse is king.   4. i prefer my dad to my mum. she flares up for nothing then vents her anger on everyone. that’s reason enough for me to dislike her.   5. i dislike, or rather, can’t make small talk. this is why during bar outings, i usually sit beside someone and start talking to him/her about his/her ambitions/goals in life/whether he likes his job. (tehsi, you would know this very well, i presume. ) it is however, quite hard to make serious talk when rick price/TK is screeching "heaven knows" into your ear.    6. i like talking to myself/clementine/things. so far, i’ve made conversation with my laptop, the desktop in the office, the scanner, the photocopier, the paperclips, the binding machine, my shoes, my clothes and my handphone. i am perfectly sane though. clementine can play testament to that.     7. i burst into tears when i’m angry. when i’m unhappy/sad, i talk to myself.   8. i like wearing dresses cause they’re so convenient. i like them short cause airiness = not so hot. yes, even at the risk of people not taking me seriously.   9. i like everything strawberry-ish.   10. i have really rough knees cause i fell down at least thrice a month back when i was a kid. these days, i’m still as clumsy. i trip, but i always catch myself before i land on my ass.   11. i’m obsessed about my weight. i usually hover around 45kg, but i want to be about 40 and still keep my boobs. maybe 39. i don’t know.   12. i like my legs best. then my boobs. then my eyelashes. and my lips!   13. i like my arms least. chunky, lard-ridden trunks of fat.   14. when i like a particular food, i can keep eating it and never get sick of it. i had fish soup 384 days out of 728 days (2 years). this unfortunately, doesn’t apply to human beings.   15. i like to plan ahead and stick to a routine. this is why i make sure i read every single blog on my blogroll every single day even when i’m dead tired. it’s also why i have to shower first before having breakfast, then read the papers while eating and waiting for my hair to dry. if my routine gets upset, i get upset.   16. i used to enjoy reading the papers. then i joined b****, and had to do media monitoring. the straits times, the new paper, the business times, today, my paper, wanbao, zaobao and shinmin. i read all of them everyday. when it’s monday, i have to read through 3 days worth of newspapers. now, i can’t stand the sight of them.   17. and i hate mondays.   18. when i was a kid, i used to like biting people. now, people like *coughs* leaving me bites.   19. i was in the executive committee of the prefectorial board for all 4 years of my secondary school life.   i was monitress for the first 3 years only cause me and melvin (he was my partner-in-crime for all 3 years as well) got sick of being in charge of a class where all the boys were juvenile and stupid and decided to tell our teacher that we didn’t want to take on the same role anymore. yes, i is miss goody-two-shoes.   20. i still want sea angels, a sloth, tadpoles and salamanders as pets. and oh, serangoon central sells REALLY fat goldfishes. but i don’t quite fancy them anymore. they sell cute, tiny pufferfish though. heh.   and that’s it!   i tag thiang, shy, kimo, sujith and anyone who wants to do this.     tomorrow’s my birthday, as well as the announcement of something big!   can’t wait! grousings i feel like you don’t quite care.   and you, you’re always sarcastic though you say you’re not.   you gross me out when you trudge all around the office, sitting on tables and gossiping, muching on food as the fat spills out from your jeans.   you’re so childish i can’t believe you’re 25. and i roll my eyes everytime i hear you on the phone in that pixie voice.   you touch my stuff one too often.   you’re so stuckup.   you ought to grow some backbone.   you need to be less lazy and stop flooding me with work.   you should start standing up for yourself.   you need to stop reading my blog cause knowing you do somehow disgusts me.     you need to stop behaving like a i-know-it-all bitch. just cause you have it doesn’t mean others can’t. and you need to lose weight.     and eileen, you need to stop complaining about random people. but since it’s your blog, you’re forgiven.       just not in a good mood lah.           i know, i know.     these days, my entries have been reduced to pictures and msn/real life conversations filled ones.   well, i can’t help it if the people around me are so terribly quote-worthy, can i?   then again, the reason for me not blogging so often is cause of well, what else but the four-letter word.   work.   when i first started my attachment, i was attached to the account servicing side, but i was seated near the public relations department.  and because there wasn’t much work to be done over at the AS side, and i was seated so conveniently next to them, the PR side gave me work to do.   so from merely consolidating of information, doing media monitoring, i’ve progressed to writing press releases, pitching; basically the real deal, for 3 accounts from the PR side.   3 months into my attachment, my colleagues from AS decided to hand me 2 accounts to work on, because they liked my working attitude. i’ve got to handle clients, handle the creatives and handle the traffic people (and trust me, they are mean-tempered).   the thing is, though the colleagues from the PR dept see me skipping lunches just so i can rush out another progressive memo, ta-baoing lousy food back to the office just so i can draft a media Q&A, having huge pockets of time before i reply my msn msgs and hp msgs, (of course they don’t get to see this lah!) they make no effort to reduce the amount of workload i have.   i appreciate the opportunities i’m given to shine, it’s just, i feel over-loaded, over-saddled, and just very, very tired at times.   but of course, the up side to this is that i get to learn skills from both trades.   and well, since it’s all ending in a month’s time, i should just shut up and swallow the load.   then again, when it all ends, i have more decisions to make. during my two month semester break, do i want to:   a) stay in b**** and keep working in AS? the downside to this is i’ll probably be still drowning in work since i’m pretty sure the PR side is not gonna let me off.   b) stay in b**** but work under another guy who’s been trying to poach me over? the downside to this is that this is the same guy who keeps trying to get me to go drinking and made me take my first puff. he is also slightly lecherous.   c) stay in b**** but work in the creative department? i want to be a copywriter so badly, but so far, the feedback i’ve received, even from my supervisor is that you might be passionate about your work in creative, but you won’t necessarily get recognised for it.   d) work for him?  well, like uncle jay said, the idea of office sex might be enticing, but still, it’s not advisable to eat and shit at the same place. and i might get bored, from seeing him so often.   e) work for another friend who’s looking for an intern in a web design firm? one, my dreamweaver skills suck. and the office is located on some hill which has a never-ending flight of steps up. i want toned legs, not serena-williams legs.   f) take it easy and be a starbucks barista and flirt with all the cute guys i serve. two words: low pay. also, singapore doesn’t have that many cute guys.   see how i’m stuck in a rut?     but oh well, i guess i’ll be forced to make up my mind when the time comes.   moving on, let’s talk about happier stuff! like my birthday!   it falls on a friday this year and although everyone in the office is entitled to birthday leave, us interns aren’t.   i know, just cause we’re at the bottom of the food chain, we don’t get taken seriously when we wear short dresses and we don’t get birthday leave.     i’m going to try and apply for it though, just cause i’m such a good intern i haven’t taken even one day of leave or MC in the past 3 months.   anyway, i’m going to post up my birthday wishlist cause people have been bugging me to do so.   (in no particular order)                   first row (from left to right): polaroid camera, ck be, white women’s loafers, moleskin notebook. second row: tadpoles, kate spade wallet, wellingtons!, benetint from benefit. third row: high beam from benefit, assorted high-waisted skirts. fourth row: high-waisted shorts, tiffany somerset ring, polaroid pins from fredflare, old-school messenger bag!   i guess that’s about it. and oh, sincere, handwritten messages.   i’m not that demanding, am i?   and since it’s almost tradition to start/end off entries with conversations, i’ll do just that.   *while walking to his place from the carpark*   "why is that guy staring at me?!!"   "he is?"   "ya, he’s staring at my boobs."   "well, they are pretty stare-able."   "who does he think he is?! that he has the right to stare at them?"   "i agree. he ought to ask me for permission first."        now you know why i say my conversations with people are always quote-worthy.   postcards and a lousy grasp of the chinese language this week’s secrets are all pretty interesting, but i thought i would pick out a few of my favourites.   very magnamious wife indeed.   i just lay out toilet paper on the seat if it looks dirty. two layers, at least.     when i watch tv, i always observe the actresses to see if they have a fat face/thighs/calves/arms or a tummy. i can’t stop too.   they all start out young, don’t they?   pictures credit to post secret.   - - - - -  - - - - -   so i was over at his place and we were making dinner. cheese omelette to be specific.   "and now we need black pepper!"   *grabs bottle of pepper and jumps about excitedly* "how much of it?"   "试量."   "okay!" *enthusiastically shakes the bottle four times*   *looks up at him for approval*   he starts cracking up.   "what?! wrong meh?"   he continues laughing.   i rethink whatever he just said. then it hits me.     "oh, you mean 试量 is to taste? shit, i didn’t know it meant that. i thought you meant 四-something, so i shoke the bottle four times anyway."   he is still laughing.   later, when we sample the cheese omelette, he says it’s too peppery.   but you know what? i think it tastes just fine.       over-enthusiasm you know you’ve got it bad when you tell his mother that you’re a twin, and she whips around excitedly and goes,   "does that mean you’ll have twins in the future too?"     dear auntie, you might be looking for a daughter-in-law, but i sure as hell ain’t looking for a hubby.   and there’s no way i’m having kids. twins, triplets or not.   i know, handling mothers isn’t exactly my forte.       now we’ll just have to wait and see what happenes when he meets my mum.       let me pose a question to you. what’s the first thing that comes to your mind when you know of a 30 year old male dating a 19 year old female?       note: it’s a question, not a declaration. so don’t get ideas in your head.  dads so you guys all know my mum left for taiwan on wed.   the night before she flew, she did this.      three notices, one for each of us in the house, stuck up in the hallway in the living room where it’s pretty damn hard to miss.   so each of us have duties assigned, with the responsibility of the housework falling mostly on my dad’s shoulders. she wrote on his list, "tidy the house when you’re free".   note, though she mentioned "when you’re free", as though giving him an option, she sure as hell won’t be sparing him a tongue-lashing if she comes home and finds the house dirty.   so it’s not much of a choice afterall.   the funny thing is, if you take a closer look, you’ll notice a point that’s repeated on all our 3 lists.   on dad’s list.     on sister’s list.   on my list.   on all 3 lists, she constantly, incessantly reminds me to not come home late, and also commands the sister and father to keep an eye on me.    walao.       the worse part is, my dad seems to be taking her advice really seriously, because for the past few days, he has been calling me during work just to "check up" on me.   while i just returned from a meeting with a client and was waiting at the lift lobby, he rang, and upon hearing the noise in the background, took on a suspicious tone and started questioning me on my whereabouts.   now what’s so ironic about this situation is that he rang me at 5.30pm, and asked me if i was on my way home.   yes, my dad does not know that my official knock-off time is at 6. (but i usually OT all the way till 7)  he is under the assumption that i knock off at 4, and hence i should be on my way home at 5.30 pm on a wednesday evening.     see lah, want to play the good father role for once when the mother is away, but is still cock-blur.   and yes, he is really that blur.     only a couple of months back, while filling up some forms, he beckoned me over and asked,   "how old are you ah?"   i shot him an incredulous look.     "i know lah, 17 right?"   yes dad, your daughter is still 17 and an innocent, starry-eyed little girl.   riiiiggghhht.     bombay tea party   so this time i got sloshed again, only because i downed about 6 glasses worth of vodka, martell, and bombay.   it was so bad, i was walking stumbling around the bar declaring my drunken state to everyone, got coerced into doing something that’s unspeakable but unfortunately, a very good photo opportunity (i will personally see to it that the pictures do not get posted up hor, UNCLE JAY!), and scared Teh Si half to death by asking him if he wanted a kiss as payment for getting my bag.   the poor boy muttered a "er, no thanks, i think you better head home" and scurried away.     i was so wasted, i was led out by a very kind TK to take a short walk because according to him, "walking raises your metabolism rate and makes you feel better".   someone needs to verify that statement cause i don’t quite believe him.   the conversation between me and him during the walk went something like that (from what i can remember) :    me: "how do you know if someone’s drunk?"   tk: "oh, you know it. they can’t walk in a straight line."   me: *indignantly* "but i can!"   i then attempt to prove my point by walking along the road divider while there are cars heading towards me.     so apt right, the emoticon.   but anyway, i didn’t die, and instead, felt the urge to pee.   so i declared it.   tk: "eh, there’s a macdonald’s in front. we’ll head there so you can relieve yourself okay?"   me: "but mac’s a family restaurant! i can’t possibly walk in and let them see me drunk!"   tk: "it’s already 12.30 am my dear. there won’t be any families in there to see you drunk."    me: *ponders for abit* "true, but aiya, let’s head back to plush to pee."   i then get pulled back to plush where i totally forgot about peeing until i reach home.   Vandalin who sent me home also noted that i kept punching my cheeks during the ride because according to him, i was continuously chanting, "my face feels numb!".   no wonder my hamster cheeks seemed to have grown quite abit since friday.    when he finally dropped me off, he hung around for abit in the car, watching me make my way down the path in full glory of my drunken stupor, just to make sure that, i quote him, "don’t stumble and fall flat on your face."   so nice of him.    and so i conclude that i’m a scary force to reckon with when i’m drunk.     anyway, the mother’s going away on a week-long holiday starting wednesday!   i’ve already planned out what i’m going to do during the weekends when she’s not around, and so far, the plans looks like this: "sleepover", "good food", "alcohol", and "tadpoles."     yes, that’s how excited i am.   mischief’s spelt m-u-m’-s-n-o-t-a-r-o-u-n-d and i sure am getting into a whole lot of it!   will post pictures of my tadpoles when i get them!           Protected: spill This post is password protected. To view it please enter your password below: Password: meme and black, wriggly things 7 RANDOM FACTS ABOUT ME:  - i have naturally wavy hair, which i have a love-hate relationship with. - i have a twin sister, whom i have a love-hate relationship with. - i get an adrenaline rush from having my schedule jam-packed with work and meetings. - i don’t get aroused thinking about johnny depp. (surprisingly) - i have a thing for older men. - i’m a geek at heart. i love watching documentaries! - i love poking fat, spongy things. eg: goldfish, water babies, chubby cheeks etc. (can someone buy me tadpoles already? i miss touching them. )   7 THINGS THAT SCARE ME:   - Cockroaches - Foreign workers staring at me - The presence of inefficient people in my project groups - My dad when he flares up - toddlers on their wobbly feet - Impending deadlines and a lack of time  - realising i’ve put on weight    7 RANDOM SONGS AT THE MOMENT:   - Always Be My Baby - David Cook - Let It Be - Brooke White (yes, i’m a American Idol fanatic, cannot ah?) - Like A Star - Corinne Bailey Rae - Something Stupid - Nicole Kidman & Robbie Williams - Say It Right - Nelly Furtado - Soulmate - Natasha Beddingfield - Iris - Goo Goo Dolls   7 THINGS I SAY THE MOST:   - "What the fuck?!" - "Stuuuupiiiddd" - "Whatever", accompanied by the rolling of eyes. - "But … but … Walao!" *stamps foot*  - "Awesome!" - "[insert name here]’s so fucking [insert adjective here]" - "My mum’s not that dumb." (after repeated attempts by A to get me to stay out late)   7 THINGS I TREASURE THE MOST (in no ranking order):   - my existence - my safety pillow - my milo stash - my accessories (i know it doesn’t look it at the rate i’m losing them but i really do!) - my mum, when she’s not nagging, that is - the majority of my friends - noel   7 "FIRST TIME" THINGS I EVER DID:   - wasted my life away during a two-month semester break ( i swear i got sick of tv and the net) - fell asleep having someone watch me salivate - made a card and a book with mushy details for someone i was in love with - co-owned a pet with someone else (actually, pets, but the hamsters all died. ) - told the tuition kids to shut up - wore a dress and decided to abandon my jeans ever since - bought a mac and became a fangirl. heh.   i’m not tagging anyone. whoever needs an entry filler, you can do it!   speaking of tadpoles, i shared my desire of rearing one with a couple of friends.     yes, i have very nice friends who play along gamingly with me.   chuwen then let rip a shocking revelation.     i don’t care. i will make sure my tadpoles eat grass, and only grass. and if they’re good, maybe the dead skin on my finger when i reach in to stroke them.    you’ll see when i get them.  i is fickle-minded. i was waiting for my bus in the queue at the interchange when i saw him.   crew-cut, tanned skin, large, dewy eyes.   he stared right back at me. i noticed he was staring especially hard at my legs, them clad in tights.   i stared right back at him.     cocking his head, his expression read, "how come her legs are black in color?"   i stuck my tongue out at him.   he shot me a shy smile, before ducking behind his mother’s legs. looking up at her, he tattled on me.   his mother turned around, irritated, looking for the girl with black legs who stuck her tongue out at her son.   thank johnny god for small bones. ( i should really be thanking my dad instead)   once his mum returned her attention to the book in front of her, he peeked from behind her legs, a tiny smirk on his face.   as the queue progressed, he kept his gaze on me, allowing himself to look away only when his mother nudged him to move along.   it’ s times like these when i re-think my decision to not have kids in future.   then i see him running towards the bus as it enters the interchange, trooping up the steps and stamping his feet in progression.  his mother yells at him to behave himself, but he charges past her, plonking his ass hard on a seat, then grinning widely at her.         okay, no kids.   then again, toddlers are horribly cute. even when you give them a little push and they fall flat on their faces, they simply clamber up again after lying there in stunned silence for abit.   wonderfully resilient creatures.     okay, fine. no kids.         what’s wrong with showing some leg? in my office, "dear"s, "darling"s and "you’re so sweet" are dropped like hair off a balding man everyday.   because i sit right in front of the PR desk, i get to hear all their phone conversations, and a typical one usually sounds like this:   *in a chirpy voice, several octaves higher than their usual*    "oh hello dear! how are you! oh, i’m goooooddd! *giggles* ….(blah blah, a whole lot of unnecessary chatter)….oh thank you so much dahhhling! you’re so sweet! yes yes, meet up soon okay! *another long chain of giggles erupt* okay sure thing! thank you once again deaaaarrr! see you!"   miss chirpy then goes back to smashing the keys on her keyboard.   true, it is necessary to maintain good relations with the media when you’re in public relations, but then again, fake does not equate to being sincere.   when i carry out tasks for them, they go, "thank you dear!" without as much passing me a look. you know, sometimes a "thanks" accompanied by a tiny smile would work much better.   hell, i don’t know if they go "thank you dear!" to the cleaning auntie too when she empties the wastepaper basket underneath our desks everyday.   if they do, it’ll be weird.   not that i don’t express my thanks to her, i always make sure i apologise to her sincerely every evening because i’m such a messy eater that the bin’s always filled with a whole load of trash.   but anyway, what i just mentioned does not have to do with anything i’ll be bitching about later.   no, whoever i’m going to be talking about later is *coughs* not necessarily in the PR team. *coughs*   so this colleague, let’s call her B for easy reference (go figure what B stands for).   ever since day 1 when i entered the company, she’s been bitching about my dresses and skirts, which in her opinion (however green-eyed it might be), are too short.   she nudges my other intern friend and tells her to "tell your friend that her dress is very short leh", declares in front of the team during lunch that "her dress is really very short hor", and tells me right in my ear that "not everyone wants to look at your assets".   well, good to know that she thinks my legs are assets, for one.   of course i didn’t quite bother about her, because hey, if even my mum’s not complaining (and she’s quite particular about the way i dress, especially when it comes to tops, but that’s another story for another entry), then why is she?   besides, i personally don’t think my dresses are short. they don’t shoot right up to reveal my buttcheeks or anything and if a situation like that threatens, there’s always tights.   this incident that happened on friday just further proves my point.   while out lunching with my intern friend, she once again brings up the topic of my dresses being too short.   "seriously, nobody’s going to take her seriously if she keeps wearing her short dresses".   this coming from someone who wears tops with her cleavage spilling out. talk about hypocrisy.   so my conclusion is that she’s just very, very jealous. either that, or she just can’t stand the sight of lean, toned gams with dresses/skirts swishing about them in front of her.    which also means she’s jealous lah.       my friend, A, offered an awesome solution though. i’ve recently discovered that i can fit into his formal shirts quite nicely, and i somehow end up looking like this:   sleepy out-of-bed hair, sleeves of shirt ending near my fingers, the bottom of the shirt cupping my ass just very nicely.   no, fat hope if you were wishing for a picture.    so while i told him that he ought to loan me a couple of shirts when the school term starts, just so that i can put them on during lazy-to-dress-up-days, he remarked that i should just put on one of them and strut to work.   and then when i see B, walk up to her and go,   "you know B, i decided you’re right. my skirt is too short. so i thought i would wear a shirt. and nothing but a shirt.  *blinks peepers in mock innocence*     what a brilliant comeback.             four peas in a pod this morning while i was in the lift, i spotted my neighbour. the times when i’ve seen her around, she usually only has one of her daughters hanging off her hips.   and well, like father like son, like mother like daughter, and so, i didn’t find it weird that her daughter looked alot like her.   but today, she had all 3 of her daughters with her.   and the freaky thing was, all 3 of them were exact replicas of her.   all 3 of them were carbon copies, from the 12 year old right down to the 5 year old.   i swear to Johnny Depp (he’s God, remember?), i’ve never seen children that looked so alike their mother before. there must have been a genetic malfunction somewhere.   and you know what’s the worst thing about the incredibly striking resemblance?     the mother’s not exactly fantastic-looking.       poor kids.         ya ya, i know. i can’t help it. bitchy’s in my blood.       when shit comes, it all comes together huh?   - menstrual cramps  - cut on tongue - aching wisdom tooth - only 3.5 hours of sleep    and to top it all off, an eye infection which leaves me no choice but to don my spectacles to work and risk looking like a 14 year old kid with a bloodshot left eye.   awesome.     if you want to see an uglified, makeup-less (no mascara and eyeliner! fuuuuuccckkk!) eileen, feel free to pop by shaw towers.   no guarantees i won’t give you a good rap on the head when i see you laughing though.   yes, yes the entry’s deleted (for the slow ones who didn’t catch it, ) not because i got googled out, but because i happened to catch sight of a presentation some of my colleagues were working on today, and in it, featured some of the pictures i had.   so i thought if they were going to "resell" our agency to the client, i better not reveal anything just as yet.   so for those of you who managed to read it, good for you!   anyway, i’m in a lazy mood today so it’s meme time!   unfortunately, i had to make quite a number of changes to the meme, cause the questions were riddled with grammatical errors.   so much for laziness.     here goes!   *tagged by thiang   1. At what age do you wish to get married? i haven’t thought about this one honestly. i don’t know, 35? life’s too short to get tied down so early. besides, marriage is overrated.   2. How many children do you want? 1 little boy with blonde hair and no body. no, i’m serious. and two huge dogs. then i can leash them up and walk all 3 down the street.     3. What do i want the most now? To impress those i feel deserve impressing. and to be honest, more money. (what!)   4. What did you want to be when you were growing up? A doctor and a veterinarian at first. Then i realised i do get slightly dizzy at the sight of blood, and it evolved to a deejay. Then my mother told me i speak too quickly, and so it was to be a lawyer. But argueing doesn’t quite give me the same rush as writing does so it was to be a journalist! But i’m too damn lazy to write long articles so i’ve FINALLY decided, i want to be a copywriter.  and maybe, a freelance journalist along the way.   5. If you can have one dream that would come true, what would it be? To have Johnny Depp give me a backrub.   6. What are you afraid to lose now? My stuff! yes, the knocker on the lion-headed ring that i blogged about? i lost it. for real this time.   7. Do you believe in being in love forever? I tire of people really easily, so nah.   8. If you meet someone you love, would you confess your love to him/her? (I realised these questions are very cheesy) nonetheless, i guess i would, but not before making sure the opposite party has at least a semblance of liking towards me first.    9. What do you do when you’re feeling down and depressed? I talk to myself. I usually cheer me up.   10. What are the requirements you have of your other half? Has a sense of humour that i actually appreciate (no lame jokes please), is intelligent, is secure and confident, knows what he wants in life, non-MCP, has nice teeth, soft lips, big hands, can give a good backrub, can play a musical instrument. i’ll add on to the list when i can think of more.   11. Which type of person do you dislike most? Those who don’t initiate to do work.   12. Do you cherish every single friend? Not every one of them, but those that i don’t, i appreciate the fact that at least i met them.   13. Do you believe in God? Johnny Depp is God. waddya think?   14. What do you think is the most important thing in your life? if it’s a what, it’s my safety pillow. if it’s a who, it’s myself.   15. Do you find it necessary to have a boyfriend? It’s not a necessity. you just don’t have to trouble yourself when you need someone to sleep with.   16. What do you want your friends to be like? Themselves wll do.   17. What kind of friend do you want to appear like in your friends’ eyes? Someone who wouldn’t judge them, who’s willing to listen and (sometimes, just sometimes) give good advice, someone who’s fun to hang around with.   18. If you could, which part of your character would you like to change? i’m too straightforward for my own good. but then again, i like me the way i am.   19. If you feel low, who do you go to? i go to a corner and talk to myself and i’ll feel better.   20. What is the last thing on  your mind before you go to bed? "I will start my exercise routine tomorrow."           the change agency so my company had an internal launch a couple of days back, where we all had great food, a great presentation, and great conversation. (you do know i’m saying this just in case i get googled out, don’t you?)   the theme was "change", since we’re now termed the change agency, and prior to the launch, they had little notices taped all over the office, just to prep us up for the big day.   here’s a look at the clever little things.   to be taken lightly of course.    i don’t quite think anyone did that.       these two were placed at the reception desk. vic and yati are our dear receptionists who never fail to greet us with a chirpy "good morning!" everyday.     ah yes, those are skate scooters you see.  and it’s not funny trying to avoid the paths of colleagues zipping around the office crazily on them.   the dreaded photocopying machine. i talk to it at least once a day, under hushed breaths. "oh come on you stupid thing! hurry up!"     the coffee machine which i have yet figured out how to use.     in our office, the ladies are on the left, and the gents on the right. i didn’t see any pee left on the toilet seats in the ladies though so i suppose everyone ignored these notices.     and in the ladies we have,     "you’ll look better with a new hairdo".   and         these two were on the walls beside the big bosses’ desks. heh.       a looooonnnngggg board placed near the recep where we all get to choose our eyes and unleash our creativity.     these were left on our desks early in the morning (okay, i actually helped to give them out) to invite everyone to head to the pantry for the launch. and yes, personalised cupcakes!   we each got a set.   and that’s about it!   awesome isn’t it? i’m glad i’m working (well, intern-ing actually) in a company that actually bothers to dress up an internal launch, throwing up such witty and original ideas. (no, this time round i’m not saying just cause i might get googled out)   anyway, tomorrow (tues), i’ll be over at VicoCity’s Ben & Jerry’s helping out with the Free Cone Day. so if you’re up for some free ice cream and need a bit of chatter while licking that cone, pop by and say hi!