What an Elaborate Way to Keep us in the Dark, Temasek Frankly, it has been super-annoying to make sense of the latest figures from Temasek. A lot of questions and head-scratching has been going on and honestly, I just wanted to ignore all the crap and tried hard to suppress the indignity of being treated a fool by my own government. But thanks to being tagged in a Facebook message (*looks at Seelan*) - the straw that broke the proverbial camel's back - I began making sense of the latest statements from Temasek Holdings (a.k.a. the bermuda triangle of taxpayer money).What I have gathered is as such:26 August 2008 - Temasek announces its performance for Financial Year (April 2007 to March 2008) and reports that its portfolio value increased 13% from S$164 billion to S$185 billion (source: Temasek Review 2008 & Temasek Holdings)August 2008 - Annual Temasek Review defines the VaR as a 'statistical model that estimates the potential loss on a portfolio for a given confidence level ... for a 12-month period at an 84% confidence level (and) is derived using a Monte Carlo simulation based on three years of price data'; and estimates the theorectical figure for 2008 to be S$40 billion - as compared to S$24 billion for 2007 (source: Temasek Review 2008 & Temasek Review 2007)10 February 2009 - Senior Minister of State for Finance, Lim Hwee Hua reveals in parliament that Temasek's 'net portfolio value at 30 November 2008 was S$127 billion', however AFP's request for confirmation of that figure from Temasek goes unanswered (sources: Singapore Parliament & AFP)28 May 2009 - Minister for Finance, Tharman Shanmugaratnam corroborates Lim Hwee Hua's version by declaring in parliament that the 'full year accounts to end March 2009 have not been audited, but the picture should not be fundamentally different from what I have described as equity markets globally showed no major change as at end March 2009 compared to end November 2008' (source: Singapore Parliament)29 July 2009 - CEO of Temasek, Ho Ching shares in a speech at a forum that the estimation of the VaR at S$40 billion 'has turned out to be so, and more' (source: Institute of Policy Studies)So, essentially, nobody is lying about the figures - but they aren't telling the complete truth either. The 'magical' S$40 billion thrown up yesterday is merely a theoretical figure derived from a (purely) statistical estimation.My speculation is that if the value of the losses was less than the November 2008 figure of S$58 billion (S$185 bilion - S$127 billion), Temasek would have used this opportunity to trumpet this positivity. Therefore, the very fact that no actual figure was mentioned and a wholly-theoretical number was relied upon instead (when concrete figures would be available to the CEO by now) suggests that the losses might very well be GREATER than the recorded S$58 billion.Of course, a nice capital injection from Temasek's only shareholder, the Singapore Minsitry of Finance could mitigate that value nicely, just like it happened in 2008 - '(p)art of the increase in portfolio size came from a net fresh capital injection of S$10 billion from our shareholder as part of its asset allocation rebalancing' (source: Temasek Review 2008) - which would mean the portfolio increase was actually S$164 billion to S$175billion (6.7% growth) + S$10 billion.Well, I'm waiting for Temasek Review 2009 which should be out sometime next month to get the actual figures - and all the creative accounting it will contain. I'll be sure to keep you all informed on what I find then but in the meanwhile, don't make too much of the magic S$40 billion figure - focus on the S$58 billion instead as it's closer to the truth. Want to be High-Class, Don't Make Silly Spelling Mistakes NUSS The other day I received an unsolicited mailer from NUSS (National University of Singapore Society) offering a discount on their Graduate Club membership. First of all, I have no idea why they would send unsolicited mail aimlessly when they are an exclusive club and why they would, of all places, choose to target a block that is predominately filled with 3-room flats.The price to join was indicated as S$4,000 - apparently this is a bargain compared to their tariff rate of S$10,000 - which I am sure that Singaporeans tightening their belts in this recession like me would be heartened to consider. Unfortunately, the fine print looked at me disgustingly - 'only open to graduates from local & recognised foreign universities', so there was no chance for a pariah like me.But just as I was about to put the mailer onto my 'recyclable' stack, I realised something rather odd. Apparently, when you are high-class there is a different spelling system and "price incresses" instead of "price increases" (see image below).Or... it could very well be that a society/club that has no issues with mass-mailing gloss-finished postcard mailers to households who are unlikely to qualify and/or afford their memberships couldn't be bothered to hire a professional proofreader. Ferguson is a Smooth Operator Indeed Whilst reading the news on ESPN Soccernet today, I realised something interesting. David Beckham was a home-grown Manchester United player who was sold to Real Madrid for US$41 million and, at the time, I thought it was quite a gamble to sell the team's talisman and star performer. However, I realise now that Christiano Ronaldo was bought just as Beckham left and was duly given the no. 7 jersey (i.e. direct replacement?) immediately as well.Now, Ronaldo who was bought for US$20.29 million has been sold for US$132 million - a tremendously handsome profit by any standards - and again, many feel that it is quite a gamble to sell the team's current talisman and star performer. However, on closer inspection, it seems as though Federico Macheda has been earmarked to be the direct replacement for Ronaldo.By the looks of it, it seems Macheda can easily fill the void and if he rises to the heights of Beckham and Ronaldo, Ferguson - and more so the board of Machester United - can look forward to another windfall in 5 to 6 years' time.toto Joke of the Day - Asking Sales Staff to Put Heart into Work MyPaper published an article yesterday by 'uncle' Geoff Tan who must be either disillusioned or has a mischievous streak. 'Uncle' Tan called on sales staff in Singapore to put heart into their work, even if it goes unseen and I actually laughed out loud at the suggestion - bearing in mind that it is almost impossible to get staff to put in a decent enough effort even with monetary incentives in place.source: MyPaperHere was someone who was appealing to service staff's intrinsic motivation to do a good job and serve regardless of recognition - well, good luck with that then. The root of the problem is not whether local service staff want to be intrinsically motivated or not but whether they can afford to be. When the average service industry worker has a mountain of debt to repay and little time outside of work to spend with his or her family, can we really be surprised when staff look irritated the moment shoppers enter 5 minutes before closing time? Contrast that with a foreign worker who would be looking forward to just dinner and bed after work, and the implications are obvious.The Singapore climate breeds (usually immediate) punitive action against mistakes and nonchalance towards average-to-exemplary performance as a rule of thumb, so this in itself will kill any motivation to get one's hands dirty - let alone putting in any heart. Give our foreign talents 10 years' worth of the Singapore treatment and rest assured they'll give the same suspicious look at a Singapore shopper as to whether there is ITB (i.e. intention to buy).Well, it's easy when you're an eagle sitting atop a tree in the jungle to criticise the rats scurrying below for their lack in appreciating the beauty of the clouds and the sky. After all, 'uncle' Tan is 'a senior vice-president of the SPH marketing division and the general manager of SPH NewMedia for Zapcode' - my, my, what a mouthful.Besides, you just don't doubt a bald guy who comes complete with pony tail and earring, do you?source: Mobile Marketing Forum Reading Between the Lines of Local News I know, I know.... I promised to be more regular and frequent in updating my thoughts here, but projects keep falling on my lap - again, this is not a bad thing and I'm grateful to be gainfully-employed. The training industry is definitely picking up and demand is rather strong - which explains why I am mostly training/lecturing these days instead of writing/editing.Anyway, I did a quick scan of Singapore-related news on Google News this morning and a meddley of interesting articles with equally-interesting implications caught my eye. I simply had to share my take on these reports - if you could call them that, so here's my round-up of the day:1) NSF arrested for rash actST reports that the driver of the Land Rover which killed another soldier has been arrested. Well, it certainly seems to me that the authorities have quickly arranged for a scapegoat to be slaughtered to appease the public - which leads me to wonder what systemic shortcomings are going to be overlooked until the next time something like this happens.Source: Left Eye On The Media2) NUS undergrads cry foul over internshipA simply useless article that tells me that NUS Law students (well, at least one) are a bunch of whining, spoilt brats who's idea of solving a problem is to bitch about it to the press. So SMU has emerged as a credible spoiler of the monopoly that NUS had - tough.It really begs the question as to the quality of these students (at least this one) in overcoming adversity. In any case, the difference between a 'standard' law firm and a top-tier one is that at the former, you earn something like $3,000 a month doing real work whilst at the latter, you can rub shoulders with high-brow clients and earn (much) more.The article also hinted at how clueless and out-of-touch people at the top can be when the dean, Tan Cheng Han, addressed how students are 'fixated on getting internships in the large firms' by revealing that "as a law student, I personally did not spend any time as an intern in a Singapore law firm. I valued my precious vacation time and spent it on student activities and sports." I'm sure you did Prof Tan, but when was this?1987 Singapore and 2009 Singapore are totally different worlds - in case the recession has not (read: never will) hit you.Source: Cover Browser3) 7 years jail for $2m theftI remember being intrigued by this heist - impressive for such an incident to happen in a country predominately full of sheep. Of course, I was relieved to find out that the thief who dared was a Malaysian - which restores my faith in the inactive-by-default Singaporean. It is amazing to me how fast they dealt with the case though - April 12 incident, Jul 9 sentencing - a speed which I have hardly ever seen in our judicial system. In fact, I have personally witnessed the simplest of cases being dragged out for a year instead.Perhaps the efficiency here has to do with the fact that the guy managed to catch Certis Cisco (which is a 'wholly owned subsidiary of Temasek Holdings', by the way) with its stained underwear around its ankles? What makes the prosecution timeline even more impressive is that the guy initially fled to Malaysia before being caught - overseas fugitive cases should typically take longer to settle/investigate.Well, when David Rasif is still at large with $12 million in stolen wealth, I am bewildered how the '$2 million man' was quickly despatched to prison. Oh wait, Rasif ran away with some dumb sucker's money, not the government's...Source: Getty Images4) Lawyer struck off rollsSpeaking of Rasif, one of his (supposed) partners in crime - another lawyer who is in prison right now, was removed as a practising lawyer in a 10-minute 'hearing' presided by the 'Court of Three Judges'. So, in essence, everyone spent probably hours preparing/organising for what seems to be a pre-arranged decision.Next time, just send a letter and dispense with the wayang lah, thanks.Source: Climbing out of the dark Man-in-the-street Paying Back Temasek Losses? I called my friend when news broke that civil servants will not be receiving their mid-year bonus and asked him how he was coping. He replied half-jokingly that it was to be expected because the government had to recoup their investment losses somehow. I found that to be an interesting take on things and laughed together with him (me laughing harder of course as he was the one who suffered the real monetary loss).Shortly thereafter, I learnt about the Medisave Minimum Sum increase which registers the largest jump of $11,000 from the previous year as compared to a relatively modest $4,500 to $6,500 year-on-year increase in each of the preceding 5 years. Was inflation really THAT exceptionally bad in 2008/2009 as compared to 2007/2008?source: CPF BoardThen today, I learnt that house owners now have to top-up any shortfall into their CPF accounts should they sell their flats below valuation. In a nutshell, what this means is that if you had bought your flat in 1999 for say $300,000 using money from your CPF account, you would technically 'owe' $300,000 + 2.5% CPF Ordinary account interest x 10 years. That works out to $375,000 that needs to be returned to your account (assuming you bought your flat WITHOUT taking any loans). You would therefore need to sell your flat for above $375,000 before you can even think about 'earning' a profit from the sale.Consequently, if you sell your flat for anything less than this value, you can't even dream of seeing anything in cash - everything goes into the CPF account. Apparently, when you sell below the valuation (valuers are HDB appointed and IRAS licensed, by the way), you are obligated to top-up the difference between sale price and valuation back into your CPF account as well. This was reportedly 'enforced loosely' - until now.When sale prices are naturally heading southward and people in difficulty are finding themselves forced to sell their flats cheaply to save themselves, it is a mystery to me why the authorities would put such folks in a catch-22 situation - if they keep the flat, they wouldn't be able to service the loans; and they can't sell their flat either because they would be obligated to come up with cash to make up the difference (which they obviously don't have).Any which way I look at this, it seems as though only the CPF/HDB coffers will benefit - if the top-up is made, the actual financial loss of the sale is borne by the house owner (who forks it all out in cash), and if there is a default in the housing loan repayment, HDB can simply repossess the flat and resell it for a (handsome) profit.So, that brings me to ask the question, "who stands to benefit the most" and the answer seems to be an obvious CPF/HDB/Civil Service which invariably leads back to the same coffers (more or less) - Ministry of Finance, which in turn finances Temasek Holdings.In any case, it sure doesn't look as though the man in the street is in anyway a better position to deal with the current difficult financial situation - in fact, it just got worse. Uniquely Singapore: One Low IQ Boy vs Two Low EQ MPs It's a bad time for Singapore and Singaporeans, no doubt; everybody's tightening their belts - not to mention those who have no metaphorical belts to tighten in the first place. And just to break the monotony of the current recession, we have the Ultimate Fighter (Singapore version) to enjoy.In one corner we have a disgruntled, physically and mentally troubled youth who is in the midst of seeing his mother suffer physically, financially and emotionally. And in the other corner, two well-fed politicians who could hardly comprehend what life is like for a truly-poor person. A match certainly heading for catastrophe, one would imagine.Round 1 - Fight!The young man can no longer stand seeing his mother almost-grovelling to survive - over several months and being rejected unceremoniously at that, duly loses his cool and acts rashly by throwing a chair at a door. Minions being minions, overreact, restrain the youth and call in the Police. The Police seeing a politician in power being involved decide to throw out commonsense, and err on the side of absolute application of the law - they track down the young man to his home and arrest him.The politican does nothing (although a mere, "it's ok, let's forget about it" from her would have ended the incident right there and then) and possibly feels that the youth deserved what he got.Round 2 - Apology? No Thanks!Being poor and legally-helpless, the young man subsequently writes a rudimentary apology (which exemplifies his 'low IQ') to another politician delivered by his mother. This politician (exemplifying her low EQ) simply waves away the apology and practically declares he deserves his present predicament - in not so many words.Now the youth faces possible jail time, has no way of paying any fine if imposed, and will have an even harder time getting a job (which is what MP Cynthia Phua claims she was trying to do in the first place). The mother will have yet another added problem weighing down on her - as if she doesn't have enough as it is.MP Lim Hwee Hua feels the 'violence' "is not justifiable in any circumstance" but the probable fact that she has not suffered extreme financial difficulty herself disqualifies her from making that very judgement call. Perhaps in an ideal world; perhaps high atop an ivory tower, that statement may hold true - not in this case.An educated person with access to the internet can blog about his or her frustrations; a healthy person may choose to vent it out on a soccer field or basketball court. This young man probably did not have these options and it was nothing more than an outburst aimed at no one - I dare say he probably chose an area where he would specifically not harm anyone with his actions.At the end of the day, the boy can say his low IQ is a disability. Can the politicians say the same of their obviously-low EQ? VS No prizes for guessing the winner(s)Note: BTW, what's up with SPH's reporting? In the TNP report, it says the boy will be reporting back to the Police but in the ST report (another here), it says he will be attending court (both giving 12th May as the date). Also, in case the above links expire, a version of the TNP report is being carried by Singapore Enquirer. Man Utd One Game Short of Maximum for Season Yesterday, Man Utd beat Arsenal 3-1 to reach the finals of the Champions League Competition. And with it winning all the other possible trophies save the FA Cup, it would have played a total of 66 games between August and May at the season's end - which works out to something like 1 game every 4.5 days.If it had reached the FA Cup finals, this total would have been 67 - the maximum possible number of games for a Premier League club to play in one season. Contrast that figure with a club like Hull City which played about 45 games this season, and one can see the demands required of the top flight club. In fact, Liverpool, Chelsea and Arsenal have all played less than 60 games this season.As a fan, it is great to be abe to see the club I support in action so often and I am amazed at the fitness and discipline it would take as a club to achieve this feat. New And Old Citizens The Same? Don't be mistaken that there has been nothing to write over the past month that I've been missing. On the contrary, it was frustrating to see so much happen yet not have the time to pen down my thoughts.Well, today I read about how we should learn from Western culture and adopt their hospitality practices to welcome and integrate our foreigners (TODAY article). What raised my brow was that this advice (decree?) was offered by our Minitor (Minister+Mentor - to save space) who, at one point in time deemed western (specifically American) cultural influences as 'decadent' - as described in the excerpt below from the book Cultural Politics and Asian Values: The Tepid War by none other than Dr Michael Barr (bio with picture) who has written extensively on our founding father.Personally, I feel a tad annoyed with the suggestion that, "There is no difference between race, religion, new or old citizens." Really? How about the 2 years and annual 14-day-disruption-to-lifestyle that 'old' male citizens have to sacrifice serving National Service? Now, I'd call that one helluva big difference, wouldn't you? A difference that can be markedly witnessed when 'old citizens' apply for jobs, no doubt.And what's up with referring to natural-born-Singaporeans as 'old citizens' anyway? First of all, many will just assume it's in reference to senior citizens which would add unnecessary confusion. Second, the connotation is that existing Singaporeans are no longer relevant or useful - not unlike how our elderly Singaporeans are typically referred to (and treated).Granted, the Minitor (for clarification: pronounced as 'Mini-taur') was addressing a largely China-based crowd at an event for a niche audience and made these remarks in Mandarin - so it could have been coined for the target audience or the meaning may have been lost in the translation. Nevertheless, it is disappointing to read such labelling of those who call this place home (in good times and bad, mind you) and makes me as an 'old citizen' upset yet again for being Singaporean (through no fault of mine).Uniquely Singapore, I hear you say? VS In come the new...................and out go the old?sources: (left) daylife & (right) flickr Study Finds Older Men Have Stupid Children: New Insult Is Born 11 Mar 2009 - Medical News Today reports that a study (quoted below) has discovered a link between the age of the father and the intelligence of the child. The study concludes that the older the father, the lower the standard of a child's (up to 7 years) performance on cognitive tests."Advanced Paternal Age Is Associated with Impaired Neurocognitive Outcomes during Infancy and Childhood."Saha S, Barnett AG, Foldi C, Burne TH, Eyles DW, Buka SL, McGrath JJ.PLoS Medicine Vol. 6, No. 3, e40. Published online March 10, 2009 doi:10.1371/journal.pmed.1000040Bullies the world over rejoiced today as the potential for creative and novel snide remarks dawned upon them. For example, the incompetent colleague can be issued with a, "I see that your father must be about 200 years older than you" to put the point across - with scientific evidence that qualifies the statement, to boot. Similarly, for the moron who couldn't care less about others, a quip of "it must have been difficult to be born to a senior citizen" will hit the nail on the head.Practitioners of sarcasm advised though to wait until the results of the study have propogated well into the homes of the intended recipients before employing such comments. And for those who cannot wait, it would be wise to include a link to this study and report for the intended target to refer to when making such retorts.It remains to be seen how well this vein of insult will take to the masses, but with the clear advantage of being able to insult both the target AND his/her father at one go, observers believe it could very well be a winner.source: Spoon Craft Does 'Not Unhappy' = Happy? With all the internet chatter among Singaporeans on how train commuters have to constantly enjoy the whiffs emanating from fellow passengers' armpits on a regular basis - so much so that one can recognise and identify a fellow commuter by smell (are you nodding your head? Eww!) - I was surprised to read the headlines '90% of Singaporeans happy with level of graciousness' (carried in TODAY as well) and '1 out of 10 Singaporeans unhappy with current level of graciousness' in today's local news.source: IMETROIf the reports are to be believed only a mere 1 in 10 Singaporeans are unhappy with the standard of graciousness and CNA goes as far as making it sound as if the other 9 declared that they were happy. But in actual fact, the survey conducted by don't-know-who which was commissioned by the Singapore Kindness Movement, polled only 502 Singaporeans (nationality by whose definition?) and only half of them actually said they were happy. So, apart from the 50-odd folks who plainly said they were unhappy, there were about 200 who DID NOT SAY whether they were happy or unhappy.So it is misleading to suggest '90% are happy', isn't it? Once again, we get a lesson in how to have fun with statistics by using a sample size that is 0.0125% of the population and making incredible assumptions to make an erronous sweeping statement.The reports also indicate that those polled ranked Singapore fifth in a list but stops short of letting us know exactly how many were in the list of choices. For a 500-respondent survey, I wouldn't be surprised if the list only had 5 options to begin with - i.e. Singapore is placed last! Let's see if more information comes along - perhaps the Singapore Kindness Movement will publish the exact/full survey findings on its website (Note: link may be broken/down). Exclusive Interview With Mas Selamat Bin Kastari One year on and we catch up with the (in)famous 'Limping Terrorist', Mas Selamat Bin Kastari. In a secret interview held at an undisclosed location, the star of such hits as Toilet Break shared his thoughts on THE escape, his plans and his upcoming projects...G (Interviewer): So it's been a whole year and the authorities in Singapore are still searching the boots of budget cars and the storage compartments of motorcycles, hoping to find you. What do you think?MSK (Mas Selamat): Eh, betul ke [Note: is that correct]? Bike box also they search ah? I am not THAT good lah - how to hide inside such a small space.If I do, I just call my brudders activate 3 Bangla [Note: Bangladesh Nationals who are illegal immigrants], hide in 3 different cars of sama-sama [Note: same] brand and then tip off ICA. When they get the first Bangla, they will search high and low for the specific brand and let other types go without checking much.So I will hide in another type of car driven by one pakcik and makcik [Note: Uncle and Aunty] with groceries - simple. Maybe if I boring-boring, wear disguise also can jalan [Note: go] through lah!G: Interesting tactic. So was that how you left Singapore?MSK: Oi! Nice try.... Who say I already left? Singapore government ah? Not so safe if narrow down further right. That minister [Note: Wong Kan Seng] already tembah [Note: shoot] he narrow down to 2 possibilities, you still want me to reveal further? Cannot lah, must jagah [Note: protect] a bit. But can confirm that the minister was spot on with his predictions sial!G: Ok, ok, just trying our luck there to help the Singapore authorities, sorry. Well, since they have narrowed it down to 2 possibilities - one of which is where you actually are - within a short span of just one year, how safe do you feel about your status?MSK: Correct also lah. They quite fast bring down to just 2 possibilities - a bit scary. I think one more year, become one possibility already - confirm. Then must lebeh jagah diri [Note: extra protect] myself to not get caught. Hopefully they narrow down to the wrong one, then a bit safe. Otherwise Selamat must Jalan [Note: run] again, hahahaha.G: You seem quite upbeat and confident that even if they narrow down to the one correct possibility of the 2, you can still evade arrest. Why is this so?MSK: Ya lah, no problem. They already kalang-kabut [Note: confused] the other time, use all their manpower, dogs, army - still cannot find me. I think my tactics can tahan [Note: withstand] lah. I use toilet paper and extra clothing already can bypass everyone.G: So what are your plans moving forward?MSK: Good question man. My Toilet Break episode is still an icon and macam I am the most 'published' man in Singapore sial - heard my posters are still pasted at many locations. More like 'In Memory' lah - they want everyone to remember about my success ah? Sure as hell doesn't look like it is meant to alert anyone....One thing I learn from Singapore is to market knowledge and experience to other countries so I am now conducting workshops on 101 Ways To Escape With A Limp. Quite popular and a lot of people join in - criminal biasah [Note: normal], terrorists and even civil servant also. Maybe the civil servant want to jagah their rice bowl so want to learn where are the lubangs [Note: loopholes].My rates are reasonable for everyone but of course got a special discount if member of Terrorist Organisation lah - cannot forget my brudders and the past.G: I see. Sounds like the whole episode has been a blessing in disguise for your 'career'.MSK: Yah, definitely! Now, no need to worry about money matters already - set for life. Really, it is so good that I decided not to hantam [Note: hit] Singapore already lah. Don't think they will learn anything anyway - old people kena 'export', poor people asked to go [censored]-spider, you think they really care if people die? Like that, seriously no point attacking lah.Who knows, if business picks up, maybe I anonymously pledge some money for my own capture lah, hahahaha. That one will be kelakar [Note: funny] seh! Maybe I do for second year anniversary, so can keep my semangat [Note: spirit] going - good for business also.G: Interesting ideas you have. But nevertheless, you are still on many a Wanted List around the region and maybe even Interpol will be looking for you. In any case, you can never go mainstream with your business development. Any thoughts on that?MSK: True also. Too bad I cannot anyhow say 'sorry' like that minister... what's his name.... Wan Kosong? [Note: Wong Kan Seng] ... and continue with my own thing macam [Note: like] no problem. But I really like the PM style - diam-diam [Note: quiet] for dunno how long then come out and tembah [Note: shoot] one 'what to do'. Class lah, that one.As for my business, no problem lah. I am in niche market and with celebrity status, I just need to wait for people to come. Aiyah, even that minister [Note: Wong Kan Seng] don't have photo on his wiki page ok!Also, Osama is impressed with my strategies so maybe got one lubang [Note: opportunity] from his side as consultant coming up. Like that, can go Saudi or Afghanistan macam [Note: like] Foreign Talent seh. Not bad for a 'Mat' fella right?By the way, ask Jack Neo if he want to do movie on my escape lah - he can call it Toilet Sure Break or something. But must pay royalty one...G: Hahaha, yet another enterprising idea. Too bad you can't join politics in Singapore. With your popularity, poster-reach and iconic reputation, you can be a great Minister of Home Affairs! What better person to take charge than the man who exposed all the frailties of the arrogant system?MSK: Thanks for the compliment man! You like macam angkat [Note: curry favour] me because I agree to this interview sial... Anyway, politics maybe not for me. If got problem and I go into the toilet, dunno if anyone will trust me to return.G: That's a good point Mas Selamat. Well, we're coming to the end of this chat and would like to pose you a final question. What do you think will happen if you do get arrested and brought back to Singapore?MSK: Sure habis [Note: finish] one. They will lock me up and throw away the key sial. Not to mention throw one big, fat wayang to trumpet their success to the world - even if I were to be overseas and be caught by some other country's authorities and sent back.I expect they will put their best-of-the-best officers to 'look after' me and have dedicated officers to watch me round-the-clock. But one thing's for sure - they have to give me a Toilet Break...G: Ahhh, I see. A man who can escape from a toilet, will always have an opportunity! Happy Anniversary, you 'Limping Terrorist'.MSK: Thanks lah, nice to be remembered. Let my fans in Singapore know every time I go toilet and hear the tap running always remember that wonderful day lah. Brings a tear to my eye and a twitch to my limp...Mas Selamat remains a fugitive and anyone who does not doubt the authenticity of this interview really needs to check themselves into IMH - good news, they now have a bigger budget! Does ST Selectively Overlook Some News? My web browser's 'Home Page' is Google News and everytime I open my browser, I get to glance at a few headlines. Well, today the title HIV rates soar among gay men in Asia caught my eye and I wondered what bad things the world had to say about it - and how Singapore could benefit from this bad press to lambast the gay community.However, I was pleasantly surprised to see that it was actually a report that highlighted the predicament of gay men in seeking treatment for HIV/AIDS and how it is a vicious cycle of the mainstream condemning the particular community which consequently keeps its members from coming forward - which in turn results in the speread of the virus going unchecked among them.Indeed, it was a good report with regard to a HIV/AIDS seminar that was held in Hong Kong a few days ago and espoused the need for public education and proper support for the gay community instead of forcing it into hiding.The seminar heard how Australia managed to keep its HIV epidemic contained within its gay and bisexual male communities through public education and knocking down discriminatory laws.And just as I was wondering how the press in Singapore could sugar-coat this to fit into the appropriate suggestive article condemning the 'problem' of being gay, I read this gem as well.Some countries in Asia, such as Singapore, Malaysia and those in South Asia still have in place anti-sodomy laws, which are formidable barriers to people getting treatment and help, and they frustrate efforts at disease prevention, experts said."If (sodomy) is criminalised, it is a problem for doctors. What does the doctor do when someone comes in with an anal problem? He can get into trouble with the law because he is treating someone breaking the law."I laughed to myself and now look forward to how our Mainstream Media will spin this. Quite obviously, out of over 100 reports on Google News with regard to this piece of news, not one is by a Singapore-based news agency. Even Bernama of Malaysia has a report out on this - albeit diluted to exclude reference to the limiting laws on sodomy.I searched the ST and CNA websites directly and wasn't able to locate any report on this as well. I wonder if they will conveniently 'overlook' this news but anticipate a report that quotes just the figures (there HAS been a rise in HIV/AIDS cases among the men of the gay community) and then goes on to bash the community, and expect Andy Ho to be the best man for this job.Now let's see what happens...Update:I discovered that representatives from Singapore were in fact present at the conference, which makes it all the more puzzling/amazing that our dear Mainstream Media did not cover it (source: World Health Organization and Hong Kong's Department of Health). ST Going Out Of It's Way To Bullshit The Masses? I just love the way the system squeezes tighter when faced with adversity. With almost every inhabitant on this island convinced that there will be an election in the near future, our dear ST continues to waste its space (Note: arguable what waste is, of course - some saying the whole paper) with elaborate and obvious reports to suggest (tell) otherwise.Even as CNA was spotted updating its Elections Website with 'Elections 2009', ST pushed through with a painfully (IMHO) crafted report (if you could call it that) on Friday, 20th Feb 2009, to let us know...well, actually nothing.It starts with a definitive statement...VETERAN MPs from the ruling party said yesterday that the absence of a key indicator - the deployment of new faces to constituencies - suggests that a general election is not imminent....and then goes on to include a disclaimer and contradict itself in the second paragraph:Although the People's Action Party (PAP) said previously that it has identified and selected a number of potential candidates, the MPs contacted have not seen any, or many, sent out to get grassroots experience and a feel of the ground.So, the candidates have been selected already, yes? And if they have been selected, they would already have been sent on the ground right - meaning to say that they've got the grassroots experience?Also, how can there be 'not any' and 'not many' in the same sentence? That's like saying, for example, "I don't have ANY (=none) sweets or MANY (=some) sweets" - which does not make any sense. You either have some OR none, NEVER both.Next, a sound bite from the now (in)famous you-are-lesser-mortals Charles Chong is thrown in...'Usually at each election, the Prime Minister retires a third of each cohort. So you would expect to see a lot of new faces at grassroots activities,' said four-term MP Charles Chong....and of course the fact that, under the circumstances, staff renewal would hardly be a factor is not pointed out. This stating-the-obvious sound bite is then followed by another seemingly-casual yet cryptic one by a seasoned politician/lawyer Inderjit Singh: Ang Mo Kio GRC MP Inderjit Singh agreed about the importance of giving potential candidates time on the ground so they can be assessed.'I wish if they were ready, they would send in the new faces, because I've not seen any so far,' he said, with a laugh.He himself was sent to work with grassroots groups in 1994 prior to being introduced at the 1997 election.'It is rare for people to be parachuted in to stand without being put through the paces at the grassroots level,' he said. So, with his own example, we can clearly infer that potential candidates would be put on the ground years in advance. And naturally, with him being a seasoned pro, any potential candidate would not be a 'new face' as far as he is concerned, now would it.Basically, this sound bite tells us the general observations that candidates must have enough time on the ground and that it is rare for anyone to be pushed in without undergoing this process and taking into account these points, this sound bite has, in fact, zero informational value in the context of whether an election is around the corner.Next, the report points out that no one at PAP has been instructed to get ready (according to the handful of MPs queried).Another factor is the readiness of party branches, and the establishment or re-activation of election committees, led by MPs and staffed by PAP branch activists. These ensure that organisational, logistical and other needs are at the ready should an election be called. Joo Chiat MP Chan Soo Sen, Nee Soon Central MP Ong Ah Heng and Mr Singh all said their committees had yet to be re-established.Well, it could be a typo error or error-of-flow by the reporter but this paragraph quite plainly does not actually tell us if the PAP election committees were re-activated, just that they have not been (read: do not need to be?) re-established. Of course, no mention was made of the grape-vine fact that various civil servants have been asked to go for ballot-counting briefing/training in recent months.Contrastingly, the next few paragraphs talk about how ALL the opposition parties contacted (except the Workers' Party, who did not respond) are gearing up for an election, with one opposition politician suggesting specifically that it could be "as early as June".And the creme-de-le-creme of this ST report was the last few paragraphs where someone higher up the food chain was approached for a sound bite - Defence Minister Teo Chee Hean:"In any case, for the PAP, we're always working on the ground. Whether there'a an election or no election, we're always there and serving the people."Asked if he thought there would be an election, Mr Teo, who is PAP's second assistant secretary general, said: "That's purely speculative. I don't think I want to contribute to the speculation."Well, if one intends to squash speculation, he would say a definitive 'No' or 'Yes'. The minister here has obviously declined to 'contribute to the speculation' - which is effectively a 'maybe' answer. I would think my ruling government would want to tell me if there is or isn't an election instead of refusing to inform.Well, if anything at all, this report serves to inform that an election is just as likely to happen as it is unlikely to within the near future - which is where we were at before this report appeared, isn't it?For a more reasonable/sensible/honest analysis and discourse on whether an election in Singapore is probable in the next few weeks, we will have to turn to our neighbours to read The Malysian Insider - how disappointing to have to go foreign to read local. Using Sarcasm To Teach English - Survey Findings As promised, I present the findings of the survey here. Thank you to one and all who contributed to the preparation of this report.AbstractThis paper explores the feasibility of incorporating sarcasm into teaching through a limited research into teacher-perceptions. Firstly, by using the findings of research in neuroscience and language studies in relation to sarcasm, inferences are drawn to support the use of sarcasm-based lessons. Consequently, utilising the quantitative opinion of 46 education practitioners of English Language out of 62 respondents who participated in an anonymous online survey, this paper arrives at the conclusion that there is indeed strong support and good potential for such an approach. This paper recommends further research into this issue and advocates the use of sarcasm-based lessons (an example of which is annexed) in teaching.And here is the excerpt of the analysis and discussion portions of the report.Response Analysis63% of the respondents rated themselves ‘3’ or above on a scale of 5 when asked how sarcastic they considered themselves to be and when queried on the frequency with which they encountered sarcasm in the classroom, only 39.1% gave a rating of ‘3’ and above. However, a higher percentage (55.6%) of the 18 Secondary School teachers gave this rating, which suggests that this may be the level where student sarcasm is the most outward in a classroom setting. Similarly, more from this group (72.2%) rated themselves as relatively sarcastic in nature with the Junior College cohort registering the strongest at 83.3%.Among all the respondents, 5 offered qualitative responses for the open-ended question and these were largely related to the classroom management rather than language acquisition – which was to be expected. However, one respondent did explain that he or she had previously used advertisements employing sarcasm in a classroom lesson.Unsurprisingly, 91.3% of the respondents reported that they had never conducted a lesson incorporating sarcasm with only 4 individuals indicating that they had. Overall, 69.6% were open to using a sarcasm-based lesson plan themselves whilst 78.3% felt that it could be effective (rating of ‘3’ and above). The response from the Secondary School teachers was the most encouraging, with 94.4% rating the potential success of a sarcasm-based lesson as ‘3’ and above and 83.3% of them registering their support to incorporate such a lesson plan into their own teaching.Interestingly, there was a 16.6% inverse correlation between age and self-assessment of sarcasm, a 24.2% inverse correlation between age and perception of student sarcasm, and a 14% inverse correlation between age and estimation of success of a sarcasm lesson. This translates into the indication that the older the teacher is, the lower they rate their own level of sarcasm, the less sarcasm they experience (or choose to experience) from their students, and, naturally, a higher level of scepticism towards the use of a sarcasm-based lesson.DiscussionThe survey response was encouraging and the majority of the respondents felt that they would consider using a sarcasm-based lesson plan. Although the majority had not employed using such a lesson plan, they were nonetheless confident that such a lesson could achieve its objective. From the breakdown of the responses, it can further be noted that, at the very least, the Secondary level may be the most receptive to such an approach.The data suggests that Junior College teachers, although rating themselves more sarcastic than their peers at other levels, feel that a sarcasm-based approach may not be suitable (or necessary) for their students and were generally less supportive. This unexpected finding could be due to the fact that Junior College students are typically less brash and more timid than their counterparts in Secondary School.This paper however, concedes that due to the low number of respondents from the ITE, Polytechnic and tertiary institutions involved in the survey, no concrete inferences can be drawn for these teaching levels.ConclusionAs this study was specifically aimed at a general investigation across all levels, the preliminary findings suggest that a closer look at the teacher responses of each level may be warranted. A larger study comprising increased sample sizes of each teaching level would certainly shed more light on the receptiveness of using a sarcasm-based lesson and establish if the Secondary School level is indeed the most suitable for this purpose as the survey results seem to suggest.Nevertheless, this report is satisfied that its objectives have been met – namely, an awareness of such an approach was made known to at least hundreds of practitioners, the applicability of sarcasm as a language acquisition tool was demonstrated using existing research literature, and finally, a sample of the willingness of teachers to adopt such an approach was obtained.It is hoped that the research that was undertaken in this paper can be further developed to make inroads into this area of limited research and be thence consolidated with other parallel research in the fields of neuroscience and psychology such that an instructive direction can be given to education practitioners on the use of sarcasm-based teaching (an example is attached as Annexe C).The full report is also available for those interested which contains a sample lesson plan on using sarcasm to teach Context. Also, should anyone be interested to cite this report, the (APA) citation should be as below.Gangasudhan, 2009. Using Sarcasm As A Tool For Language Acquisition. Research Report (Specialist Diploma), Singapore Polytechnic. Isn't It about Time We Took Our Business Elsewhere? I've noticed something recently. Many people have forwarded me various email messages talking about the unhappiness with the way things are being run on Singapore Inc. And what's more interesting is that these people are not from the same pool of 'disgruntled' friends but are, in fact, unique individuals who have nothing else in common other than knowing me. Even casual acquaintances who are not even on the mailing list of my blog entries have passed on these criticisms to me.It seems that people all over are discontented with the disconnected government whose lack of actual concern for its people has never been more obvious than in these trying times. Today, the only legitimate leverage it had - an over-performing economy - has metaphorically gone up in smoke and it has nothing else but 'trust' and acronyms to offer. Is it any surprise that a government that ran this country like a well-oiled corporation is now helter-skelter when the gears are falling off the machinery?I was always told that the Singapore economy was 'super strong' and was the envy of the world.Good, good.And I needed to pay for it with my civil liberties?Err.. ok...But now? There is no more of the 'undeniable financial security' that our government bragged about. There is no more of the "Look here, we've done well, take this dividend *insert whatever subsidies here* and STFU about our takings (salaries), ok!".Well, the beautiful Singapore Inc is now falling apart faster than you can say 'Ponzi' and the saddest part is that we don't really have a country to fall back on. Where other countries let the businesses do the business and the government takes care of the people, our government has been (mostly) running the businesses and left the caring of the people to 'market forces' such as filial piety, passionate volunteers and philanthropists.I am scared, no doubt. But it's not the financial crisis that worries me but the fact that without the stellar performance of our economy, we have almost nothing else. Everything has been about money - not about welfare, patriotism, sentiment or (spiritual) ownership - and when you take that sole element away, then there's nothing much left, is there.That takes us to my point. When you go to an establishment and get incompetent or unsatisfactory service, what do you do? Don't you take your business elsewhere? Even if that alternative may seem slightly inferior or untested? Well, I was fine with an exorbitantly-remunerated government because they delivered but that is no longer the case. I'm afraid that the 'social contract' has been broken - the government has not held up its end of powerful economic performance year-in-year-out.What's that?How about the decades of flawless performance, I hear you say?Well, I've been taught (by this very government's philosophy) that past-performances and sentiment don't count for anything here. I've been taught that you only get to call the shots if you have money-related performance to brag about. So, right now, it's hard to take the 'management board' of Singapore Inc seriously. Without that "we've done well" halo hanging over their heads, I am not able to accept my government's display of (sudden) moral authority.I (still) hope and desperately want Singapore to be a country - where there is humanity and inevitable flaws, instead of just Singapore Inc - a heartless but perfect machine. Maybe there is no better time than the present for that change to happen with all of us living with incompetency anyway?As each day passes, I find myself thinking more and more about how Ms Sylvia Lim could lead Singapore as a country with Mr Siew Kum Hong running MOH, Mr James Gomez guiding MTI, Mr Low Thia Khiang heading MOM or Mr Chiam See Tong taking care of Foreign Affairs - perhaps then Singapore will become a country of citizens instead of an island of workers? My Dear Government, Why Do You Treat Me So? ANDAs a (second class) Singaporean, I am deeply saddened today to discover that my government is trying to enact changes to the law that will effectively give itself (too much) power in controlling the freedom of normal Singaporeans in using their camera-phones or video cameras to capture protests, acts of activism and such on film.My friend alerted me to this by exclaiming that"Will recording or filming of events which are considered illegal in law now itself be considered illegal?"and I responded by saying"I think the issue is with the 'live' streaming of films and not video recording per se. It would not be feasible to ban the recording of illegal events altogether because this would effect media reporting as well..."He then replied with further information saying"...it seemed to say that this amendment was going to give powers for police to confiscate the cameras or stop the filming of protests by people who were not journalists by profession."I thought to myself, this was quite alarming and distatseful if it were to be the case - but I still did not believe it could be true. So I went searching for the original documentation on these changes and relied on the Singapore Statutes Online and the Films (Amendment) Bill as posted on the Singapore Parliament website.Of the 3 changes that have been proposed in the bill (a local copy on my server, just in case), 2 are merely cosmetic changes (IMHO) which allow for an advisory board to influence decisions (section 4) and paraphrasing the section to allow for more comprehensiveness (Section 26).The (shocking) point of contention, however, for me is the 3rd proposed change which refers to the definition and interpretation as per the provisions under the Films Act (Chapter 107), Section 2:2-(2) For the purposes of this Act, a film is directed towards a political end in Singapore if the film —(a) contains wholly or partly any matter which is intended or likely to affect voting in any election or national referendum in Singapore;(b) contains wholly or partly either partisan or biased references to or comments on any political matter, including but not limited to any of the following:(i) an election or a national referendum in Singapore;(ii) a candidate or group of candidates in an election;(iii) an issue submitted or otherwise before electors in an election or a national referendum in Singapore;(iv) the Government or a previous Government or the opposition to the Government or previous Government;(v) a Member of Parliament;(vi) a current policy of the Government or an issue of public controversy in Singapore; or(vii) a political party in Singapore or any body whose objects relate wholly or mainly to politics in Singapore, or any branch of such party or body.2-(3) For the avoidance of doubt, any film which is made solely for the purpose of(a) reporting of current events; or(b) informing or educating persons on the procedures and polling times for any election or national referendum in Singapore,is not a party political film.After (and not if) the changes have been implemented, this section will read as follows (changes in red):2-(2) For the purposes of this Act, a film is directed towards a political end in Singapore if the film —(a) contains wholly or partly any matter which, in the opinion of the Board, is intended or likely to affect voting in any election or national referendum in Singapore;(b) contains wholly or partly references to or comments on any political matter which, in the opinion of the Board, are either partisan or biased; and any "political matter" includes but is not limited to any of the following:(i) an election or a national referendum in Singapore;(ii) a candidate or group of candidates in an election;(iii) an issue submitted or otherwise before electors in an election or a national referendum in Singapore;(iv) the Government or a previous Government or the opposition to the Government or previous Government;(v) a Member of Parliament;(vi) a current policy of the Government or an issue of public controversy in Singapore; or(vii) a political party in Singapore or any body whose objects relate wholly or mainly to politics in Singapore, or any branch of such party or body. The most critical change of all is Section 2-3(a) which changes from 'reporting of current events' to '...reporting of news by a broadcasting service licenced under any written law'. This in itself places anyone filming an 'illegal event' who does not have a press pass in the cross hairs of the authorities (which include the Police) who, under Section 34 of this act, can search and seize any film and equipment used.Subsequently (upon conviction) such equipment and film 'shall be forfeited and shall be destroyed or otherwise disposed of in such manner as the Minister may direct' as well.I am deeply saddened that in the proposed Bill, where explanations and justifications were provided for all the changes, this critical change was explained away as the expansion of the original list without referring to the change in terminology - ayone can report on current affairs but only a select few may be part of 'a broadcasting service licenced by any law'.It seems as though this telling change is being sneaked in without any forthright explanation. Honestly, I cannot accept the change or the manner in which it has been included. As far as I am concerned, it is truly a sad day for Singapore as a modern city when (and not if) this section comes into play.Then, not only will protesting be illegal, so will filming it. My God! What's next? Turning your head to glance becomes an offence? Or will reading the placard/banner/t-shirt lead to being indefinitely detained under the ISA?*This article has been featured**This article has been featured* Of Dragons And Shopping Centres... Am I the only one who finds the (alleged) donation of a hanged murderer's kidney to a rich tycoon a little bit too convenient? The plot of this story is quite incredible and worthy of a drama movie, IMHO.1) Rich tycoon convicted of buying organs gets an unexpected second chance2) Cold-blooded murderer turns good at moment of deathHowever, the obvious doubts that come to my mind are:a) Since a rich man with abundant wealth at his disposal that enables him to make all sorts of clandestine arrangements if he so wishes, is involved, AND who has been convicted of buying a kidney, to boot; shouldn't the authorities look at this very closely and find out if any compensation was (or will be) made?b) The 'one-eyed dragon' was obviously a person of ill-repute (as far as reports in the press portray him) and someone who was trying to stay alive (evidenced by his appeal for clemency). Isn't it (too) extremely remarkable for such a person, who couldn't care less about someone's life (ie. the person he murdered) to turn around and be suddenly altruistic at the moment of death (allegedly without any coercion)?c) Why did the 'dragon' choose the tycoon anyway?Under these circumstances, it is hard not to think that the tycoon who has demonstrated that he is not beyond using his wealth to try anything and everything, might have offered some sort of compensation in order for the murderer's 2 young children to be well taken care of.I wonder if 2 or 3 years down the road a trust fund is set up for the children, would that be illegal - or explained away as an act of altruism? Or can the law be circumvented to suggest that it is not an offence to provide compensation to the dead donor's family?Unless there is some form of disclosure to address these doubts and concerns, there is no way to rectify these negative speculations, is there? I , for one, cannot accept things at face value and cannot simply take the word of the tycoon, or the family of the donor.Honestly, I would like to see some investigation being done that exonerates the tycoon of this speculation and also the legal undertaking by both parties that any money that may be handed over from the tycoon to the donor's family will be seized. Only then can there be fairness to all those un-tycoon kidney patients who equally desire to live. Otherwise, this episode only demonstrates that those with money at their disposal are 'more equal' than others, doesn't it?Now, There's a Little Bit of Dragon in Tangs*This article has been featured* How Stupid Do You Think I Am? No, Seriously... I received this poster on the new EZLink card in an email today. In it, there was a proclamation that no deposit was necessary. Naturally, I thought to myself - huh, how could they sustain this without a card deposit in money-mad, errr... greedy, errr... profit-driven Singapore.Then, on closer inspection, I discovered it was the TRAVEL DEPOSIT they were talking about. Ohhh... The $5 'cost-of-the-card' fee still applies but the $3 holding amount is no more? Good news then.But what? I have to maintain a $3 minimum balance now? That means on the old card I can still travel with 10 cents' value but now I need $3.10 instead? So in effect, the $3 Travel Deposit STILL applies lah - it's just that it will be reflected in the actual stored value (ie. gives you the impression you have more money than you are actually allowed to use)...So, basically, for the old card, you go to the counter, hand over $15 and receive your card with a stored value of $7, ALL of which you can use for travel. Now, for the new card, you go to the counter, hand over $15 and receive your card which SHOWS $10 but of which you can use only $7. The difference is whether you SEE the $3 Travel Deposit or not.Sheesh! Come on EZLink, don't spin this as a gimmick. Just say it as it is - $3 Travel Deposit Now Changed To $3 Minimum Balance. Don't insult my intelligence with crap notices like these, ok?But wait, there's more! (*like a late-night informercial*)This $3 minimum balance only applies for MRT travel? The minimum balance for bus travel fluctuates depending on where I get on and where the service ends? Wow, this just gets better doesn't it.Now, I would like to see how many commuters are going to be left stranded when they change buses only to discover that they don't have enough value left to take the next bus and continue on their journey...Happy New Year Everyone*This article has been quoted* Survey on Using Sarcasm to Teach English As some of you might know, I am pursuing a post-grad Specialist Diploma in English Language Teaching at Singapore Polytechnic. Well, as part of the course requirements, I am to conduct a small research exercise, and I have decided to explore the possibility of designing lessons that incorporate sarcasm as a teaching tool.As part of the research, I am conducting a survey to find out how many English language teachers are aware of using sarcasm as a teaching tool, whether they have done so, and, if they would consider using a lesson design provided to them that uses sarcasm to teach.The survey is a 9-question MCQ one, and will take probably 30 seconds to a minute to complete. I would like to ask all those who have taught English Language at any level to attempt the survey and humbly request all of you to forward this email to others as well. The survey can be accessed at the following link: http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.aspx?sm=qFacnnFfir_2f9cAocMYSasQ_3d_3d I am aiming for about 100 responses at least but if I can get more, then it will make the data look that much more impressive. As part of the research I'll be creating sample lessons designed around the element of sarcasm, and I will share them on my blog (as well as the results of the survey, of course) for everyone and anyone to use as necessary. I sincerely believe a lesson that employs sarcasm as part of the design can be incredibly fun - for both the teacher and the students, whilst being very effective as well.Thank you so much for the help, take care, and Happy New Year! Another Act of Defiance? Images of Kangaroos Plastered Indiscriminately... Gosh! It's been over a month since I last updated - I really need to be more regular than that. Also, sorry for the site being down for the last few days - apparently traffic had exceeded the monthly bandwidth limit (not necessarily a bad thing).Anyway, I was out last Friday to have dinner with our friends and whilst parking at Suntec City, I saw something so vile and disgusting, it riveted me. With the latest decree being that images of Kangaroos are clandestine and representative of all things vulgar (evidenced by the persecutio.. err, I mean prosecution of the 3 activists recently), I was certainly appalled at the anti-establishment behaviour of the Suntec City Management.Here they were, plastering the pillars of the carpark with images of kangaroos all over! This can only mean that they are implying that the pillars of our society are corrupt! How could this go unpunished? Especially when the 3 activists were jailed for merely illustrating their opinions.Oh, the outrage...I hope the authorities will shut down the Suntec City basement carpark immediately, cordon off the area and issue a cease-and-desist order on Suntec City so that they can do the morally correct thing and change all these obscene images to that of the Merlion. The Game of Sabotage As for the second workshop I conducted just last Friday, the objective was to create awareness of the different types of audience one can encounter when giving a presentation and how he or she can handle them. Faced with only a 30 to 45 minute timeslot, I decided to keep the workshop simple and incorporate as much elements into a single activity as possible.For the purposes of their understanding, I limited the audience-type to 4 broad categories (Hostile, Hijacker, Heckler, Impatient). I began the lesson at a relatively fast pace and started with the activity first. I asked the students to 'sabo' 2 of their classmates to read out a passage (incidentally about having enthusiasm in presentation). Once this was done, I passed around Index Cards (my favourite tool) to all the students with 4 of them having instructions to roleplay the 4 audience types and the rest being blank cards to keep the 2 readers unaware.I asked the reading of the passage to begin and as it progressed the audience 'reacted' according to their roles. The readers managed to complete their task successfully and I asked them to point out the interfering audience members and the corresponding type that they were. I then asked these 4 roleplaying members of the audience to read out the justification for their behaviour (all plausible explanations of redeeming value) that were indicated on their index cards and asked the 2 readers if they felt as strongly about these disruptive individuals. Unsurprisingly, they were not as annoyed (albeit in a light-hearted manner) having known the reason behind the behaviour.I then proceeded to the second round of the exercise which entailed inviting the 2 'sabo-ed' students to nominate one of their classmates to re-read the passage. The students once again had a fun time selecting the next 'victim' who duly took up his position. The students were again passed around index cards but this time, the instruction was targetted at all the students in order for them to act as a group.Once the student began reading, I signalled from behind the reader for the class to either go "OHHH!" or start applauding. Although the student reading was caught off-guard by the reaction of the audience, he nevertheless maintained his composure and completed the task. I talked to the reader and confirmed with him that although he was expecting some interruptions as in the previous round, he did not quite expect the whole class to react.I then proceeded to explain to the class the value of awareness, preparedness and focusing on the positives when identifying various audience-types. Finally, to reiterate the learning objectives as well as to assess their level of awareness, I furnished a simple worksheet to them in which they were to offer reasons that could explain the behaviour of the 4 audience types that were identified earlier. Each student was asked to complete the worksheet individually and all were collected. It was apparent that the students had been put in the right frame of mind and the following is a snapshot of one student's response that represents the class'.Although this was hardly an in-depth workshop (limited due to the short amount of time), the essence of the lesson was communicated quite effectively and the students enjoyed their time in spite of it all being rushed (completed in 35 minutes).In any case, I will be following up this workshop with another supplementary one in January for the same class, so this will give an excellent platform to extend the subject matter in detail. The Analogy Exercise Well I conducted another 2 workshops at Singapore Polytechnic over the last 2 weeks and thought of sharing the lesson approach as several of my readers mentioned that they benefitted from the description of the previous workshop (Index Card Lesson) that I conducted.As most of you might already know, I engineer creative lessons which get the students engaged in a fun activity, and these 2 latest workshops were no different. For the second workshop in the series (the next one after the Index Card Lesson), the objective was to inculcate the awareness and importance of structure when preparing presentations for clients.The students needed to understand that not everything in the documentation ends up in the presentation and consequently also needed practice in sieving out the vital information to be presented as well.After some thought, I came up with a simple idea that could help the students assess their projects in a different perspective whilst addressing the above needs. I created an activity in which the students would explain their project using an analogy. The basic premise was that the students would need to consider their project details and extract the key points to be translated into a description of a sport.The analogy would limit the amount of info that could be brought over from the project specifications into the sport elements and it would also give the students an opportunity to visualise their projects in a different context.I scaffolded the task, giving a structured example for their understanding of what was to be done and then allowed their creativity and sense of adventure take over. The students did not disappoint and the following are the analogies as presented by the 5 groups of students (click on image to read the students' work).The students had a good time preparing the analogies and then the fun experience of sharing their analogies (lots of laughs here). And as can be clearly seen from the descriptions, they were able to think out of the box and produce quite interesting analogies overall. Excuse Me, Are You Deceased? I subscribe to a survey portal called AIP Online Surveys where I do a few surveys occasionally when I am invited to, after which they give me some reward (using a points system). Well, I have encountered quite a number of errors - of grammar, language, and even logic at times - over the years but today's is the most hilarious that I've come across - so far.A survey about 'Lifestyle', the questionnaire asked general questions on how often I travelled, my age (2 times - ??) , and familiarity with brands of cars, among other things. However, the question that really blew me away was the following, which I can only assume was asking if I was a widower. But before I arrived at this conclusion, the first thing that popped into my mind was - "how can a deceased person be taking this survey?"... The 'Index Card' Creativity Lesson I conducted a workshop at Singapore Polytechnic today on incorporating visuals into presentation and, as part of the workshop, I produced an activity to get the students to create visual representations of issues close to their hearts. As the activity was well received, I thought it would be useful to share the idea with everyone.Basically, the concept was inspired by a blog I read fairly regularly entitled Indexed. Adapting that idea of reducing various issues onto index card visuals, I got the students to group together and come up with the visuals on index cards supplied to them. After a bit of hesitation, the students really got going and came up with the following visuals...Group 1 (above) included students who were quite lateral thinking (front row is an indicator perhaps?) and they used rulers to draw their graphs. The Venn Diagram (Enjoy Life) was interesting and the second visual was quite straightforward (age/maturity) - which I suggested could be turned into a bell curve to suggest that after a certain age, you become less mature (senile). The first visual above (trouble/women) was indeed humorous but as we discussed, all of us realised that it could be interpreted as (a) more women would translate into more problems, and as (b) when there is more trouble, you'd need more women to solve it!Group 2 (above) included 3 quiet male students and they came up with pretty straightforward visuals on the facts of life (hair mass, drug addicition, travelling time, saying the wrong things).Group 3 (above) comprised good-natured students who were more extroverted and naturally, their visuals reflected their off-beat humour. Interestingly, the trouble/teacher visual was similar to the trouble/women visual of the earlier group. Likewise, the interpretation that more teachers would be required when there was more trouble was suggested as an alternative here as well.Group 4 (above) obviously explored the depth of the task and produced some creative visuals that told stories. Although the first visual seems abstract and arbitrary, the student was able to justify his creation by suggesting that it represented himself exorcising the evil elements of society. As for the other 2 visuals, the level of frustration and meaning was evident in their detail.Group 5 (above) was relatively enthusiastic about the exercise and asked a few questions before embarking on their preparation. Notably, the theme was to communicate to the teacher/tutor the difficulties in getting to class (first visual - crowded train, 8pm timing) and to preferably keep lessons short (second visual - attention span/length of lecture). The final visual was an interesting play of using equations to 'logically' suggest that studying would lead to failure!All in all, the students enjoyed the exercise and watching one another's creations being showcased (a Visualiser was used to flash the index cards on-screen). At the same time, the overall class response as each visual was flashed showed the students how some of the visuals did not create the intended impact, others were open to interpretation, and a few were remarkably funny, poignant and meaningful.After everyone had a hearty laugh at the series of index cards, I linked back the lesson to the fundamentals of selecting visuals which had been discussed before the activity was conducted. Thus, the students were able to appreciate how these points came into play through the process of the activity.I find that this activity can also be used to elicit thoughts, frustrations, opinions and ideas as it forces students to think of the relationships involved in various issues. Although this exercise was conducted in relation to a topic involving the use of visuals in presentation, it can just as easily be used as a means to generate content for a specific issue or agenda.A point to note though is that for lower level students who may not understand how to reduce issues into such visual relationships, there might be a need to do 2 iterations of this exercise - a first round where they will learn how to create this type of visuals (by making mistakes and learning the process), and then the second round proper where they can incorporate creativity and purpose into the exercise to produce meaningful visuals.Well, have fun using this little exercise and do leave a note here to let me know how it went for you, cheers! Halimah Gets Featured In Sunday Times I was meaning to include a note about my wife's appearance in the Sunday Lifestyle a couple of weeks ago (on a good friend's birthday, in fact) and so here it is. Well, she was featured in the section Singapore Cooks for her Vegan Briyani recipe and the report included quite a large picture of her as well. Needless to say, I am extremely proud of her.More lovely pictures of her culinary works of art are available on her blog, and if you like, you could also support her online vegan bakery (as good as the real thing, by the way). A Lesson In Statistics From ST Wow, it's been a month already - how time flies when you're having fun.In today's Straits Times, I came across an article on Page 2 of the Home Section that raised my eyebrows - 1.44 Million Read ST screamed the headline (note: this link will be dead if you're reading this more than a week after this entry was made - so you can read the PDF snapshot of the article here). I thought to myself, so 1.44 million readers actually bothered to contact ST to tell them so, not bad. I was further intrigued to find out how this feat of contacting 1.44 million people was done - especially since I was not contacted myself about this, and duly read the article.Well, what actually happened was this - the Nielson Media Index 2008 was released yesterday or the day before. This Index uses a 'face-to-face survey' of 4,700 persons over the age of 15 to gather information and subsequently reports this finding (ie. how many feel this, how many agree with that etc.) through the Index. And in this Index (which I can't find and suspect must buy to read), the ST was quoted as being read by 39% of those surveyed - ie. 1,833 of the 4,700 persons said they read the ST.Apparently, in last year's report (Nielson Media Index 2007), this percentage was quoted as 37.9%. So, using 39% - 37.9% = 1.1%, the real difference between the 2 years would be more or less 52 persons (1.1% of 4,700). However, this percentage could have also been reached if there had simply been more total respondents to begin with - ie. 1,833 of 4,836 = 37.9%. So, if there had been just 136 more persons surveyed last year as compared to this year, this 'increase' would not be an increase after all.Interesting right? It gets better. The 1.44 million figure is 39% of 3.69 million 'consumers' (roughly 80% of the population since the survey was only for those aged 15 and older). The actual corresponding numerical figure for this 39% is 1,833 persons, which means each person in the survey acted on behalf of 784 other 'consumers'. Therefore, the '105,000 more readers' translates to just 133 real survey respondents.Hey, the actual numbers don't seem as impressive, I hear you say? Well, that's the idea, isn't it? Instead of reporting the facts outright, the suggestive figures were reported glamourously. Any survey is only indicative with nothing to laud about, and even though 4,700 persons may very well be a large sample size, it is only representative of 0.12% of the intended target (that's LESS THAN ONE PERCENT mind you).What would have been a better approach (better for the independent understanding of the reader that is) would be stating the respondent size (4,700) followed by just the percentage and/or respondent figures for each category (eg. 'ST readers comprised 39% or 1,833 of the respondents' and so on). Extrapolating the figures is for dramatic effect only and therefore should have been limited to a one-liner somewhere in the middle of the article.Well, this concludes the lesson from ST. Remember, now you can just find any 100 strangers at Orchard Road, give them a sweet or freebie, then ask them to answer the question "Do you think I am a nice person?", collate the figure (which would be a 'yes' for almost all), get an official figure on shoppers at Orchard Road from somewhere (which should be in the millions), and finally proclaim, 'XXX is Liked by Millions of Shoppers at Orchard Road!' - ie. 90+% extrapolated to cover that official figure on shoppers.I sincerely hope to find the Nielsen Media Index and have a look at it and also study the methodology used. But I am pretty sure that no one in the 4,700 respondents was a homeless person, an old aunty or uncle wiping tables, a person serving jail time, or a person at IMH. But of course the 1.44 million figure includes such persons by default.Well, if anyone can point me to the source of these findings, please inform me so that I can update this entry with that information, thank you. In the meanwhile, do have fun manipulating statistical figures to make yourself look good. Singapore Reality in Hell Boy 2? The lack of proper updates during the past 3 weeks is largely due to the current projects on my plate coupled with the preparation of the necesary administrative details with regard to the release of my new book.Well, recently I had the chance to watch Hell Boy 2 and although the movie itself was not that fantastic, an idea struck me when I saw one scene where the characters spoke a fictional language. The scene itself dealt with an issue somewhat similar to Singapore's political climate and I naturally felt it would make for some good satire.Basically, the idea bore out of the ERP-Hitler Spoof that was circulated around not long ago. I managed to get a clip of the original scene and went about creating a 'Singaporean perspective' of the scene. I do think it makes for a good laugh and hope you agree. Of course, you might simply find this lame and if so, I'm terribly sorry.I do hope you enjoy this at least somewhat and perhaps I will have a chance to do more of the same - it's pretty fun to create... The 'Unofficial' Police Handbook Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you my first book - The 'Unofficial' Police Handbook. 3 years in the making - on top of my other projects, I have completed my 60-page insight on the elements of being a Police Officer. Meant to be both readable and informative to the layman whilst being exciting to fellow officers, I sincerely hope that it is accepted by one and all.The E-Book preview contains the Preface, Chapter 1 and Chapter 9 (closing chapter) in full, so I hope that it gives a good overall indication of how good (or bad) the book is. After much research, I have decided to price the book between S$8 and S$10 - depending on the final cost of printing and marketing. However, I will be taking pre-orders for the book at S$7 a copy with the print release date set on (or before) 1st October 2008. Please drop me an email via the email link on the left or drop me an SMS at 90602206 to place your orders.I encourage everyone to read the preview first and decide for yourself if it is worth your money to buy and read it. As those who know me would attest, it is not my style to ask anyone to 'support' this endeavour by buying the book for the sole reason of knowing me. I only ask the small favour of adding your opinion of the preview in the comments section of this entry - be they good or bad.Front CoverBack Coverclick icon for e-book preview Singapore Dissident Goes Awry? As my 'regular reads' list on the left column testifies, I (used to) enjoy reading Mr Gopalan Nair's entries regarding the state of Singapore politics. I chanced upon his blog at least a year or two ago and have been reading his thoughts regularly, long before the ongoing debacle in Singapore occurred.Although I felt it was unnecessary for him to come into Singapore and invite trouble in the first place, I felt that is was either a case of extreme silliness or political bravery - and very possibly a potent mix of both. I was not sure if his motivations were personal or patriotic but was willing to give him the benefit of the doubt notwithstanding.As most of my readers know, I was formerly in the Police Force for 10 years and was attached to the Central Police Division for the duration of my career. For a major part of those 10 years, I was doing much work at the Little India vicinity by way of various assignments. I was therefore naturally tickled when Mr Nair chose to stay at the Broadway Hotel along Serangoon Road upon his arrival and even more intrigued when he was arrested for Disorderly Behaviour within that jurisdiction.I immediately checked with Mr Nair's version on his blog, Singapore Dissident, and he claimed to have been followed and persecuted. I thought perhaps some ISD officers had been tracking his movements which led to the scuffle and subsequent arrest. However, a few days later, I happened to chat with one of my ex-colleagues and was told that he was actually arrested by 'normal' officers who were doing routine plainclothes patrol that night. In fact, some of the officers who arrested him are known to me personally.I was informed that these officers did not know who Mr Nair was until he was brought back to the Police station. I have no reason to disbelieve this as I know that the officers involved are not that much interested in the (opposition) political climate - unless of course they are tasked to perform duties with regard to 'demonstrations', in which case they curse and swear.That being the case, it is very highly probable that Mr Nair WOULD NOT have been arrested had the officers recognised who he was. I am certain that he was not singled out and had, on his own accord, invited trouble by banging on the bonnet of the Police car. In usual cases (from personal experience as well), Police Officers try to give the benefit of the doubt to abusive drunkards simply because; a) they are more of a nuisance than being criminals, and; b) they are a handful until they sober up - being a nuisance from arrest to lock-up till they eventually sober up. Not to mention, somewhere along the line, they will throw up (ie. vomit) and compound matters for evryone involved.In Mr Nair's case, the level of tolerance would have been (much) higher had the officers known who he was from the beginning of the incident. Of course, this is not to say that he would not have gotten himself arrested anyway with his antics eventually. I would even go as far as to say that he must have been extremely violent and aggressive to have 'forced' the officers into arresting him.Personally, I feel disappointed that he would choose to provoke officers and invite trouble for himself. In his latest entry regarding the ensuing court case, he also speaks of the court officials being reluctant to identify their full names. Although I find this immaterial to the matter of the case itself, he mentions the investigator, Mr S Vickneshwaran, using a false name, S Vicki. I have personally known this officer since 1995 and he has always gone by the name 'Vicki'. In fact, there is only one officer 'Vicky' in the whole of Central Police Division (more so for 'S Vicky') and it is definitely not a 'completely false name' as alleged by Mr Nair in that entry.At best, he is nitpicking with regard to this issue and, at worst, he is intentionally disrupting proccedings with a sideshow. I am again disappointed with this behaviour which he could and should avoid. As things progress, I find that, overall, he is drumming up things unnecessarily and then claiming to be persecuted.These officers are restricted by the OSA (Official Secrets Act) and will not be able to defend themselves directly unlike Mr Nair who can post everything on his blog. Although I am not fond of things as they are in Singapore, I refuse to just stand by and watch my friends and ex-colleagues, who are honest tax-payers themselves, and who perform their jobs with dignity and honour, be subjected to such unfounded accusations and baseless distortions of the truth.The purpose of this post is to let everyone see the other side of the coin with regard to the Disorderly Behaviour incident involving Mr Gopalan Nair. The facts stated herein are as good as hearing from the officers involved themselves, thank you.Mr Gopalan Nair (left) & Rochor NPC (right) - Where I Was Last Posted