Matchmaking Session Part III Another mail from my boss, the matchmaker: Hi [insert my name here], Pl arrange to meet Mathew. He is probably an old guy. =( Rgds, S HAIyah. Maybe this is all part of the employee’s uhh. welfare scheme. P/s: Yes, I know there’s a missing part II. To Sleep A flock of sheep that leisurely pass by One after one; the sound of rain, and bees Murmuring; the fall of rivers, winds and seas, Smooth fields, white sheets of water, and pure sky; I’ve thought of all by turns, and still I lie Sleepless; and soon the small birds’ melodies Must hear, first uttered from my orchard trees, And the first cuckoo’s melancholy cry. Even thus last night, and two nights more I lay, And could not win thee, Sleep! by any stealth: So do not let me wear tonight away: Without Thee what is all the morning’s wealth? Come, blessed barrier between day and day, Dear mother of fresh thoughts and joyous health! - William Wordsworth Bone-weary tiredness. If only I can have 1 3 nights of 8-hourly-per-night deep, uninterrupted, dreamless sleep… Roommates from InsertChoiceWordHere Before I engage in The Adventures of starm|st and mangO in the Day-Time, here’s a little sidetrack of The Curious Incidents of starm|st and mangO in the Night-Time in Osaka, our last stop for the Japan trip. Sister and I stayed in a dorm room [with two other people] at Shin-Osaka Youth Hostel on our first night in Osaka. Needless to say, we came out of it scarred for life. (more…) Protected: Frustrations This post is password protected. To view it please enter your password below: Password: I Been feeling moody and restless lately [at most times anyway]. So I want some wings to fly and soar, yet invisible strings of the blood pull me back, coldly, chillingly; choking and crippling me, again and again this cycle repeats and I am tired of it, pray tell me will you let me breathe on my own? So I want world enough and time, but time moves of its own accord, not waiting, not hesitating for anyone anything, the world spins, not of wanting, not of any care, so leaving people like me standing still in the whirlwind of movements. So I want to shed the layers til I can find my core again, and upon seeing a notice for a possibility to work towards that but of limited time to apply, I called them instead but was cut down on the spot [and the next will be two years later], not intentionally cruelly but still cruel to my ever-seeking mind. So I want to mean something more, like maybe a significant piece of the heart, or a mite of the soul, maybe a slice of the laughter, a touch in the important bits of life; but it is not so, not time yet perhaps, and I know things should not be rushed for now, so here I hide in the shadows. Again, everytime. *kesian* I need a holiday. So. I’m going on a holiday. Tomorrow. Bye. It’s in the Little Things it’s in the little things. it’s the little things.. that makes me smile. the little kisses planted on my forehead, whenever. anecodes about his friends and hilarious things that they do. when he said i want to learn about the things you dislike, not just the things you like. how his grip never loosen from my fingers even though he was fast asleep [and thus i couldn’t turn on other side when i’d wanted to]. oh-so-heartmelting. it’s the little things.. that catches me off-balanced. spontaneous grocery and sangria shopping at holland v late at night. the camaraderie and dynamics of the house; 7 people [including me] around doing their own things, yet never leaving anyone totally out. her asking me to join the group for her wedding in december even though that was only the second time she met me. them inviting me up and offering chocolate milkshake with baileys and dragonfruit vodka [uh huh uh huh] at random timings. oh-so-naturally. it’s the little things.. that ping my heart. when he looked into my eyes and said you’re still you it doesn’t change anything after i told him my ’secret’. coffee in the morning, and homecooked dinner in the evening. the but i like your hair even though it was wildly mused up and all sadako-ish. calling and talking to me until i was safely home even though he was that close to falling asleep. oh-so-sweet. it’s in the little things. /sappy One of Those Days You Should Play the Piano You are a true music aficionado who loves many musical style and eras. You find music to be an escape. And you’d like to be relaxed and comfortable when you’re making it. You’re very innovative, and you have a unique way of knowing what may sound beautiful. There’s a strong possibility that you could compose some of your own work songs quite easily. While you have a lot of creative energy, you are also serious and conscientious. Your musical talent needs time, practice, and lots of privacy to flourish. Your dominant personality characteristic: your painstaking attention to detail Your secondary personality characteristic: your natural tendency to be whimsical What Musical Instrument Should You Play? Redemption for all the things that I did wrong, against all the good that I have done, do they balance out? or is it not enough, never enough to redeem myself? It’s in the Little Things it’s in the little things. it’s the little things.. that makes me smile. the little kisses planted on my forehead, whenever. anecodes about his friends and hilarious things that they do. when he said i want to learn about the things you dislike, not just the things you like. how his grip never loosen from my fingers even though he was fast asleep [and thus i couldn’t turn on other side when i’d wanted to]. oh-so-heartmelting. it’s the little things.. that catches me off-balanced. spontaneous grocery and sangria shopping at holland v late at night. the camaraderie and dynamics of the house; 7 people [including me] around doing their own things, yet never leaving anyone totally out. her asking me to join the group for her wedding in december even though that was only the second time she met me. them inviting me up and offering chocolate milkshake with baileys and dragonfruit vodka [uh huh uh huh] at random timings. oh-so-naturally. it’s the little things.. that ping my heart. when he looked into my eyes and said you’re still you it doesn’t change anything after i told him my ’secret’. coffee in the morning, and homecooked dinner in the evening. the but i like your hair even though it was wildly mused up and all sadako-ish. calling and talking to me until i was safely home even though he was that close to falling asleep. oh-so-sweet. it’s in the little things. /sappy [Not My Best But] It Doesn’t Have to Be Anything it doesn’t have to be anything. it can just be the sound of your laughter, thrown in the air; natural and unsuppressed, the way your eyes crinkle up with joy, how you place your head against your arm on the table, shoulders shaking uncontrollably with mirth when something tickles your funny bone. it doesn’t have to be anything. it can just be the quickness in which you play along and rebut my exaggerated sarcastic statements with yours, or how you attempt to speak in the language which you were not taught [not too badly, if i might say], the helpless S.O.S signals you sent me when Miss Host rattled on in the foreign language, oblivious to our.. deficiency in it. it can also be hearing your gentle calming voice over the line, and the smile that comes along with it.  it doesn’t have to be anything. it can just be the way you look from across the table, or how you busy yourself with your mobile; fingers flying nimbly across the screen. it can be you cooking our dinner at home; concentrating hard on the task at hand, head bent, eyes on the frying pan, or you making coffee for us in the morning. it doesn’t have to be anything. it can just be how you let me meet the group[s] and were unafraid of showing affection; you do not hide and keep me in the shadows. it can be the way you hum and sing in my presence, or how your eyes pierce mine when we dance, or the little actions you do almost unconsciously. it can be you being serious and sharing when i really need you to; it calms my paper-mache core, or you apologising to me for the lack-of-flower-giving when you noticed a bouquet on a table near us, or you chasing me halfway up the stairs to send me to my doorstep. it doesnt have to be anything…  Tree Leaf Wind Leaf departure is because of Wind pursuit. Or because Tree didn’t ask her to stay… - Unknown  [Not My Best But] It Doesn’t Have to Be Anything it doesn’t have to be anything. it can just be the sound of your laughter, thrown in the air; natural and unsuppressed, the way your eyes crinkle up with joy, how you place your head against your arm on the table, shoulders shaking uncontrollably with mirth when something tickles your funny bone. it doesn’t have to be anything. it can just be the quickness in which you play along and rebut my exaggerated sarcastic statements with yours, or how you attempt to speak in the language which you were not taught [not too badly, if i might say], the helpless S.O.S signals you sent me when Miss Host rattled on in the foreign language, oblivious to our.. deficiency in it. it can also be hearing your gentle calming voice over the line, and the smile that comes along with it.  it doesn’t have to be anything. it can just be the way you look from across the table, or how you busy yourself with your mobile; fingers flying nimbly across the screen. it can be you cooking our dinner at home; concentrating hard on the task at hand, head bent, eyes on the frying pan, or you making coffee for us in the morning. it doesn’t have to be anything. it can just be how you let me meet the group[s] and were unafraid of showing affection; you do not hide and keep me in the shadows [to a certain extent i guess]. it can be the way you hum and sing in my presence, or how your eyes pierce mine when we dance, or the little actions you do almost unconsciously. it can be you being serious and sharing when i really need you to; it calms my paper-mache core, or you apologising to me for the lack-of-flower-giving when you noticed a bouquet on a table near us, or you chasing me halfway up the stairs to send me to my doorstep. it doesnt have to be anything…  If I Feel So much of what we live goes on inside - The diaries of grief, the tongue-tied aches Of unacknowledged love are no less real For having passes unsaid. What we conceal Is always more than what we dare confide. Think of the letters that we write our de*d. - Dana Gioia Haven’t I been here before? The inadequacies, the comparisons, the green-eyed monster the heart stirs, the wondering, the uncertainties, the questions, the thoughts the mind churns out, the past I can never twist, the future I cannot know, the way reality works which I still do not know how to reconcile. Round and round and now I return to this familiar place. I am afraid, of what lies ahead due to the past, so tell me how do I — Fri, 04 Jul 2008 01:58:31 +0000 My first plug for a sweet friend!  Pretty babe, right? I feel so too. Sheylara is 1 of the 8 finalists in the Most Entertaining Blog category of the Omy Singapore Blog Awards! Congratulations [ok, a tad premature at the moment]! Qy’s writings have always been interesting and engaging [her blog’s on my daily reads list], how apt it is for her to be nominated for this category! Do help her win this award by doing the following:  1) Click here to vote [easy peasy] 2) Click on the “Vote Now” button [also easy peasy] 3) Enter your email and choose a password 4) Fill in the rest of your details such as your age vital stats marital status whether you brush your teeth every day and how many strands of hair you drop per month and click on her picture to vote This is her on the bottom right hand corner. Please vote for her [and don’t get distracted by the others], else The Goonfather will come after you with a parang. Do this once a day to help increase her votes! Accidentally Drugged There is a first time for everything. In all of 5 hours yesterday, I saw singledoubletriple during my meetings and kept wanting to tumble off wildly from my seat wanted to throw up every time I shakenodturn my head felt incredibly dizzygiddyweak blacked out for a bit and crashed to the ground [can’t really recall howwhatwhy, only remember colleague calling boss, boss!] criedtearedbrood because of above incident managed to stand up only to sway comically backforthbackforth, and then sit back down abruptly on wherever again had the worried boss drive me home muttered to boss I want to throw up and My head feels detached from my body about 632814 times on the way back stumbletripveered drunkenly into the house, into my room - world still spinning, lay in bed - world still spinning, close my eyes - world still spinning. Felt like I was driftingfloatingflying around amused Eliot by my opening greeting of Today the sunset is in shades of pink and peach to which he replied Are you high??! made Eliot laugh at me throughout our conversation, bugger it, where’s the sympathy?? irritated Eliot with my mumblings.. I think. :/ tried to sleep but it felt as though I was levitating myself off my bed and was afraid I’ll float out of the windows mistook my table for my closet [the said furniture are on opposite ends of my room] dreamt of monsters thought I saw monsters, hallucinations omg jackknifed up in fright and almost punched my mum [in reflex] when she tapped me really gently on my shoulder to wake me up was supported by mum’s armhandshoulder because she was afraid I’d faint while walking from room to kitchen Guess why? Because I took… *drum roll*… painkillers. Yes, anti-climatic, I know. The painkillers were prescribed by a doctor for a pain which has been recurring for the past month. 2 pills and 4 hours later, I felt like I was on drugs [not medicine-drug but like, cannabis-marijuana-drug (not that I’ve taken any before)], or reallyreallyreally high on alcohol. Of course, it didn’t occur to me to make that link [drugs and drinks] til Eliot pointed it out with You sound so stoned and I think you’re very high and then repeated them every few minutes to drive into my head that I was insane not of sound mind not behaving very normally. What kinda painkillers are these, d*mmit?! And the reason for this entry to be under ‘about funnies’ is because, thinking back, the 5 hours have really been quite comical [’cept for the blacking out part]. Or maybe my sense of humour is dark and morbid. Or maybe I’m still insane. *giggle giggle* Still feel like throwing up here hello. Mortini Night Recently a bunch of us met up for drinks tea hi-tea happy hour argh, how-should-it-be-called? at The Bar at Morton’s. (more…) A Series of Fortunate Events [II] [This is going to be a boring entry following A Series of Fortunate Events I]  And so I woke up all groggy and stumbly on my birthday itself to.. [guess what] run some errands. Caught a powernap some time in the afternoon before heading out for dinner with the family.   The original place was too crowded so we settled for this.   My sudden craving for vietnamese rice noodles. (more…) Bouts of Randomness Just realised my Japan [mis]adventures have been the only entries properly written the past couple of months; others were seemed very fragmented, bimbotic [well, this one is deliberate] and random. Well, more of my randomness for now. Beebs sent me this and I thought it was pretty cute! The many facets of work life:    Boss not around:  Boss calling:  In a meeting:  Training:  Tea break:  Before noon on a weekend:  Ready to get off work:  A holiday tomorrow:  Receiving today’s target from boss:  Tough target to meet:  Finding it impossible to meet boss’ requirements:  OT:  A whole night of OT:  Being notified to do OT during weekends:  Meeting with ‘Sorry-I-Don’t-Know’ clients:  Made mistakes at work:  Achieving little:  Frustrating things happening:  Finance people not giving the $$:  NO BONUS this year:     Busy working, pick.ing.up.the.pieces, accepting happiness, and having fun with friends to blog regularly. I believe that is called ‘having a life’. Not a zen and fuss-free one but still. [I’ll be back. Soon. Promise!] We All Were Children Once and how easily we forget. Oh boy, I wasn’t aware of the existence of the musical! Come to S’pore please! Even though I have not had my book with me for more than a year [Beebs!!], I can still remember chunks of it, word for word. Those who have read it should know which part this is. “Adieu,” dit le renard. “Voici mon secret. Il est tres simple: on ne voit bien qu’avec le coeur. L’es-sentiel est invisible pour les yeux.” “C’est le temps que tu as perdu pour ta rose qui fait ta rose si importance.” That Deja Vu Bit if.. I’m going to be in for that, do it fast. Deja Senti if.. I’m going to be in for that, do it fast. [Not My Best But] It Doesn’t Have to Be Anything it doesn’t have to be anything. it can be the sound of your laughter, thrown in the air; natural and unsuppressed, the way your eyes crinkle up with joy, how you place your head against your arm on the table, shoulders shaking uncontrollably with mirth when something tickles your funny bone. it doesn’t have to be anything. it can be the way you look from across the table, or when you busy yourself with your mobile; concentrating hard on the task at hand, it can be you reaching for my hand; fingers interlocking together, and i will sense a pinch of shyness, a drop of uncertainty, a dollop of confidence - these and more from a mere touch. it doesn’t have to be anything. it can be the quickness in which you play along and rebut my exaggerated sarcastic statements with yours, or how you attempt to speak in the language which you were not taught [not too badly, if i might say], the helpless S.O.S signals you sent me when Miss Host rattled on in the foreign language, oblivious to our.. deficiency in it. it can also be hearing your gentle calming voice over the mobile, and the smile that comes along with it. it doesn’t have to be anything. it can be how you let me meet the group[s] and are unafraid of showing affection; you do not hide and keep me in the shadows. it can be the way you hum and sing in my presence, and how your eyes pierce into mine when we dance. it can be you being serious and sharing when i really need you to; that calms my paper-mache core. it can be you apologising to me for the lack-of-flower-giving when you noticed a bouquet on a table near us, or chasing me halfway up the stairs to send me to my doorstep. it doesnt have to be anything… .. and i will smile. Protected: Deer Caught In Headlights This post is password protected. To view it please enter your password below: Password: Bouts of Randomness Just realised I’ve been very random the past couple of months. Well, more of it for now. Beebs sent me this and I thought it was pretty cute [and accurate!]. The many facets of work life:  Boss is not here?               Boss is calling?   In a meeting?           Training?      Tea break? Before noon on weekend?   Ready for getting off work?                Tomorrow is a holiday?? Got today‘s target from boss??   Tough target? Find impossible to meet boss‘s requirement? OT for 2hrs?         OT for a whole night? Being notified to OT on weekends? Meet with ‘Sorry-I-Don‘t-Know‘clients?         Made mistakes in work?   Little achievement?          Frustrating things happens?   Finance person doesn‘t give the money:     Being advised NO BONUS this year??                A Series of Fortunate Events [I] … and some unfortunate ones. What craaaazy busy 5 days it has been! I feel almost normal again [not normal being the past few months where I didn’t have a social life]! I was in a holiday mood even before my actual day itself, but had to suppress it because of the amount of work waiting for me to clear. :/ Twas a pity I didn’t have my camera with me the past couple of days. Wonderful moments should be captured and immortalised. Urm, I was too busy enjoying myself half the time to snap anything anyway. (more…) Ahem The 164th sign that even my boss is getting worried for me [though he really doesn’t have to be at this point in time]. Hi [insert my name here], Pl meet up with J [advertiser] to see what he got to offer. Thanks, S P.S. Maybe he is handsome, older, single and available! Thought of the Day Personally I don’t believe you can steal one human being from another. You can’t steal people, despite what Josh thinks. People are funny. They just slip away.  - One For My Baby Happy 21st To Me! It’s my birthday and I’ll cry [laugh, be angry, be naughty, be ‘attitude-y’, be sarcastic, be mischievous, be sad, laladida] if I want to!   Not one, but two cakes! From two really really sweet good friends. To be updated soon.  T Squared S Ok, now I’m really really confused. So confused I don’t know whether to =) or =( or =/. With Friends Like Them.. Remember this emo photo? It invited a sort-of discussion, starting with BFF. Bff: *sneaks up and push* hur hur hur Me: *drag bff along* hur hur hur BL: cool photo. it has character…a sense of mystery…but also a sense of yearning hmm. Me: yearning is right.. and quite a bit of pensiveness. JH: dot dot dot… character, mystery, sense of yearning and pensiveness? It’s obvious the only thing on display is ‘backside’ lor..alamak Me: why are you so mean? why are you so mean? why are you so mean??? *uppercut bish* must look beyond the obvious. duh… i was really pensive then. seriously.. DrS: actually, she was doing the Chinese thingy staring at the duck, and wondering where is the nearest restaurant to roast it JH: *ducks the uppercut* -smiles at his own pun- So how was the duck? Bet you were wishing it was goose instead huh? Goose foie gras more yummy lei? Me: you guys are ganging up against me [and my nicely taken photograph].. sulk. actually i was using my superpowers, attempting to change the statue into a real life person. don’t tell anyone i am one of them Heroes. shh. They massacred my nice emo photograph! *indignant*