Ting’s VLL #1 I think from today onwards, I can start dispensing valuable life lessons to those who bother to read. Before I go on with the tidbit of the day, can I just rant how freaking tired I am?! I was pretty much feeling the fatigue setting in after sneezing non-stop in the office today, with colleagues asking if I was sick. Sneezing only, don’t scared! Off to Comex I went, and it was so packed it wasn’t even funny. I was getting seriously crowd-sick. Then I was looking out for the booth in the directory before heading in to the exhibition hall (like directory, can go straight, don’t need waste time you see!). I saw the floor plan before and I knew which area it was, but somehow, I just couldn’t see it on the directory outside the hall at all! I stood there. And I stood there. I still stood there. Find, cannot find. Relook, cannot see. Wah, printing error is it? A couple joined behind me and studied the directory. Male: Oh, -insert company name- has a booth here as well! Female: Oh yah, they are there -pointed to the directory- I don’t have eyes at the back of my head, so I didn’t see where she pointed. So there wasn’t a printing error, so I continued to trace each inch of both the directories, STILL CANNOT FIND. Like, seriously?! Then very steam already right? I refused to give up, so I stood there again very long. I felt utterly defeated and just turned very quickly and stared at the couple behind me and they still hadn’t walked away. I flashed a sheepish smile, and asked pretty quickly, and may I add, shyly, “Where do you see -insert company name-??” They gave me the most taken aback look, probably wondering how blind I really am behind the thick glasses, and pointed to me AT THE EXACT AREA I WAS STARING AT, and my company name was like flashing at me mockingly. DUH. I scooted off into the direction and went straight to the booth, giggling and blushing. Then I got car-sick when caught in the jam to jaybeeeeee to fetch Minibean, since my overseas guests are here tomorrow, and it is their first trip to Singapore! I hope they don’t wipe Ion out clean! *** Okay. Valuable Life Lesson, numero uno. DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT, attempt to cut your own bangs at 1am in the morning, when you are absolutely to-the-bones exhausted and couldn’t even walk straight as you get home to your door. A shower is not good enough to sober you up when you are this tired, I can assure you. And it will be your biggest mistake when you do your courageous attempt when you decide to ignore your -650 degrees short-sightedness whilst doing so without your glasses. The result? One side of your bangs will rest above your brows, and the other side will rest above your lashes. But you wouldn’t even realise until you put on your glasses and then you could burst out laughing at yourself, with an uh-oh too loud for the night. Trust me, it is nowhere near starting any fashion trend. For the extra pound Just last month, I made a list of emergency food, catered for days when the hormones steer me out of control. You know how you have fussy taste buds when the evil hormones creep up on you? I know I have days like this when there are some food I MUST stuff into my mouth and feel the taste engulfing my tongue, giving me the much needed comfort. Thankfully, it was nothing like during my pregnancy, when I had craved for Jalan Kayu’s Maggie Goreng (and yes, must be THAT particular store) and “fucked-up” eggs (you know, when a egg is fried untidily, with its edges lacing up?) with soy sauce, and there were specifics to be fulfilled. At least the monthly cravings are generally easier to please, and could be any item out of the list I have compiled below. It just can’t go wrong. In the past month, due to work and entertainment and all things in between and beyond, I have stuffed myself silly in the hope of gaining some mass after getting tired of hearing how I am anorexic (no, I love my carbs, and I love my cheesy pastas and all things fried and oily) since the array of good food I was given the chance to get better acquainted with shouldn’t go to waste. There are just some standard stuff that I will occasionally think of having… and good enough to bring comfort. 1. Picotin’s Foie Gras - I know how cruel it is and all, but I just can’t resist a good piece of skilly-cooked liver that could bring me to the edge of batteries-free orgasm. I literally moaned in delight when I get to eat really, really good foie gras, though a mediocre standard one is enough to stub the cravings out. Good alternative is the one at Bukit Timah, the restaurant round the corner from Alameen. Last Sunday, when I was out having dinner with the-one-who-blamed-me-for-her-Chanel-bag (cos she said I triggered the bag hormones in her. I was willing to bear the responsibilities of taking care of her bag for her), we made our way to Picotin where the starters were really awesome, especially the foie gras I ordered. 2. Baked cheese escargot/bacon osyters - Picotin also serves delicious escargot, though sometimes I can get my fix at Hoo Ha’s. Breeze at Scarlet Hotel and Hoo Ha both have great baked oysters too. Hoo Ha’s oysters win with freshness, though Scarlet Hotel’s wins with.. bacons. 3. Bak Gwa - I love those with blackened trims, and the bacon barbecued pork are just worth piling the pounds for lah. 4. Cafe Cartel - Baked pasta/Spageddies - Baked penne. My love for baked penne and pasta stemmed from the years in London and this is the closest to what I used to have back then. Best part is it isn’t too pricey, though a pity that yesterday’s trip to Paragon’s Spageddies made me realise that I have to look elsewhere next time. Cafe Cartel’s pasta is a lil creamy and not too dry, and I often can polish every, single bit of the cream sauce off the plate. 5. Carbonara - I had wanted to nominate Angel’s share (at Dempsey) carbonara, but unfortunately the chef had left when I went recently, thus they no longer serve carbonara there. I am still trying to look for a place with decent carbonara, except the one I made, of course. Laughs. 6. Beef pepper lunch - Love it when I douse lotsa soy sauce and garlic sauce onto it and make it really tasty. Don’t ever takeaway though, it sucks. 7. Thai Express beef basil rice - The spiciness and all, with chewy bits of beef, love it man! 8. Aston’s steak - Simply cos it is economical and of sweet standard! Medium rare, please! And yes, I love steak.. especially thick, and utterly, decadently juicy. Hoo Ha has really juicy steak, and the usual haunt in the past is Hoggies which you could seldom go wrong. But Aston was surprisingly good, and shall try their Wagyu some day. 9. Thin-crust pepperoni pizza - I blame Rome for this obsession. Though now, I think Valentino and Picotin both have the most drool-worthy pizzas in Singapore. 10. Bakerzin Aglio Olio with bacon - It is spicy, oily and not bland. And with the bacon, it is purrrrfect. Why ah? The last time they forgot to add in the bacon, and still charged $3 for it! Grr…. 11. Mee siam - This is a funny one. I don’t eat mee siam on non-hormonal days. It is not one of my favourite food, but something about the soupy, spicy, skinny mee siam appeals to me. 12. Chicken marcaroni - I don’t like soupy stuff, but I love this with red chilli and soy sauce, and I can polish an entire bowl off. 13. Carr’s with cheese and salami - Great snack to make at home. And works terribly well as comfort food to make me less grumpy and sulkish. 14. Old Chang Kee - I don’t usually stop by Old Chang Kee, but when hormones set in, you will see me tapping on the glass panel like playing photosearch like that. Yam cake. Original curry puff. Crab claws. Soft squids. Spring roll. Dumplings. And lots and lots of sambal chilli to go with them. 15. Chocolate - when I was younger, this was like THE essential. Maybe it is with age, that the craving subsided, but sometimes I know I need to stuff something chocolatey into my mouth. I like when it is between dark and milk chocolate, not too sweet, a lil bitter, yet not too so. Like Royce, which melts in my mouth, Godiva, or even the usual Kitkat and Rocher…. a big tub of nutella with a nice, big spoon work wonders too! Was having dinner at Canele last night, and they have absolutely sinful chocolate cake - Caribe. 16. Black pepper crab - The one at Upper Thomson, still holds fond memories. BBQ butter crab - Only found it at Newton… anywhere else, anyone? 17. Butter/Oatmeal crayfish - Nothing beats the one in JB. 18. Beef burger - Breko’s steak sandwich, or the one at Relish, or the one at Grand Park Hotel… and I love those with cheese, eggs, and crispy bacon. 19. Sambal stingray - Probably the only fish I really eat. I remember old Taman Jurong hawker used to have this stall that is really kick-ass but I have no idea where to find it anymore. 20. Sambal Kangkong - can eat like eating noodles like that. Something about the saltiness, the spiciness, the shrimps. You wanna try the one I cook (which I really think is yummy, haha), you better have a strong stomach to take the spice… and be warned of the stingy rims days after… 21. Mummy’s homecooked dark soy-sauce pork - Something about this I love. I can eat more than 2 bowls of rice whenever she cooks this dish. 22.  Scones - I love big, starchy, buttery scones. AMPLE LOVE! Fosters, Royal Copenhagen, or even the ones at Olio. I simply love pastries! Companied by a hot, comforting pot of Earl Grey and Camomile, snuggle up in bed with a novel on a rainy day… what else can one ask for? 23. Chips - I love potato chips. Someone left a pack on my table today and I didn’t even ask if someone had placed it there by mistake or not, and I finished it. 24. Peanut tangyuan for desserts! 25. Dim Sum! Especially those fried ones, with yam! 26. Delifrance - Mushroom, ham and cheese croissant, but nowadays seldom see it around. The standard used to be way better, say, 8 years ago. 27. Buah Keluak - I LOVEEEEEE THIS, SO DOES MINIBEAN! I remember first having it on 31st December 2007, at the restaurant at Novena, with Uncle Keith. Everytime I see this dish at family settings these days, I still remember the person who first introduced it to me. Despite it being slightly spicy, Minibean loves it. She is a courageous young lady. 28. Yoshinoya beef bowl with teriyaki chicken - I know it is not quality Japanese food, but there is just something about it that makes me crave it bad! 29. Sushi - despite not a big Japanese food fan, I love seaweed, rice roll, and dipping them into nasal-clearing wasabi mixed with soy sauce. Yum! Had california roll again at Standing Sushi Bar today so I can do that! 30. Mee sua with lean pork + sesame oil + a dash of rice wine - Had this during confinement and have been looking for a stall which sells kick ass one after the previous stall near my place moved. 31. Char Kuey Tiao… tell me, how to resist? 32. This is strange, at this moment, I just want bittergourd cooked in black-bean sauce. 33. Popeye’s biscuits! I can eat many many many at one go. 34. Indian curry. Crispy prata. The lil shop in Croydon still charms me. 35. Maggie Goreng, Pedas - If I had craved it badly during pregnancy, of course the hormones demand for it once in a while. 36. Asparagus with bacon - The tori-Q way is good enough! 37. Century egg porridge - Just for the century egg! 38. Jaffa cakes - Upon arrival in UK, my first purchase was to go into the grocery shop and grabbed a pack of McVities Jaffa cakes off the shelves. How I miss it! 39. Fried Tofu and claypot eggplant at Crystal Jade. 40. Takoyaki - those flour balls with ham and cheese in it, add some mayonnaise and onion skin, heavenly! 41. A good, thick, juicy sausage, big enough to fill the entire mouth as you sink your teeth into it. And I really do mean, sausage. I am sure there are more, but off the top of my mind are the above… Will add more to the list when I can recall. And I am hungry just thinking through each and every item mentioned. So, what do you crave? Edited: How could I forget Kenny Rogers?! The cheesy pasta, the garden pasta salad, and corn muffin! Two more hours I am not feeling positive about this, but what the heck. At least I finished more than 1/2 of what I was supposed to. My mind is clouded today and my vision is blurry. Had lunch with 2 awesome chicks this afternoon, and since then, it got a lil dreary. Then, there was this casual daydream session, which I joked will end up in the below scenario: Scarlett Ting says: can u imagineeeee we wear big shades.. with chanel tweed jacket…on killer heels (christian louboutin, i might add) and sit front row, then take off sunglasses WU SEHLY then realise is prada runway show. But it is like, such things very possible will happen to me one right? Anyway. Did I say my mind is very clouded today? What a wrong day to do so. Bleah. Will write more tonight (like finally!). I have a plan If I can find a bit of spare time peeling myself away from constant fingering…… on the mouse, or finish the 600 questions I was tasked to do so by tomorrow, I will… perhaps need to give the furry armpit a bit of attention before I could finally blog something decent. Oh. And the daily exercises. I haven’t even dried my hair since showering just now! I am just glad to meet someone who shares the same love for Horatio Caine and thinks that he is so sexxxxxaaaay! Love at FIRST sight After my endless lust for all things pretty, I seldom put words into action. As far as my spontaneity brings me, my impulsiveness seldom brings me this far. And after days and days and days of deliberation and all…. I’ve finally got a winner! I am sorry that I faltered, and sinned. BUT! I was egged on by an overseas sponsor and with constant tickling to my desires, I finally caved. The purchase was made in mid-August, though it didn’t reach me till, say, a week ago until I collected it from Uncle Mark, and though I was initially hesitant about it since I didn’t know what to expect as I wasn’t the one scouting it, touching it, I certainly was convinced once I set my eyes, and touch on it for the very first time. And here…. *drums roll*, the first encounter… My first Bbag! Stripping it for the first time… Taking the first peek. The moment I first set eyes on it. With it sitting on my bed, teasing me. Balenciaga First, in Pourpre. A First for my first Bbag! How apt Captured in dimmed lights. Pourpre is a shade of dark red, a twist to the bright red I had looked for. But I was told this colour was pretty special, and shows ample personality and depth in different setting. It wasn’t as eye-catching when I saw it, as it was a low-profile kinda dark, but that’s what made it pretty mysterious. Despite being told what it was like, I still could not really envision a real representation of its colour.. cos there just isn’t quite any pictures to capture the real colour. It has a blue hue to it, a bit of purple, a lil tan as well. But that’s why in different settings, it is such a charmer, like there is always something new, something more to this colour than it seems. I like it most in daylight setting, and see how the well-worn leather crawls on the bag, it is so soft and smells heavenly of leather. Very nice to hug! With some lights filtering in, as it sat on my lap, it looks like tan shade of brown. And how it looks like lit by street lights filtering in onto it in the night. I got a hairy belly, giggles. And here, first day out in the sun as I headed out for lunch on a Sunday: A luscious burst of colour in daylight. And then some orangey hue in a banquet setting: First rainy day, with drizzle in the background: And a first peek inside, as it was the only picture that I think manage to capture a bit of the blue hue I was talking about. And a close up before we go on for more shameless cam-whoring pictures: And the first pictures we shared, and this is the one that shows the closest how the colour really looks like: Me looking damn miserable cos was cold sweating from the pain. Okay, I can’t possibly think of captions for every picture right? Byebye arms alert. And how the First looks with casual (wanted to upload the one with face but then my camera isn’t hooking up to my desktop, and will just use the one I used for posting elsewhere): This picture was not deliberately taken this way, but it just turned out like this, sompah!: It is supposed to be a black and white, colour accented picture that should only show red hues, but failed terribly as my skin and the car behind also got red hues: Such a colour of depth, and so much of an enigma, I was told that the colour is very uh, me, so that’s why it was highly recommended to me, instead of a bright, vivacious red, or a white giant city with gold hardware. Which is also indirectly saying that such a klutz like me shouldn’t ruin a good, pretty piece of white leather. And despite the guilt from the impulse spending, I am definitely gonna be kept slim since I will be eating grass happy for a while. -Beams- Keeping fingers crossed I shan’t succumb to such irrationality again soon. Someone said if I can keep my impulsiveness in check, he would buy me another Bbag in 3 years’ time, hor, Mr Leong? Standing Sushi Finally, some unadulterated rest for the weekend! Despite being absolutely maxed out, I managed to keep myself awake till 4ish last night, listening to the rain out there, and just slowing my pace to a low as I busied with…. nothing that really matters! And the prize for that is to wake up when it was almost evening at 5pm today. Yipppppppeeeeeeee! *** It seems there are countless things to catch up with this weekend, but I am just glad to have some me-time to finish some of them. I need to find some time to touch the account I set up but then I guess some of the other more mindless things are taking priority (like, say, Bejeweled, cos I just managed to figure out what it really is), catching up on videos, and the reading I have put off. Sheesh, I haven’t gotten the book I need to study, but I doubt I will get down to doing that since I am just too comfortable with this pace to disrupt it. I am feeling an urge to go in search of another undiscovered haven later tonight, but the night is still young, so blogging shall prevail! *** It was food galore all week long, and after the hives-induced session on late Thursday night for a birthday celebration, I was fearlessly taking on all sorts of seafood on Friday, not caring a hoot for the potential disfigurement. I was craving for a break and the taste of wasabi, and decided to drag my ass out of office for lunch since it was the conclusion to a work week. So off I went to… Standing Sushi Bar! Standing Sushi Bar is the baby of Howard, officially opened just a couple of weeks back. Been wanting to head down to check the place out but just didn’t have the time to, and on this brilliant Friday, I decided to head out for some sushi! I was trying to figure out why is there a basket of eggs… and then I realised those weren’t chicken eggs(I wasn’t technically wrong, actually). I was hoping to avoid the peak hour lunch crowd, though I was certainly a little shy to be the only one around at that time, eating sushi alone (hey, what’s the matter? I do that all the time, just not.. uhm, standing!). The boss was around, and after standing around to chat for a while, I realised I didn’t make any order! Woops. Just like the day before I told the cab driver the wrong place to go! I must be service-industry’s worst nightmare for a different reason, laughs. The clean-cut feel to the eatery was absolutely pleasant. Though I was having strong cravings, I was cautious since my episode of hives happened just 12 hours before. Perhaps I didn’t mention that I had some tummy upset that very morning too. Still, I guess in my world, craving is king, and I caved. I bravely took on California roll (with crabsticks), Scallop roll, and most importantly, I overcame my fear for fish with a Unagi sushi (I think I am progressing well with my recent episodes with fishes), topping the meal off with egg sushi. This was how my fabulous lunch look like. I particularly love the california rolls (look at the pretty pieces of avocado in them!), and the scallop rolls (generous slices of fresh, chewy scallops, which honestly, was impressive! Heavenly). As I took on the Unagi, it was definitely fresh (or else I wouldn’t finish the entire piece of sushi) and of decent standard for a fish-o-phobic to down it. Though I would say, my first encounter with the Unagi is still very hindered by my fish-o-phobia, and it was more psychological than anything for me to hesitate to enjoy my Unagi sushi. Unfortunately I missed out on the Teriyaki Chicken Don cos lunch business was so good that it was sold out by the time I was there. Another plus point to the joint? Not only is it own by such a cutie (so cutee.. giggles. Me sooo shy!), the staffing was great. The ladies just have a knack for cheering up your day with their bubbly personalities and they are definitely eye-candies as well. As I was having my lunch, I was twitting with @missyflorence and @winnilicious, and we ended up arranging for a lunch meeting at @standingsushi next Wednesday since we were all around the same area, and they would want to check out the place as well. Yay! Sushi (and eye candy) next week! Nope, it wasn’t my intention to capture Howard’s ass. Honest! Standing Sushi Bar is located on the basement level of OUB Centre, at Raffles Place MRT, #B1-02B. Yes, you do have to stand if you are having lunch, but you can make seating reservations for dinner, where there will be other dishes available on the menu. I shall have my dinner there one of these days after work *** Saw right outside OUB centre right after lunch: Who is? Really? But I really like how they rouse the curiosity…. *** It was in the evening when I rushed off from work to change, dress up and the works for a black-tie event in the evening. I was hesitating if I should go, until I was told how it will be a great networking session (telling me this was more of deterring me from going than helping, seriously) and yadda yadda yadda. So finally arrived early at Meritius Mandarin for some serial introduction sessions, and trying not to trip over the train of my gown. Ended up at the observation lounge with a great view of the city before the darkness snuck in. The pot of tea was accompanied by wasabi chips! Must be a good day since I was craving for wasabi and I had my wishes fulfilled! It was just great to sit there and chill to rest the feet and hide away from all the small talks (I ain’t too good with that, seriously). It was getting dark and it was time to enter the ballroom for the event to start, and thus, I had to say goodbye to the nightview. And it was pretty interesting as it was a formal event with a twist. It was a western banquet with very much a fusion theme. The starter with duck, lobster and salmon, and I courageously ignore the allergy and prayed I ain’t allergic to lobster. Thank God, I wasn’t! Heh heh. They served man tou next, with char siew bun (chicken char siew, that is). So cute! And the gift pack on the table was one of so much creativity! The giant cake for the 40 years-old. The highlight of the evening was meeting a bunch of smart, strong and passionate women who are out there for a good cause. Main course was then served! Hainanese chicken rice from chatterbox! I already said it was different isn’t it? I joked this is the seventh month getai, the ang moh style, singing worship songs with a band, in a hotel, instead of hokkien songs in HDB heartland. Instead of sitting at the carpark with fans, it is inside a ballroom with air-con. And long speeches replaced the raunchy dance acts and auctions. Mango Pudding as desserts, which didn’t appeal to me since I ain’t that much of a pudding person. Give me rich cakes anytime! And the really cute plate of goodies to go with the cup of tea to conclude the night! How pretty! *** I got such a sweet message to tell me to look out for the moon cos it was incredibly awesome last night, but it ended so late that the skies were so clouded that the moon hid from me.  *** The world is so small. I bumped into Uncle Keith’s cousin at the event. Sigh. *** My reverse parking needs more practise before I hit a car some day. Heels and driving can’t go together as long as I can’t feel my toes in those CFM shoes. *** At the dinner, we were sitting at the same table as some important person’s cousin. So of course, we spoke of subjects I probably can’t discuss here. Apparently, it was announced once, by a very important person in a family setting, that “I want to build a robotic society.” And though it wasn’t put down in the pledge, I am sure we are pretty much there, or heading there already. I never say who hor. Don’t quote me. *** How did I end up still at the monitor since I woke up at 5pm, only breaking for an Aston’s beef burger for dinner? Minibean is back in JB already, and I wish I had more time for her this week. Night is still young. What else to utilize a long night like this? Supersonic Actually I just wanted to write something, and yet totally clueless of what to write. I am tired after reaching home only at 2am, and the more amazing fact is that my spawn, the famed Minibean, has just reached home at 3.10am. She has more of a social life than me. If today is Wednesday, I would have thought she had made a trip to Mambo or something. *** A lone figure sat on the concrete floor where I used to hide when I needed some quiet time. I had wanted to go to the little hideout for some fresh air when I saw the familiar face sitting there. I don’t know who she is. I only know her by face as she has distinctive features, hair colour, and perhaps the only person around who made me feel well-fitted in whenever I wore one of them miniskirts to work. Her looks portray ample strength, one of which that is remote,  distant, and plenty of attitude. Today, I saw her sitting there on the floor behind the pillar, with her legs crossed over her 4-inches black heels, clad in jeans. The dressing on her nose was hard to miss. After she finished her cigarette, held with plenty of character in her straightened fingers, she fumbled for her pouch and dug out the pack again, and lit one up almost immediately. She took a glance at her phone, before her privacy was further intruded by the 2 security guards having a break. During the time I observed her, I felt a great urge to go up to her and ask if she was alright. I didn’t. And I wish I did. Whoever you are, I wish you well. *** Headed for a meeting at Ubi today with my colleague, and we headed back to town by cab, looking for somewhere to sit down to check mails and all. As the cab was cruising along, she first raised the alarm by saying that the cab shouldn’t be passing by Lornie. I thought the driver was going another way, and continued the journey. And then, something didn’t seem right. We passed Eng Neo, and then I asked the uncle which way was he taking to head back to town. “PIE, Miss, you going Jurong right?” I was immediately red-faced and WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPS damn loudly with my palm cupping my mouth. I sheepishly apologised to my colleague and blamed it on the usual habit. I just giggled and my colleague could only laugh in amusement. We were at Clementi when we made an U-turn back to town and settled for Suntec City Coffee Bean. *** The strangest thing happened today. We were sitting at Coffee Bean when my phone suddenly died and reset itself. I tried to reset it, fearing that it would be returning to factory settings like the way it did for 4 times in the past year. It started up, and then the moment it reached the homescreen, it auto-shut itself. I tried setting up again, it died again. To the point that I switched it on, it automatically shut down, and then reset itself, and rebooted by itself. I cursed to my colleague, saying my phone is so incredibly cranky that I fear I might have to get it repaired. I showed her the “phenomenon” of my phone, and was slightly worried how it would be some motherboard problem and I have to send it in for servicing. Just as I was complaining and gave up trying, her phone suddenly shut down by itself, and rebooted itself. It hung the same way, before resetting itself again. We have the same model of phone, and was under the same telco. I started saying, “I don’t mean to gloat, but I think the problem is not with my phone, and I am somewhat relieved.” But we couldn’t figure out what could be the potential problem that was making that error. Can’t be Nokia’s fault right? I mean, unless they programmed the phone to go crazy at the same time, but unlikely. We were wondering if our telco provider had their network hacked. Alien invasion? Crippling the nation by messing the network? The signals to our phones were mixed up? But whatever it was, why did it interfere with our phone settings and made it keep shutting down and rebooting by itself? I joked maybe if we walked further away from each other, it might work. The moment we stood up and headed upstairs, our phones recovered at the same time. Now I was wondering if we were near some sort of secret services offices, and our phone signals had ventured into the unknown, forbidden zones. But that was really, really strange. And we couldn’t find any logical reasons behind it. *** Sat around with YF in the evening, and though I have so many friends in the financial industry, it is hard to find someone with as much integrity and passion like him. Coupled with his determination and perseverence, I believe his day will come. *** I think I am overly-emo today when I get teary-eyed when I read on the news how a newborn was abandoned. Then I saw her picture in the chinese tabloids and she looks so, so, so precious. How can…..? *** Supper was at Newton Circus and it was plenty of laughter and animated talks over seafood. It is funny how the toughest situations could be used as laughing fodders over food, as if how they don’t really matter. A drunk man was singing “I believe I can fly…” And I candidly chirped in “I believe I can touch the sky“… though I think they were afraid I might end up in trouble agitating the drunkard, who proudly declared that he is an “angel”, which prompted me to ask “Where are his wings ah?” with widen-eyes. And then, I am announcing this with a heavy heart that, not only am I allergic to alcohol, apparently seafood has fallen into the list of forbidden food. WOE IS MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! I broke into hives though I have to say that I went easy on the seafood this time round, compared to my recent crab-eating spree. Then the shallow breathing kicked in and my heart rate raced.. and then the itch. HOW CAN LIKE THAT?! Luckily, a sweet babe was around and she went back home to take her stash of antihistamine to help me tide the night over. Really lah, sometimes small gestures like this, are all it takes to make me smile. *** I inched home today and it was straight. Giggles. *** The evil people on my facebook had pipped my curiosity, after their statuses had constantly nagged or displayed about this facebook game. I then logged in to try my hands at Bejeweled Blitz. Nahbeh. Why no one warned me one? I am trying to finish this post so I can go start on it. *** I almost forgot about the dinner tomorrow. I am lazy to dress up Imagination Another bout of flu looming. This table-tennis effect is so, not, nice. Somehow, feeling utterly oppressed today, I decided to find a nice, quiet corner to do up my stuff, and let my thoughts flow. Hide, hide, hide, and it was productive! Few things got sorted over meetings today, and endless possibilities are ahead, just waiting to be green-lighted, and to be realized. Keeping fingers crossed. By the time I got back to office, it was almost 7pm. Squeezed in a quick dinner with YF, before making my way to my quiet corner, with nice evening breeze for somemore planning. And you know how the tiniest, sweet gesture from random stranger can just brighten your day just like this? I asked for a table where I could use the power point socket, and the waiter led me to a nice, breezy corner with a table for 6, where an empty socket was nearby. Lotsa place for me to strewn my notes around, nice. After he laid down the menu, I gave a quick order of iced tea, realised it wasn’t in the menu, thus changed it to Earl Grey. He then asked for my membership card. I didn’t realise I need to be a member before I could place an order. I regretful told him I ain’t a member, and was ready to pack my stuff, before he smiled and told me I could still use the table if I want to, and he asked if he could bring me a glass of iced water. I grinned brightly, thanked him profusely at the sweet offer, and proceeded on to set up my notebook. It wasn’t long before he was back with a sweaty glass of iced water, and then he placed another coaster down, and set a tall glass of iced tea (what I had wanted to order originally! I was already pleasantly surprised and happily thankful that he made an exception for me to place an order without membership!) with a bowl of tidbits beside it. What could get better than this? “Don’t worry, on the house,” he said. BEST. SERVICE. EVER! *** A quote that struck me today. “Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited to all we now know and understand, while imagination embraces the entire world, and all there ever will be to know and understand.” ~ Albert Einstein Long and winding road The heavy storm ceased towards late afternoon, and what was left of it, moulded the evening to be an almost perfect one. It was still drizzling by the time we set off, with the cool air as a cosy treat from the fuss earlier without the need for air-conditioned. We were greeted by a refreshed scent in the air, one that was moist and tickled deep into the senses. Long, winding, peaceful, quiet roads, he pointed out to me the lake in the distant that I almost missed. We cruised around, and the sun was warm, yet mellowed, the breeze teasing my hair, like a perfect weather for a jog, or a picnic. There were hidden treasures in here, I thought, and I relaxed. It was nice, very nice. The trees didn’t seem like the regular ones along the roads. I saw the hubs from a distant, as if the reality is far away, detached, yet I looked on, unscathed, hidden from the urbanization and all that jazz. And the familiarity grabbed me, like the one time long, long time ago, more than a decade so, down the long and winding road with overgrown shrubs flanking me in some secluded country roads in the suburbs of London. It was just, liberating. As if I could take flight. The serenity of it all. It is good to be back in control. (eh, another premature ejaculated post before I finished it. Just came back searching for the place I was brought to this noon, and I couldn’t find the lil “playground” I had found. What great weather it is, today) 0 hotstuff like this post. Like  2 wrongs Last week, I called to book an appointment this week. Right after I hung up upon confirmation, I excitedly (and may  note, immediately)  noted down the date on my calendar, 2nd September, Wednesday, it says. The scatterbrain in me pretty much geared myself up for this week, and then somewhere along the line, I had assumed it to be today, later in the evening. So I got myself dressed comfortably today, and cursed the weather silently when the storm caught me unaware until I lifted my head and saw the window panel right before me was mosaiced by the rain drops trailing down as they were halted by the glass. Quite pretty, actually. But! Hey, what about my appointment? I scrolled my phone and saw the calendar date marked for tomorrow. HAR? But then. Phew, since weather is less than forgiving. But. Fuck! Tomorrow I got a late meeting which might potentially drag on till 7pm. So I messaged to confirm my appointment time and to ask to postpone it cos I have a meeting tomorrow. “It is today.” Wooooooooooops! So I was subconsciously right all along! 2 wrongs had made it right afterall. Heh. *** I find the exercises and the physiotherapy sessions are doing much more for me than the chiropractor visits earlier on. And the dedicated attention, with specific areas assessment and all are working pretty well for me. Getting naked and having a body pressing against mine was perhaps the only thing I wish I am doing at the chiropractor’s (hahahaha!) since my physiotherapist is a female, and I had to suck in my tummy as she told me how my pelvis bones are imbalance. I shall wear a sports bra next time. But my physiotherapist really does have a magical touch, and a fusion of different techniques actually help to target my problematic areas much more effective. Nowadays I actually look forward to my weekly sessions for either some ultrasound relief, a good rub (ahem, I desperately needed that), and to correct some of the major spinal problems. Did I mention she is one of the loveliest persons you would meet? Though she would have me looking back at her dishevelled, heaving and panting when she made me do one of them exercises. She had said, “Oh dear, you are making this sound like porn.” HUH?! Haven’t I heard that somewhere before? Oh yes. Labour ward. No wonder people can seldom differentiate the misery from my pleasure. *** I like days when I am trapped in office like that, and couldn’t see beyond the buildings ahead. *** I joked with the guy sitting beside me that he might have seen the deep, dark side of my you-know-where. Well, he is a pathologist from the hospital where I did my biopsy, so that explains. It was pretty interesting when he saw my raise brows when he introduced himself and told me his profession. He thought I didn’t understand him, so he pulled the retractable tag and tried to clear my confusion. I gave a laugh, more so because I guess he would be thinking what a bimbo I am, though it probably wasn’t a look of confusion as he had misunderstood it to be. 0 hotstuff like this post. Like  ZzzzZzzz Exhausted. Awesome physiotherapy session today. Weather is freaking warm. Some reading squeezed in. Wanted to blog but didn’t do so. Awfully hungry at this moment. Didn’t get to see the lil one today. Tomorrow is another long day. I am feeling darn jittery. Things are looking upperty up a lil. My Like button is still having an erectile dysfunction. Time to sleep. 0 hotstuff like this post. Like  Seen and heard Over the weekend, much running around was done with some crisis management in hands, and getting endlessly worried, though at the same time, trying to make others less worried. It must have been a not-so-good year with many things happening to friends around me, and there was this recent day, not so long ago, that at the SAME TIME, SAME NIGHT, SAME THING, happened to 4 individuals at the same time, when they are not related or whatsoever. How creepy is that? It is going to be challenging for many people for the days ahead, but I guess it is just a natural process of how we handle with whatever cards life dealt with us. Sometimes do you realise we find it easier to go out of comfort zone of speaking to people, seeking for help, believing in what we do so, having a passion for what we speak when we are doing it for others, and it gets harder when it is actually for ourselves? *** Some pictures which I had been too lazy to share. A tiny piece of peace I found at some secluded area, distracting the cluttered mind from worries, plans, steps and circles of thoughts. Of course, the only picture of the Fishery Market, since I was too chicken to even stare at the other dead fishes, much less to take pictures of them. Was supposed to return on Saturday night with other friends, but the plan didn’t realise after a drive-around Singapore proved to be too tiring for one of them, understandably so. *** So I didn’t really set out what I set out to do over this weekend, though I had procrastinated it for a long time. I can only try again to keep our BIG (but unrealistic dreams) alive, hahaha. Had a nice dinner at Hoo Ha Cafe again, before heading to the East to get my pampering treat for myself, and along the way the plan to head to Jurong Fishery was dropped, so we ended the evening somewhere in the middle of the island. It was perhaps near midnight when I finally got back, and despite the fatigue, the little one was less than forgiving with her quest for attention. Though there was this part she managed to subdue herself a little, and had her head on my laps as she sang twinkle twinkle little star to me, and I joined in in chorus, patting her head, and she turned up and stared at me in the eyes. I tried to pluck my armpit hair, but it proves to be a big NONO because she ended up saying, “Mummy I help you!“  and pinched my armpit, real hard. Ouchie. NOTE TO SELF: Never pluck any other hair in front of her again! I was a little impatient and went on a sulking quiet protest, and she did her usual pounce-on-Mummy-to-tell-her-I-love-her-and-throw-in-a-big-wet-kiss. I didn’t bulge, and I did my physio exercises, before lying down and sleep, while softly babyvoicing (oh dear, I still have IT) her that I was very tired and I am so sad she is not listening to me. I wonder who is the baby now. She actually lie down quietly and then spoke in a soft babyvoice that she loves me, and I sayang-ed her face, hugged her, and we said a night prayer together before we went to sleep. I was knocked out in record timing. 2 weeks and still no solid rest. I. AM. ALMOST. DYING. I was woken a few times with her legs in my face, and her hand clawing my chest. There was this part she was crying in her sleep and I hushed her with And a few times I caught myself waking up in fear when I had treated her like my chowchow. But she is tough girl. *** Left her in bed before leaving the house this morning in the rain. What a nice weather to be sleeping in, and wasted to be out. However, halfway through, was feeling too unwell and had to leave early just so I could get home and get medicated. After I finally got to pluck my armpit hair, I actually fell asleep and found the weekend over before I actually found it beginning. I take pride in the tiny things. Like how I was able to do a bit of reading by a small pond which was teased by the drizzle (though the pain was too much to bear that I couldn’t even absorb much). I finally got the time to read a little, chill a little, breathe a little, blog a little. I collected my purchase (so many many many many awesomeness!). Got a deal in the bag just as week ended. And despite all the fatigue, Minibean fits into the schedule too. Only thing? My Like button is still sucky! Hmphf. *** Oh. This is a note I saw on a P-plated car on my neighbour’s windshield. Poor chap, meet such a rudie, though his parking was really quite bad, but that’s why his P-plate is there I think. Reminds me of the rudie that left me THAT ridiculous note, that made me don’t know to laugh or fume. I need nicer neighbours, I think. 0 hotstuff like this post. Like  Hidden gems What meant to be a longer day turned out to be much longer than it had planned to be. Meeting was shorter than the 2 days before, which perhaps spare the bad back a lil. I ended up didn’t go gallop, galloping at the Turf Club, but since I had a prior pleasant experience in the box lounge, I guess forsaken this time for a greater good was more appropriate in this case. A tiny piece of incident when I was almost “giaping” my legs with urgency when I needed the loo badly. I ran into the ladies, looking for relief, only to realise that 2 men were looking at me all flustered. Knowing how I have ALWAYS made an embarrassing mistake like this, I cupped mouth and squealed before running out apologising. In response, the guys squealed back in mocked horror. Trust me, the running was cos I needed the toilet badly. I ran out, turned around and saw it was LADIES sign what! I ran back in, the 2 guys laughing at how flustered I was. Plumbers. Bah! I didn’t care and went into the loo with all the embarrassing sounds to be heard. Just as the day seemed too grim, my co-worker messaged to relay the exceptionally good news to me that I was only too eager to share with my boss with one too many “yay”s and giggles. I should be glad I didn’t use any “BOOMSSZZ“. Sat around at Toa Payoh hub for a while, before going for dinner of Bak Kut Teh in between phone calls. It should be a quick conclusion to the day though a reluctance of ending the day and the stress laden prompted an aimless, yet fruitful drive around places seldom ventured with me leading the way by not knowing the way. The west can be a very mesmerising place. Went into Jurong Island (haha!), okay fine, we went past the gantry and made an U-turn. From the massive plants standing stoic in the orange lights, spitting out clouds of pollutants to the sky, to the small hills of biofuel still worked on by the digger at this time of the night, workers cycling after a long day of shift work, a shipyard so well-hidden that you could only barely see the helm of a very massive fleet, and sights that were never seen nor heard flanking the peaceful, rural roads. I almost didn’t think there are still non airconditioned buses around. Or maybe they are all left to beautify places like Orchard and all. I survived well without triggering the gurkhas’ suspicion cos being shot was not really the way the curious cat want to go. And then, I thought of the camera I had underutilize, which would be of great use in such an occasion. Someday. I shall be back. An early night of rest (which I had aimed to sleep at 11pm) was no longer of importance with this recharged feeling, and then it became a quest to look for other hidden gems I was determined to find. A drive to Jurong Hill, to the place my dad used to bring me for Japanese dinner, as I recounted stories of my very first Japanese meal I could recall. I must have been 4 or 5 back then. I remember my first attempt at cold noodles, and what an exclusive event that was. The entire Jurong was not what I thought it to be. And the main adventure of the night, was…. FEAR FACTOR! Well, at least for me. Friends know how much I am fearful of… DEAD FISHES, and how I get nauseous seeing them, and my palms get all sweaty and such. Somehow witnessing a pet ariwona died when I was a young girl proved to be traumatic. So after going through all the checks and all, which prompted the guard to say, “First time here huh?” to my enthusiasm. I chirped a saccharine “Yup!” before skipping to the entrance. Jurong Fishery, here I am. The smell hit me first and I started breathing through my mouth, somehow, it is not unlike how people head to cemetery for the thrill, some kind of morbid curiousity. I walked to the dock, and saw the many fishing boats, some really state-of-the-art, some just… classically worn. Many men were sleeping around on the floor, or any where they can find, whilst many others were already preparing for business to be started at 2am. Nearby, there was a tentage of getai for the occupants of the building. It was a world of its own. I just walked around on the breadth of it, not wanting to venture in on the “walk of faith”. I browsed prawns and crayfish, totally intrigued by the business here, and of course looking totally out of place in a halter and jeans. I saw only 3 other females there, who all worked at the place. Left empty handed, but not before I took the walk of faith, as if like watching a horror movie, and keeping my head straight, squealing and eee-ing like annoying females should be. When at the carpark, they were putting this BIG fish on the floor and I was so curious that I decided to look, though I felt a bit nauseous, I decided to be brave and made a conversation with the uncle. I was thinking of buying  a fish for Minibean’s porridge, but I probably wouldn’t dare to hold it. And then, venturing on. *** I remember when I was in kindergarten, I would have came out tops if not for the fact that I was shuttering between JB and Singapore so often that my attendance was compromise. Once, the incentive for the one who topped the class, was a trip to a nearby swim park, which was probably THE swim park back then. I have always wanted to go to the swim park. The teacher eventually got me to go as well, but because of the 60 day visa rule, I couldn’t. I cried, and I begged and I insisted. My parents relented and I remember on the day, I took a camera and snapped a picture of my dad crossing his arms and smiling at me. I found the place yesterday. It was no longer what it was, but had became a small fishing/prawning village, still buzzing with life at 2am in the morning. It was… very comforting when I realised where it had been. And then it was a great experience at the village. I didn’t Tang dynasty had been demolished. I had assumed it was just abandoned like it always was. I was almost burned out from the week, and with uncertainty looming, it was as good as the Friday could get. Oh, in the midst of stress last night, I had almost forgotten that what was triggered by my purchase impulse is here?!?! I shall go get it today. Whoooooooppppppppeeeee Doooo! Yippieeee yay! 0 hotstuff like this post. Like  iLike! Now there is a button to like the entry, just like how you like a facebook status! Quite redundant, but, since I am a big-fan of Like button in facebook, here it is Oooo… I liiiikkkkeee. Wheeeee! Edit: Bummer, it doesn’t seem to work, laughs. So the tech-idiot in me is still trying to figure it all out. Bah. 0 hotstuff like this post. Like  City of Lakes - Day 1 I have a hard time concentrating and staying awake this morning for yet another day of early, full-day meeting. The aching in the body is definitely NOT helping. I downed 4 pieces of Snickers/Toblerone mini, after 3 pieces of kaya/butter toast, hoping that I have some kind of sugar high to keep me going. They did a miraculous job though I suspect one stick of cancer culprit did help. *** Finally, I am gonna start (by right, I should be posting it in its entirety, but I sure delay until moo moo comes home) on the recap on Hanoi trip. It was good to be on such a chilled work trip, which left plenty of fresh memories to last me for a long, long while. It was a busy morning when I took a cab ride that cost more than 40 bucks to the airport (SERIOUSLY?!), and met up with the rest of the colleagues there. Shopped around for 2 bottles of red wine each, and we ended up looking like a alcohol smuggling syndicate with enough alcohol to drown Sentosa. The flight was only enough for me to watch one and half movie, and thankfully I didn’t get bored with Krisflyer’s help, before I entered a world nothing like I had ever been before. *** Hanoi is quaintly beautiful, there is still an air of innocence about it, but it was just scorching hot during the days when we were there. The only fortunate thing was we weren’t trapped in the flood due to the heavy rain storms the day before I reached, and the day after I left. The rice field made me feel like walking around it barefooted, though I didn’t have the chance to do it. I made a comment how some of the structures reminded me of the quieter part of Russia. On the way, we passed by the Red River, flanked by tiny small houses, and it was a picture of exotica. Couldn’t wait to get to the hotel, and it surely didn’t disappoint, as we resided on one of the lakes in the famed city of lakes. (The picture of the hotel’s view in the centre, the guy with the piggies and us eating are courtesy of Ian Tan) The hotel is really cosy, and there were woven baskets on the lake which made us wonder if we could row ourselves in them, but decided I probably couldn’t balance. The massage pavilion was luxuriously pretty, though I couldn’t part with the money to splurge on a well-needed massage. Upon arrival, we were greeted by the welcome team, and we checked into our room which comes with an attached balcony that opened up to a picturesque Westlake. We got changed, and it was exploration time around Hanoi city centre. *** One thing about Hanoi is, the traffic is infinitely intimidating. And the honking NEVER stops. It is almost like a traffic offense if you don’t! It would still ring in your ears the moment you get away from the noise pollution, and I am just glad our hotel was tucked nicely away from all the buzz, and was very resort-ish with a nice pool that we couldn’t wait to dive into for a fulfilling dip. We were almost wondering if there were any traffic lights in Hanoi, and we excitedly pointed out one when we finally saw one. And I even saw a shop called “Scarlett - The Stylish Mum“, ahem, what a shameless plug! Our first stop was Dong Xuan Market, but being a non-shoppy person, I walked away empty-handed, and was having a free sauna treat by the burning Hanoi weather, to the extend I had to bun up my hair with a pen I found in my bag. It also made the trip to Hanoi make-up redundant, laughs. We walked for the longest time, with 2 NS-trained men leading us the wrong ways, before we got to Hoan Kiem Lake. We took a cab to an air-conditioned mall to buy slippers/shorts, after being told the sneakers and jeans we brought were a tad too “formal” for the ballroom meeting sessions. Though surprised, but gee, absolute good news man! Finally had a nice dinner with some of the others joining us, and we couldn’t wait to get back to the hotel for a nice, long shower to rinse the stickiness. It was breezy, and absolutely cooling in the peaceful night of Hanoi (picture courtesy of Ian Tan again!), and the moon was beautiful. Finally got into the showers, love the bathroom, though Marina Mandarin’s in KL still rocks. I hid in the room and did a bit of work, surfed a little, and just stared into the far distance, lit by the night light, and its reflection dancing in the lake. That was just before, the heavy downpour came as suddenly as it went. 0 hotstuff like this post. Like  Long Some things are better off long, but today’s meeting is not one of them. Nonetheless, it has been a good meeting thus far, and all’s good My neck and back are already aching from the light exercises given to me, and I was heaving and panting from them when I had written them off, thinking “OH SO SIMPLE!“. Tsk tsk. When I woke up with the aches… I realise age really did catch up with me. Signs of “growing up” - sniggers. Maybe, just a little wiser. Have to keep up with the perseverance of this, since this is one of the areas I have really wanted to fix. *** I sprinted to the lift after being caught in heavy traffic today, and nothing much for the day, though I just, really, really want to head home to read, and write, after a long, good, relaxing shower. I think the kitchen should be done by today, or latest, tomorrow. Counting down to dinner time (we had lunch around the conference table cos time is tight for the 8am - 6pm meeting), though I doubt I would have the energy to sustain the karaoke session thereafter. Had to do a report and I was seriously contemplating typing it in wordpress cos I am a tad mentally constipated at the moment. But so ironic! The moment I started this post, not knowing what to write, I ended up typing so much bullshit. Oh oh! Today I came to work wearing my cardigan inside out, buttons inside and tag and seams on the outside. I didn’t even realise it until 2 hours later (!!!). There is one real bummer though. Having something on each week of September means my honeymoon with Miss Jeles C can’t take place anytime soon. Okay, will add more if I am going to get bored-er. 0 hotstuff like this post. Like  Dinner Got home straight from work after multiple meetings today. Minibean then followed me into my room, while my mum took the chance to take a breather and head out for dinner. It was almost 8 plus when she got back with claypot rice, taro paste, and tangyuan with peanut soup. She lured Minibean into the room with the cheese bread, so I could have some personal space to finish my dinner. When I tried to peek into the desserts bag, I asked what it was. Taro paste, and tangyuan, she said. Oh, nice, I want to try the taro paste, and yay, tangyuan. Then she continued, “cos you like the tangyuan, right?” I felt all warm and fuzzy. Got all teary. And then, I know, it is moments like this, that stopped me from doing the absolute. *** So I had the claypot rice. Half of the taro paste, and half of the tangyuan. Now, I am gonna have an entire Aston’s chicken burger to myself. Burp. By the way, which one of you have been searching for “joewei taking a dump“, “scarlett ting taking a dump“? I really don’t know why you need the information for, but you can drop me an email for me to … er, update you whatever you are missing out. Hohoho. *** Coincidentally, this morning, I thought of some of the plushies I used to have, and there is this really ugly pink Power Ranger toy, which I supposed is a “pirated” version. I remember she saw it at an amusement fair near our place, and then she played a game just to get it… for me, or so I would like to think so. It was ugly, I thought back then, but it was one toy I never want to throw away, just like my first Barbie doll. *** When I got back today, the construction work was still going on, and I walked in to see that she was crying cos she was scolded for being naughty. The moment she saw me, she crawled towards my arms, and I lie her down on my chest as I sat on the couch. She leaned her tiny body on my chest and drew close , manja-ing. She was just hiding, looking so pitiful as I cradled her and wiped her tears away. I took a flower and amused her. It was only minutes before she sprung up smiling with tear streaks and back to her mischievous ways. After showering, I lay in bed today and did some reading, and Minibean placed her head on my shoulder and pulled a Jeffrey Archer book and pretended to read. Oh did I mention I bought SEVEN more books today?! And then I kicked myself for not buying No country for Old Men. She was quiet throughout and it was as if she really knew what she was reading as she just snuggled up next to me, and we made small conversations that didn’t make sense. She shifted around and put her head on my chest, my tummy, occasionally bugging me to make her milk, and then later, requested for some water. There was this part as we just sitting together and I was reading, she suddenly sat up, kissed me on my cheeks and then said chirpily, “I WUFFF YOU..” (she still can’t pronounce L very well). There was this part she made me angry when she threw something into my glass of water and I kept very quiet, she sprung onto the bed and then threw her arm round my neck and lean her head on my back from behind, just like how I would piggyback her, just that she is doing it like a hug. There was this part I said I wanna nap for a little while cos I was incredibly tired, and I manja-ed her back, baby-voiced and all “Why you never sayang me oneeeee…” and she started stroking my arm.. she then whispered a low, “Sayang...” She then insisted on pulling my spectacles from my face, so that I could rest. I had wanted to blog about the amazing things she had been doing, but the list has grown so long and is drafted somewhere. Busy week ahead, hope to have a lil more me-time for myself. *** It may just be something so unrealistic thought out by us in our moments of boredom, but it is good to dream again, isn’t it? When we are old maids, and have wrinkly nehs (can’t be saggy cos we no have), I think we can be proud to say that, at least, we had the courage to dream. And how very big, it was. Lovingly, your sleepy armpit. 0 hotstuff like this post. Like  Apples and hearts Was so incredibly tired this morning when I woke up to the preparation works to a week of minor rejuvenation works to the kitchen, and converting the bathtub in my parents’ room to a shower cubicle, cos it has became increasingly inconvenient for Dad to shower in the tub as he is getting on age. Age does not so pleasant things to you, and though you feel a little achy to look at him conceding that he is into a late phase in his life, it is just a relief to see him dealing with it with ample strength and with barely any hint of denial. I dozed off in all my cab rides today and it was meeting after meeting today, before I made another trip to SIM again. The day finally concluded when I finally found the perfect remedy after dumping my uber cute chiropractor after finding the almost $6000 upfront payment a little hard to swallow. I found a physiotherapist who found the time, the patience, the expertise to make me feel at ease with the consultation and recommendations, and of course doesn’t made me spit my tongue out at the exorbitant “chop people put fire” pricings. It is just the beginning of the sessions, but as I heal along, I will perhaps share my experience and have a more detailed write up about it, and for any physio needs in the future, you guys might want to consider her marvellous service! Ask me! Ask me! *** Had dinner with a lovely, lovely couple who had tried their best to put me at ease. I realise I still do feel slightly socially inapt. It was almost hard for me to feel fit in. But they are really one of the sweetest couples I ever came across. The Japanese food stall was fabulous! Thank you, Yi Lin & Jeremy *** Boooooooooks! I mentioned how I bought many $5 books from the roadshow at SIM, and here are some of my loots! Everything at $5! I ended up returning today and got myself 3 more books cos that was all the cash I had on me. I had selected many, but could only lug 3 with me. Bah. The thing is, I don’t even have the time to read these days, and my reading debt is growing as much as my writing debt. A friend asked me why don’t I get an e-book reader instead, but I really like books in physical form. I always say the very essential thing for me to have in my own home next time, will be a book shelf and a comfortable, lazing/reading corner, which will oversea the nightview out there. Now I just have to make do with a small shelf next to my door… and I am thinking I can pass all down to Minibean in the future! *** And this, is Zhi Yu. Shadow is a lil weird, but I was just happy to see her again after all these years, and the moment of the chanced meeting was truly, classic. And that’s the new hair I gotten on Wednesday, after telling the stylist, just do anything to it and surprise me. I think I am so bored with it that nothing truly surprises me cos I had bangs already.. though not with curls. But at least, something different and I kinda like it when the bangs are not blocking my vision. *** Oh oh! On Wednesday, I read about this cute tote from Bagaholicboy’s blog, and I thought how cute it is! Of course, being the absolute cheapo I am, I was thinking that this would be a perfect light-weight shopping bag, and one that would do a brilliant job of carrying those nappies, milk bottles, and the likes. It comes FREE with the purchase of the magazine, which costs $27.50. Of course, I have yet to even flip through it. I called up Takashimaya branch, it was sold out, I called up Liang Court, and it too, was sold out. I called up Bugis branch, and they put me on hold while they checked…. … *awaits with bated breath* THEY HAVE ONE LAST PIECE LEFT! What are the chances? I reserved it and went down to collect on my way to SMU for a meeting. The lady before me, who is carrying a Longchamp bag, had kindly offered me her Kinokuniya card, and it only costs me $22! She is so nice can?! That day really made me feel like so thrilled, and like got good karma like that Then I secretly felt immensely guilty for poking fun at people with Longchamp bags (I AM SORRRRRRRYYYYY!!! DON’T STONE ME!!!). Woops. Here it is! Like a mini-reveal. Couldn’t wait to actually unwrap it in the cab so I could dump all my excess stuff into it. Japanese has a knack for making things look so pretty! I would have made it look like a wet market bag! And.. .. the box it came in! It is just such a cheery bag. I went for my hair cut after work and the lady at the reception asked me how much did I pay for my bag cos she finds it really cute and that she really likes it. 22 bucks! Got myself some lurveee and apples! *** The Marc Jacob bag has another fan. Some sugary pictures are coming up, don’t say I didn’t warn you! Got back from work last night with her running to the hall and happily lugging my bag along. But that didn’t seem to be enough for her before she dug out this…. … and kept her balance on the chilli heels! Pardon the PJs, but that’s what my mum dressed her in. Tsk tsk. *** She squashed my nose when I wanna kiss her. Giggles. Trying to cut away the clutter at the back, with bloated tummy from the gastro orgasm of seafood last night! One act cute, another act blur. Both acting cute She looked up to me and asked, “Can I sleep with you tonight, Mama?  I want to sleep together with Mama.“ How sweet is that? And that, really, made my night. 0 hotstuff like this post. Like  Gastro orgasm Gastro orgasm. *Burp* What a day. *** Reunion with someone from so many years ago, someone whose life was one I had one day followed on the papers, and my heart went all out to her, and.. when I finally saw her, our eyes met before I launched into a loud “Oh MY GOD!” She stared at me at a good few seconds longer, before her smile of politeness became one of acknowledgement. There isn’t much people from the past that would make me want to immediately pull them into my embrace, but she was definitely such. I was just so glad to find her again after all these years. We caught up. I teared. We aged. We perhaps are looking at the same direction right now to establish something for ourselves and everything is secondary. It is an learning opportunity, and I filtered things for myself that I hope to take the positive and cast out the negative, just like the way she did. It is just like this event, a chance to network, and establishing relationships with people from different trades, different industry. Sometimes, we have to humble ourselves before we can reap and open up the minds for the endless possibilities out there. People judge too soon, and maybe that’s why the circle they drew for themselves and lock themselves in, is one they wouldn’t, not couldn’t, come out from. I can’t control what people want to say, but I can control who I have around me, she said. She held my hand very tight when we parted after we sat down at the lounge area. How do you catch up 12 years of parting, loss, heartaches, crises. And then you realise, it is not the juvenile shit people talk about. The ironic thing is, as I chanted about sensitivity yesterday and how walking away is the polite thing to do, I totally forgotten about sensitivity as I went on about what she had missed out in my life, when I touched on a topic that was potentially painful for her. I hope she doesn’t read this, cos it might be painful, but at the same time, I admire her strength. She is someone who touched me greatly. Cancer, single-motherhood, social stigma, suicide, loss, hope. I will never forget the day when I read the papers and saw her a picture of devastation and I cried in disbelief, when her mother was bugged so much by what people say, how people judged, that she ended her life on the MRT tracks to prove her innocence. And her mother, I remember, was one of the coolest, and sweetest mothers of my friends. It took just one moment of rashness. One moment of hopelessness. One moment. *** I think that’s the reason why I love trade shows. Started from one. The first one. The Starhub one. The one chance I will never thank enough for an once-friend. Then, the GP one, for another once-friend. This time, I helped out at SBB(yes, THAT one, I can almost see the disappointment with me/scorns on your faces, depending on who you are)’s company, and I would say what I bartered for is pretty worth it. The other day, a friend of mine asked me what it could potentially mean, and I told her I kinda knew what was going to happen, but it was going to be inevitable. Will it affect me? I knew what was coming, and what else can I do even if so? It sounds cliche… but clear conscience? I say I have, if you don’t like me, you naturally wanna find an excuse to not like me and would rather think otherwise. If you started reading my blog not liking me, or gradually started to grow intense dislike for me, ah hah! I have all the fodder you need now, right? Like strike 4D! But with that mental preparation was what made things good, cos indifference, can be a good thing, and what everyone is trying to strive towards, isn’t it? Like someone wise (ahem ahem, yours truly) once said, time is the essence for indifference. Seriously I tell you I ain’t affected, you also think I bullshit you, but then the myriads of emotion were came quick and swift, then it became almost nothing (now you know what the previous post is about) and sometimes you feel affected cos you assume you will feel affected. Then you start asking yourself, “Eh, aren’t I supposed to feel affected?” Then when you don’t, you start to wonder where it is, then you start to wonder do I, do I not? Is it there? Then why cannot find it?  Then you like search for it and questioned if you are doing such a good job fooling yourself as well. The element of disbelief. Not unlike when you have been waiting for you sex change op for the longest time, and when you finally do it, you wake up to make sure your kkj is no more, and you wonder if it could be so fast and easy, and the accomplishment of it all. I did feel affected briefly, like how people who go through traumatic event of being bitten and then there is a reminder (eh, like how I choked on fishball, I will be extra cautious about fishball and its choking potential) but nothing personal or the extreme way you or me would think it would be. Then you just concede this gotta happen someday (ahem, like a certain house party…) , and you are just heave a sigh of relief that there was no bitterness. And like I said last night to Clar, that it was actually a great relief (though maybe I think too much about the need of sensitivity or else to be misunderstood of being doing things on purpose), and then the understanding of why and how it was a much needed closure for everyone. Though sometimes, you can’t control how you life is a show for others who are interested. *** A question a friend recently went through heartache gave me a choice, “Bitterness or hurt?” I say I wonder if I would wish to hang on to more bitterness to speed the healing, to kill off everything. I feel… safer that way. But very hard to brew and then try to fuel it to keep up with it. And the former is a choice. Forgiveness could perhaps come easy, but maybe it is a choice we want to fight, cos that’s how defence mechanism work, isn’t it? So complicated and complex. Tsk! I guess it is good that I don’t need to pretend I am often angry with myself the most. I am strangely emotive sometimes, and that is often quite an open-book to read that those who leave hostile messages were quick to identify and know the vital points to hit, and I almost am the one who hands the ammunition to those who dealt low blows. You may not understand, you may not agree, you may be frustrated, you may assume, you may be disappointed (yes, you, I miss you), you could feel pain for me.. but I really just wanna find the openness, again and not care who is reading, and fuck sensitivity and fuck self-protection (haha, I say only, I am the laziest bitch to crawl out of comfort zone to be out in the open these days). Like. I cry, I laugh, I falter, I fume, I bitch, I burp, I pluck my armpit hair the way I do them best. And it is very therapeutic! I am not trying to win (unless in 4D, Mahjong, Casino and Toto!), cos I am well aware this isn’t a game and I don’t like to compete, nor do I wanna ra-ra to the point just to convince anyone anything, but it has became something I truly do not want to think about. Escapism, denial, anything, or just sheer money-making crazy and busy to be thinking deep. There too, is nothing to brag (unless I get a Longchamp bag, sorry, sorry, inside joke!), nothing to hide (some readers who emailed me had gotten honest answers from me), though sometimes, the more you say, or the less you say, get you into the same trouble. Like the above, it could cover various areas, and depending on who you are, and what you want to read, you get different perspective of what it really, really means. This post is getting me there, methinks. *** The funniest thing happened when I approached a chap to ask him for help, when I saw his name tag, I was like, “Oh gosh. You are the only stranger on my facebook.” Someone who mis-added me and I mis-added him thinking he is a friend. And what a strange way to meet. So shy! Of course, there are many funny shyshy moments…. *** I met a Malaysian girl who couldn’t speak much English and we conversed mainly in Mandarin. It was an interesting chanced encounter, and somehow her down-to-earthness struck me and you know how you can randomly meet someone, and it just… I don’t know, you just wanna protect her kind? She was uncertain, and a lil insecure. We didn’t talk anything personal, we just spoke of opinions and topics we aren’t even sure of. Before she went off, her eyes lit up and said, “You know, it is very interesting talking to you.. and I look forward seeing you again” It is not sexual attraction, alright? It was just.. like we both found a safe place to feel kinda belonged, kinda relaxed and just, relate. I didn’t even get her name. All things, I believe, happen for a reason. *** It was a chilly night, and I was dozing off at the table while the guys attacked the crabs. Do you know the smallest Australian King crab weighs at least 3 kg and it would cost $400-500 for one?! *** The biggest surprise and nicest thing is when I got home and the little thing ran into my arms. Though the not-so-good news is Dad is having an infection from his previous surgery (yes, been a blardy long time, I know), but it was such a pleasant night to just talk to him and us sharing sweet little tidbits of the little one that made us laugh. I felt a sudden urge to hug him and just tell him how much I love him and how grateful I am to him. Even when speaking to Mum, I managed to make her laugh. Minibean kept kissing me, and then insisted on putting on the red heels and picking up my bag to parade around the hall. And no, I still can’t find it within me to say yes though I have too much of a problem saying no. Boom! I am hearing the thunder out there and despite it will probably hinder me from drying my laundry I just did after a long day, I like this kind of rainy day. I survived today! Surprisingly that I did, though in the morning all the emergency phone calls nearly made me have to find a contigency plan. But! Everything went well, and I coped better than I thought I did. On the heels, I was able to survive on the Salonpas on my lower back. Speaking to strangers, somehow, more at ease with myself. No pressure. Co-ordinating something else happening elsewhere, no sweat. Overcoming weaknesses, I will give myself a A plus despite initial hiccups. Sometimes maybe you have to expect the unexpected and be prepared for the worst, to make yourself realise how ready you are, and there really, is, nothing much for you to feel uncertain, after you have overestimated the effect things have on you. Such a strange, strange day. *** It is a long day at InvestFair today, and met one of the vendors I was interested to tie-up with for an upcoming project was there, and we started joking and bantering about certain things, before another lady joined in for the conversation. We then realised we have common friends and we spoke about my primary school ex-classmates who is her colleague. I also bumped into my ex-schoolmate, who was from the same college from me in UK! An ex-colleague from Manulife. Uma was doing some coverage there as well, and plenty of pleasant people at the fair. Too busy to take pictures today though. Will make up for it somehow. I got myself new lenses cos my eyes are too dry from the previous brand and it is a VAST improvement from the previous brand though I expected this to be dryer. I finally got my first meal at 10pm. As usual, fried, greasy, comfort food. Yum! Too tired to continue, another early day tomorrow. Thank God it is sporty tomorrow, and off go sashaying in heels and corporate wear! Goooooooooodddnight, and time to give my chowchow some TLC, and enjoy the rain tonight. By the time I finish tomorrow, it will be Monday ambushing me, so, an early night it shall be then. Note: WHY AH? TWITTER AND FACEBOOK BOTH CANNOT POST MESSAGE. Grrrr! Bookworm Did anyone realise I cannot count?! I just realise my maths fail! I had $4.15 cents with me, and I needed to pay $5.35 cents. So that’s $1.20. But why did I keep thinking I had $3.15 on me? So silly. *** Too busy/too tired to blog. Have to wake up early on weekend is so NOT fun, but for the dough, especially in such times, is something I shouldn’t be complaining. Now my blog debt includes: 1) Peining’s wedding 2) Hanoi trip 3) Minibean’s post 4) My PMS cravings (I actually made a list when I was hungry and sulky!) I was hungry yesterday and after a long, long day, and went to one of the places that used to serve my PMS cravings. Alas, they changed chef. Boohoo. I had foie gras for starters but had to make do with a main course that was substandard. I got home and finished my bacon bak gwa, and dug the fridge for SINS chocolate while watching Nanny, and finally got to sleep after that. I am suspecting I am about to get bacon off my body some time soon. It was a long, long day. I was almost wondering if I could pull through. *** Oh oh! If you love books as much as, or more than I do, Popular is having a mini roadshow at SIM from today onwards till next Friday (Sunday closed). All the brand new bestseller titles are going at $5 ONLY! There are kiddy books that are amazingly cute and cost the same. There are many titles that I saw that are really new, like The White Tiger, and the classics like Jane Austens, and popular authors like Dan Brown, Haruki Murakami, Jeffrey Archer, John Grisham, Jodi Picoult, Nora Roberts and many more, and even the bigass, large-sized books are going at $5 only! I fisted my chest when I saw my Catch 22 and Piano Teacher, and at least 10 books that I had bought at retail price in the past couple of years. Heartpain man! I lugged back 8 books cos that’s all I could afford to pay cash for yesterday, and that was only after waiting for them to unpack half of what are gonna be displayed. It was an evening of easy conversation, surprisingly. I spoke of my friends, and the traits of them I so adore, but somehow.. how I often grow fearful. Fear is something I have to let go. I have till year end to start building on my confidence. Sometimes it is strange, you think you can do it, yet when serious self-doubt seeps in, you just feel you want to give up and don’t want to pull through anymore. Oh. And I told Claris it is strange how we knew each other for almost 7 years, but we only met briefly at a trade show I worked at, and spoke on the phone less than 5 times, and I believe all 5 times were during some kind of crisis in our lives. Strange ah. Okay, work time. Byebye. Can what’s lost be found? Woke up to the same nagging back pain, and rest in bed most of the day. Despite finding the slots to the SD card reader, it doesn’t work at all! Grrr…. I was almost going to make this post a complain-y one, because just when I thought I got through today relatively incident-free, and then, something just gotta happen. Bah! Because of the pain, I decided to head down to my chiropractor, and ran an errand along the way. I used my light-weight “shopping” bag today and transferred just the important identifications and cards from the work bag. After waiting for 20 minutes to make a general enquiry, I waited for a further 20 minutes to get served. Alas, I wasn’t informed that I have to pay cash or NETS. For those who don’t know, I am one of the few rare species in Singapore who DOES NOT own a NETS card, and depend heavily on its more evil plastic siblings when I have to make cashless payment. And because I had headed out with a different bag, I have very limited cash on me. When I say limited, I mean, really, really, limited. Three dollars and fifteen cents to be exact. Cos when I was about to make payment, I was ONE DOLLAR AND TWENTY CENTS short. AHHHHH! I would have no problems digging out coins from my usual bag from my habit of throwing loose change into my bag randomly. My farewell gift from my previous workplace (which I had wanted to blog about but never got down to doing it….. ) was an LV Vernis coin wallet in Amarante, has recently double up as a card holder. Time to do some spring cleaning to my bags, and remind myself to get some cute make-up pouch to compartmentalise my bag. I need more systems in place, methinks. So. I was short of a mere $1.20 after clearing the entire bag of coins. The lady at the counter told me she could proceed for me, but I would have to return tomorrow to pay for the balance. So my poor $3.15 is now held in ransom, and I can’t figure out how her colleagues are gonna remember the loo.. loser who owes $1.20. Seriously. I hope I have the time to sort it out tomorrow. *** So I finally went back for a review, but I seriously don’t think I can afford his services, which would require me to pay a lump sum(no instalment plans! The audacity!) for it. I know I am quite the spendthrift these days, but for me to fork out almost $6k in cash at this moment just seem.. impossible. I mean, I believe the money will be well-spent with my constant problems, but the lack of flexibility to their payment plans made it impossible for me to commit. Unfortunately, the female sale staff made me feel she was a lil cut-throat despite the chiropractors are pretty professional. She seemed pretty disinterested right after I expressed how the financial inflexibility made it impossible for me to commit. (Speaking of the word “pretty”, I made an ultimate booboo the other day with a meeting with my boss and when he asked me to tell him about myself, I thought for a long while before I went, “I think I am pretty….. uhm..” I couldn’t find the exact words, and I found him staring at me mid-sentence, amused. He then laughed, “I thought you are telling me you are pretty!” I blushed a bright hue of scarlet, and flusteredly waved my hands to insist that wasn’t what I meant and that I hadn’t finish my sentence. DUH! I am such a bimbo!) Anyway, I was glad I said no, though I know I would like to sort out my spine problems. I then took back my X-rays, in case I would like to look for another more affordable chiropractic clinic, preferably with some sort of instalment plans. It reminded me of a friend not-too-long ago, who had kindly offered to help but…  pride is always an issue, isn’t it? Okay, selectively sometimes though. *** Walked around IMM before settling down for some food. I tweeted how I am craving for bak gua, mee siam and aglio olio from Bakerzin, and I bought Bak Gua! Yay. So happy! I then headed to Cafe Cartel for pasta, and while I was waiting, I actually listed down some PMS food I was happy to indulge in. By the time I finished the list, I thought I could almost blog an entire post about it, which I will, later! From the work calls, my phone was flat by dinner time. And since I was in the clinic, I had earlier switched it to silent mode. I had baked pasta and I almost licked the last drop of cream off the plate, before I happily headed for home by cab in the evening. *** It was perhaps one of the few times I board a blue cab without paying the fare with credit card, and it was the first time in many months I didn’t ask for a receipt at the end of the brief cab ride. I checked my watch. Wow. 7.30pm, time certainly went by a tad too quickly today. I went off the cab, not before reminding uncle he gave me $1 change short. He said he remember putting a dollar in it, but I just held my hands out, which I was afraid he thought I was out to cheat him. But he was polite so I said thank you chirpily before making my way into the building. I then emptied the content from my bag, then realised my phone wasn’t with me. But you know, me being me being me…. I always thought I lose something and then I will find it like in my hands, in my pockets, or sitting on it. Then I searched, and searched. Nowhere to be found. Called up Cafe Cartel, not found. I don’t normally lose my phone despite being such a muddle-head (in fact, I have NEVER lost my phone before), cos I usually entertain myself on cabs with it. But since it was flat, I didn’t. I called the customer service line but they were closed for the day. I went online to make an online submisstion to find their forms are error-filled and it couldn’t load at all! So I called the booking hotline, and they put me on hold for 10 minutes until I could wait no more cos I needed to take a dump. I was ready to rant at them for the poor service. I brought my home phone into the showers and called again. I did whatever I needed to do.. shower, scrub my face, scrub my body… and then, a voice came on. So in the midst of my showers, I made a report. I didn’t rant cos she sounded nice and knew what she was doing. I remember the pick up time cos I checked my watch, I remember the exact fare cos of the change mistake. But I don’t remember the cab number nor was it the newer/older cab model. I was feeling a bit bleak about it, and was ready to lose it, though I was thinking it was just the revenge of my phone on me having straying thoughts earlier today (Hmm.. should I get a blackberry instead?) after seeing Potato’s tweet. I was just thinking about my Gucci handphone strap which I like though. I was hoping I will get it back since I always return wallets/phones to others. Strangely enough, right after my showers, I actually waited less than I had to do earlier, before I got a call back from Comfort. HHAAAAALLLEEELLLLUUUUJJJAAAAHHH! They managed to track the very kind Mr Chua, of SHC1692K, and said he has it with him, and they gave me his mobile number to establish contact with him, but informed me that he was at… Changi Airport (!!!). So I called, but he didn’t pick up, and I assumed he was driving. I finally got him after more than 2 hours, cos I had called the customer service back again and they managed to get hold of him. I offered to go to wherever it is convenient for him (and tip him!) but he was so nice to tell me he will send it back if I can wait since he stays nearby! Such a sweetheart! I heaved a big sigh of relief cos to me I am okay with losing my phone, but just thinking of what a bitch it is to replace it when I will be busy all through the weekend makes me very… sian. So for every bad experience with cab driver, there will be one who is pleasant! I shall be nice and wait for uncles who lose their ways next time and be patient with rude uncles! FML no more! Oh, and I managed to upload the pictures using my home notebook’s SD card reader. -beams- Okay, I just remember I did lose my phone once before in the cab and the passenger arranged for me to pick it up from him from the MRT station once. Sorry darling phone, I will love and treasure you more from now on, just don’t reset on me again, okay? *** I am having Bakerinz Aglio Olio now, though it is less than 3 hours since me almost eating the plate to my creamy, baked pasta. And I shall have my bacon strips bak gua as desserts. Shuddap. I know what you are thinking. Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! I awe myself Like seriously! I had wanted to blog earlier on about my good karma today, but then I grew too tired and decided to just stay paralysed underneath my duvet, peeking at History channel in between staring my armpit in the face (plucking armpit hair again, what else?). I think I get some brilliant kick out of keeping my armpit smooth. Cos, at the end of it, I felt energetic enough to spring out of my bed and got myself ready to unveil a little surprise for myself today (nothing special but stilllllllllll makes me cheery!). I tried to upload the pictures, but my camera just wouldn’t connect to my desktop, which is a common problem with this particular camera. I tried, and tried, and tried. Until I was just incredibly annoyed. I tried searching for the SD card plug-in reader which has became Minibean’s toy. You know, it is funny, when she was playing with it, I ALWAYS see it around, but when I start to look for it high and low, in the hall and in the room (note to self, please check the curtains are drawn when you decide to prance around the house naked), I will NEVER find it. Then I gave up after sustaining a few mosquito bites. I decided to sulk and brace myself for some hormonal torment by indulging in a box of dark chocolate, with the sole aim to finish it. Like I said it on tweeter, I wanted to polish off all of it and dive straight into the warm embrace of obesity. Then, on a sugar high, I tried to plug and unplugged my camera x 50 times, and it still wouldn’t give in to me. HMPHHHHHHHHHHHFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF. And in my annoyance, I cursed and wished I had my work notebook with me (which is damn stupid, cos at this VERY moment, I just remember I DO HAVE MY PERSONAL NOTEBOOK WITH ME WHICH I CONVENIENTLY FORGOT I OWN) so I could just plug the SD card into its reader. Such convenience. And then I grumbled to myself how inconvenient it is that my desktop is so incompetent and if only it comes with SD card reader. Then, suddenly, something struck me. “Could it have a reader which I do not know of?” I shifted it around. … .. . Yup. You guessed it. Like all things in my life. OH MY GODDDDDDDDDDDDDD. After paying 2 years of installment for this thing that sleeps beside me every, single night, and me playing with it for hours every, single day… I found the holes I never knew existed. If someone had a camera to capture my expressions from frustrations to revelations, it should be a classic display of Uh-ohness (with narrowed eyes throw in to reproach the doofus in me) plus plenty of guilt. And after 2 years, I finally peeled away the sealed plastic and slot the SD card into the space that only knew emptiness for the past years. It is now tightly filled and perhaps for the first time, reached its puberty. I am sorry my dear desktop, for doubting you, and maligning you when it has been user error all along. Seriously, what took me so long to realise huh? And why it only took me until I started on this post before I remembered I have a notebook with card reader huh? Seriously, I aaaawwwwwwweeeeeeeee myself! How did I manage to get through life like this?! It wasn’t me Okay, I received SMS from my friends to ask me to admit if it was really me in the picture. To illustrate the resemblance, when my friend decided to stir my curiosity by sending me a safe-for-viewing picture, the one that I posted up, and asking if it was me in the picture casually (which I had no idea what was to.. er, come), Minibean was right beside me and then pointed excitedly to the picture, exclaming, “MUUUMMMMYYY!“. I had to try to remember if I ever wore such clothes, or ever owned such a bag.. or even to be somewhere which looks remotely like… that. I sent the little one away and then left an entire of folder unviewed pictures till the next day, before I took my time to skim through some, and heaved a big sigh of relief to see some of the pictures really don’t look like me. They then asked for more damning evidences, so that they can pay for my services burn me at the stake. I decide to fulfil their wishes here, but then I got shy (yes, I know how to be shy too. See me blushhhhhh), despite I had cropped the picture to be safer for workplace consumption, and parents who catch their children reading this wouldn’t think I am whoring (cough, pun not intended) my services. So I will just post the link to some of the pictures that show more resemblance, rather than those that show too obvious a depiction of her face that give away her identity. So I shall just link them (a part of me feels as if I am posting pictures of myself! So strange!) Another one Plus another! I have a similar necklace to hers, which I no longer wear. Still, it wasn’t me. Ting does a Shaggy and sings: But she caught me on the counter (It wasn’t me) Saw me bangin’ on the sofa (It wasn’t me) I even had her in the shower (It wasn’t me) She even caught me on camera (It wasn’t me) It wasn’t me! But really!!!!! Seriously!! Honestly!! Som pah!! Cross my heart!! I wouldn’t pay to do myself, ya know? Of course, me being me being myself, sometimes I have no choice but have to do myself, highly dependent on the aid of batteries. I ain’t a whore! I have never been to cheap, sleazy hotels! (okay, not locally which has Channelnewsasia on television) I insist on hotels with bathtubs! How fun would that be? I never did a Vanessa Hudgens… oh wait a minute. I don’t have a forest down there that could make the search of the gems as much of a breeze like Expedition Amazonas. I never sleep with anyone to earn a new bag for myself! Never! *** How did I survive Tuesday?! I don’t remember! It started with me having a breakfast meeting, and I have no idea what to order. I was swinging between Prata with curry or Century Egg porridge. In the end, oily, spicy, sinful curry prevailed, and in true, blue, typical female fashion……. … I REGRETTED NOT ORDERING MEE SIAM! I wanted to pack an extra set of breakfast cos I downed my breakfast faster than the other 2 men, and was still hungry. Until someone reminded me that unless I am trying to grow into the size of my doppelgänger… and that stopped me in my tracks. *** I don’t know how time passed, but then I had to rush to get things done in one of my outlets. Thankfully, things went on brilliantly well, and what a relief!! Though I still marvel at how I get through life with such things happening EVERYDAY: I went into an elevator and wanted to get to 2 floors down. I punched the button to head for B2. I pressed at it repeatedly, almost violently before the other passenger in the lift. Bummer, it was not working. And then I realised, I was at B2. I insist I am not to be blamed for the fact. Ahem. Because the top floor of the lift was level 1, and it goes all the way down to B5. I grumbled that the lifts might as well go all the way down to B18. Bah! I looked for the bookstore for a good 20 minutes, getting lost in the compound, and I actually had someone who thought I am a student, asking me for directions, again, looking for the same bookstore as I was. When I was walking back from the bookstore to where I came from, I realised it was only a 2 minutes walk away, and I didn’t have to take the blardy lift! I decided to take a cab back home after a tiring day. I have conveniently forgotten about how school had reopened and it wouldn’t be easy to get a cab. I walked 15 minutes to find somewhere to get a cab. After a long wait, I decided to call for one. After a loooooooooooooonggg wait, the cab driver called to say he was lost. He told me to wait, which I did. It was a long wait. Very long wait.  He still hadn’t found me. While waiting, 6 empty cabs whizzed past and I didn’t want to feel bad about leaving him searching for me in such a remote location, so I waited. He reached. He grumbled how the location wasn’t stated properly. Before XXX building. Right at the bus-stop. Along XX Avenue. I told him that I named all of the above. He then mumbled and said I should have indicated the bus-stop code. Seriously? When I got back, I wanted to pay the fare by credit card. He tsk-ed me impatiently, and shoved the receipt rudely into my hand. I wondered why I bothered waiting in the beginning for him to find me?! For the first time, I didn’t say thank-you to a cab-driver, even though he isn’t the rudest and most annoying cab driver I have ever encounter. Oh, and I tripped and fell in front of a few students, the same ol’ same ol’. I walked the endless steps and complained I am getting old as I heaved and sigh. I fell asleep in front of the monitor when twittering halfway, only to wake up to continue where I left off. And that, sums up the “adventurous” Tuesday of mine. Get-rich quick scheme I think I might have found the perfect way to get rich, and head towards millionaire-dom. And an incentive to be stuck with a cheating scumbag! I call this, the.. ahem, Forgiveness Incentive Program. And MORE incentive to dump a cheating scumbag for someone who would be an even more despicable cheating scumbag! A WIFE’S collection of 43 diamond gifts bought by her millionaire hubby each time he was unfaithful has been sold for £300,000. Businessman Robert Charlton could not stop having affairs but guilt drove him to buy jewels. Wife Elizabeth knew about his flings - yet the bizarre arrangement kept their marriage alive for 26 years until Mr Charlton died at 63 in 1979. All I can say that, if the quality of the diamonds are good, it wouldn’t have been sold this cheaply. I don’t mind looking for such a man, giggles. Maybe I shall hold some kind of bidding process, going by carats… “When I cheat, I buy you 0.2 carat. I will cheat 4 times a year.“ “When I cheat, I buy you 0.6 carat. I will cheat 9 times a year!“ “5 carats! Every week!” DONE! You don’t have to say sorry, just buy me diamonds. But auntie here have yet to find a BFF in diamonds, and diamonds no resale value, so perhaps.. … gold bars? I accept premier watches, Hermes/Chanel bags and property deeds too! For the uninitiated.. The previous picture was of a lady, who shares an uncanny resemblance to me. Some people, who have seen more of the facial shots, are convinced it IS me. I have more pictures to illustrate that, though there were some that probably will prove my “innocence” that it wasn’t me in the picture. Giggles. But then, this is a healthy site (okay, not for your mental/emotional state sometimes, but still…), occasionally laced with lewd innuendos and strewn with too much sailor talks at times, and I have no intention to have you sack if you load the site at work and have plenty of tits and you-know-where bits staring back at you and your neighbouring colleague/boss’ faces. All I can say is, that wasn’t me, but I probably have to whip my panties off to shove it into your faces that I have a very decent haircut somewhere, for you guys to be convinced. Or, from the “patterns“, tsk tsk, yawns, I think I can do a more er…  skilled and convincing “job“. Cough. Background to this: a friend sent me the censored pictures (only strangely, the censorship is to the face, not to graphic bits), and asked if I was moonlighting. I got a shock at the resemblance too, and couldn’t stop laughing, until he “confessed” that it was his escapade that he was sharing. And he claimed she was chosen for her resemblance to… gulp, me. I wouldn’t do me lor! If I am a guy.. Though I still insist, and believe, that was really a brilliant attempt to wind me up. I am NOT convinced, nor do I really think it is him, cos I just think he came across it in the forums or something. He didn’t seem to know the nationality of the said lady in the picture, how can possible? Or else, it means I have seen his kkj. Gasp! My eyesssssssssssssssssssssssssss! Ahhhhhhhh! Caught in the act Does she look… strangely familiar to you? And I will be the first to admit she does. Now. You tell me, look like me or not?! Say it isn’t so…. -Ting does a Bon Jovi- UP - Cross my heart I think this totally deserves a post of its own. Those who know me well know that I am not a fan of watching animated movies in the theatres for various reasons, one of which is I would buy the DVD to watch with Minibean, or that I think that the television could give a more cosy watching experience as I snuggle under the duvet with her. But after hearing all the raving reviews, and reading about this touching story couple of months ago, I decided that giving the movie a shot in the cinema was well justified. Plus, I have a good reason to finally go for my first ever 3D movie experience (minus those from eras before in the science theatres, or theme parks)! So off I went, for the 3D experience. Before the movie started, there is a short 3D animation which is not to be missed. Though I am not sure if it comes with the non-3D animation or not. And at the end of it, I was all teary-eyed, and I want a Carl.. Hereonforth… SPOILERS alert! - The only gripe I have on wearing the special goggles is that… this is a movie which will move you to tears.. and make you weep and you have to keep adjusting it to dry your eyes. It was such a sweet, sweet movie. Of renewed hope, of… so many things. I was just so devastated when they lost the baby, and when she fell on the hillslope, how he worked all his life to make her happy, and after her death, to fulfil the dreams they shared. I know it is just animation, but it was just so awfully sweet to see them grow old together, and the way they looked at each other in the eyes… So full of love, full of adoration. The way he remembers her preferences. Even to the way the way she would like the ornaments to be placed. He always remembers his promise to her, as he crosses his heart whenever he promises her. His gentle soul. And how he decided to live the remaining of his life to the max, just for… her. To her, the adventure of her life, was just.. having a loving, fulfilling life, with him by her side. The moments they shared, were bigger than any of the dreams she ever had. I love the way when he crosses his heart and the look in his eyes, and the smile he flashes. I love the part when the little boy spoke about the rejection from his father, and then as he fell asleep, he asked Carl, “Cross you heart?” I love the part when he reread the album they shared, and found what she had left for him. I love the part whenever he looks at her picture. I also love when the credits rolled, cos I thought it was so clever as they illustrated the crew with an album of Carl’s adventures from then on. Of course, the part when the whole cinema was just shocked into silence, as we mourned together with Carl…. as he lost her. And people were busy with drying their eyes. It just warms you up, and makes you feel again, without defenses. I love the part when the 2 elderlies fought and I laughed hard. I love the part when the rare bird reunited with her family. I rethink what the movie touches me with, and I got all teary. I love the part of the dog’s loyalty. And the part he became an alpha. Hahaha! It is one that will make you smile, make you cry, and make you laugh. And make you treasure whatever you have, and not leave it till it is too late. Lovely, lovely, show. Of renewed hope This is one weekend I truly enjoy, though I had wished it to be a tad longer, so I can have more of me-time before the monitor (yes, I am THAT deprived of a decent social life, by CHOICE, I would like to think. Shuddap, I am not deluded), catch up on the news, blog a little, chew on things a little.. yet by the time I was seated down here, I was too tired or too caught up in the moment to actually do any of those. It is one weekend I could breathe easier, and a much awaited one as a hectic week nearly mowed me down. Well, and next week will be seeing things happening for next 3 weeks, and praying hard that all elements will fall into place. *** It was 1994. I had a best friend I never had prior to that. She left for another school, just after 3 months. I cried badly. Terribly. I never cried so much for a female before. We took different paths and I can say that for the years that followed, our life had panned out very differently. There were chanced encounters that were never in-depth thereafter. I remember she was in love with big earrings and her telling me vivaciously how her classmate would throw balled up pieces of paper through the hoop when lectures get boring. It took many years, and after many different paths we took individually, for us to find each other again, with the gap narrowed. Such, is destiny. *** Nearly made a purchase for investment. I didn’t, and am now kinda kicking myself for it. Sulks. *** I didn’t miss Friday morning’s meeting (I got the meeting room and timing correct! Yay!), though I had to run off in the midst of it for the meeting I had not-so-looked-forward-to, but yet, looked forward to. Ai yah, the usual jitters and shyness, you see. I giggled, and I flustered, and if was an assessment, I would have failed terribly. But, it was totally liberating, though I didn’t manage to get what I had wanted to express out, and it was of great, great relief. And, for someone like me who just like to observe and know someone better, I guess it was interesting. Somhow, it was totally enriching, and a 30-minute crash course of learning, from someone I have ample respect for. Scooted back into the meeting earlier, and it overran for quite a bit, before we concluded it. Had lunch with a couple of colleagues nearby, and I was actually wearing a long-sleeved knitted JPG top(hands-me-down, obviously), over a camisole, zipped up, strolling in the hot sun. Was speaking to my colleague, who grew up in Bangkok, and studied in Manchester, and her amazing experience working in Old Trafford as a waitress and how she had many chances to watch live, home matches. The clincher? She went for the Champions League Final against Bayern Munich in 1999. I could only scream “I HATE YOU!!!!!” repeatedly in awe. But it brought back so much memories as she asked if I had returned ever since my stint there and I mentioned the recent trip back, and she was surprised much of my friends are still there, when she only has one friend who hadn’t returned. Same old, same old. Rushed back to finish some work before hurrying out of the office to do my round-the-island trips, starting with Marine Parade. Engaged with a conversation with the cab driver who went on and on, and full-stopped his sentences with “you know“s. I ended up giggling and replying “I know” to every of his “you know“s. I cursed how it was the wrongest day for me to do the trips as it was kinda warm and I was all wrapped up, and had to enter and exit from the air-conditioned places into the baking open-air so many times in a day. I wasn’t sure why I was having some black0ut spells in between, which could be the result of the nagging backache that had returned after coughing excessively for 3 weeks. The hands-on manual work also contributed to it, though it was still great fun to see things building up and happening. The moment I stepped out of the outlet, I was greeted by a totally different picture. It was raining. Cooler, but it also means that I have to be running from place to place in the rain, and since there wasn’t any shelter, I was waiting for the cab in the rain. Bummer. And with time running out, I ended up returning to office to drop off some of the load that I didn’t want to wet in the rain. A colleague got exasperated and just stood up and said, “Okay, I am done for the day, I will go toy fair instead.” “Eh, wanna go Suntec for toy fair? Now.” I would love to snap up the invite but I looked at the list of places I had to run, and declined. Had been wanting to jalan jalan at the toy fair, but just didn’t manage to lah. Got back to office and a sweet sight greeted me. I don’t think anyone had gotten it right before, and I was pretty surprised someone got it right, like finally. The lady at the reception was cooing about it, and a strange thought came to mind. I feel like asking when is her birthday so I could send her teddy bears and flowers, though seriously, I don’t know her personally at all. But she is just one of those random strangers who could cheer your day up, and you would greet when you do see her. She is one of those people who make tough days… nicer. And it makes me wanna make her day nicer. But people will think I weirdo or not?! Though I have to say, guys never quite manage to get it quite right for me after all these years. Someday, maybe, someday. *** Ended up in the west after a horrendous cab ride and wondered why I am so prone to car-sickness these days, and I made a rush to the place where surprisingly, the in-charge still remembers me! He then commented that I look different, and asked if I speak mandarin cos he remembered that I don’t speak mandarin. I looked at him, totally flabbergasted and said it was totally impossible, before a long conversation erupted in mandarin (though his Johorian accent made me nearly slipped into it. Giggles) as he helped me with some installation. I left midway to make some purchases to deliver for my next stop. Ended up in NTU, and Hallelujah to school reopening! The boys! The atheletic cuties! Y0uth! Vibrant! I am not cougar. As much as my colleagues call me that. *** Got my punani and legs tased again. After a long, tiring day, I actually felt immuned to the ouch-factor. Or perhaps, I was just too masochistic, and enjoyed it. *** Thanks for keeping me in your thoughts, and the sweet messages. :) Things are okay, and will get better, somehow, it will. *** I got home to an awesome Friday evening. I will dedicate an entire post just for it. Utter, utter, precious bliss. It was only until 2 plus in the morning before I managed to get some me-time, and I snuck up and finished some work emails till late, before retiring, being kept awake intermittently, and yet remember each awake moment vividly. It just made me beam silly-ly throughout on Saturday, though it seriously tainted the quality of sleep and the length of sleep I managed to get, but it was well worth it. *** Woken up by the little one on Saturday, to realise that I was just in time for an appointment in the afternoon. She insisted on me showering her and drying her hair, and thus I was almost 40 minutes late when I finally reached. The session was part alright, part excruciating, and I walked into the chilled day, with beautiful breeze when it was almost 5pm. The day passed so quickly! It was a great, refreshing day to be out, and damn cosy can! Or I could be just high from the remnants of the day before. Had western food at a coffeeshop, before returning for some herbal soup. Changed my bedsheet happily after the dettol spray dried off. Was just starting on my news read-up when a spontaneous decision to watch Up in 3D was made, and I had to leave home again in a snap of fingers. UP IS SOOOOOOOOO GOOD! I will actually write about it separately(which means, spoilers, so please do not read if you have yet to watch it). I have never watched a 3D movie before so that explains the excitement! It was crowded when I got there, and I know there were some who were going to watch a certain local horror-comedy, which I have heard all the bad reviews of. I have not watched a single movie of said director (except the very first one) simply because of the reviews from friends, and I got tired reading of his own boasting efforts in the media, like the very recent one he blamed local media for writing what they want to anyhow-ly write, and he feels that despite what they wrote, he said the ?? is what matters, and he only cares that he had received only positive one so far. I have heard the movie’s best part is the NG at the end of the show. Maybe just that I am jealous, and people around me don’t know how to appreciate and we are the deluded ones, like the media writers. Anyway. Strangely, as I was thinking about that, when I headed to the washroom at the end of Up, the audience from the next cinema was out too. Someone was lowering his head and sticking close to the wall, looking a tad sneaky. I gave a slight glance and realised why. Talk about freaky coincidences. Oh dear, big director in da house, baybeh! That said, definitely must hide face, or else people might mob him and recognise him! His bunch of friends was walking towards him, and he eagerly asked, “How was it?” in mandarin. Part of me was wishing they would tell him the truth. He isn’t bad, just that, he needs to be humbled, somehow, and take constructive criticism in his stride, maybe. After all, it has been so many years… *** I drove around for a cool 40 minutes on Saturday. The last time I did it was in the compound of my place with a coach beside me, which ended up with me being horned by the car behind and I panicked, ran off the driver’s seat, and allowed the coach to take over, as I giggled endlessly. Something in me changed. I was actually more composed, and I surprised myself with the control I have over my nerves, and myself. Signalling, even doing point-turns out of a dead end I found myself driving into. I realised in the past, my self doubt was the cause of my fears behind the wheels, and my lack of confidence just made me feel that I can’t manage the road, and there was even fears that since I had only manual car experiences, I might be confused by auto cars. Strangely, this time, I don’t know how I managed to put everything aside, and realised, it was my self-doubt all these while that prevented me from going forward. In all senses of words. And that, was a big revelation. *** I had plans for Sunday. I went to sleep, knowing I want to replenish the sleep… I woke up too early in the afternoon, and had trouble keeping myself awake, and ended up heading back to sleep. When I woke up, it was too late to have a new style for my hair, and that the Da Vinci exhibition was finally over (someone told me not to waste the moolah cos it wasn’t worth it). It was dark, and it rained when I woke up. It was almost 7 in the evening. Sooooooo cosssssyyy soo much needed! Had some home-cooked beehoon, and couldn’t decided to watch the rally on channel 5, 8 or U(I know, sounds terribly silly). Ended up watching MotoGP and saw Valentino clinching the winning position after some drama in the last laps. Yay. And then, now, it is Manchester United V Birmingham playing as I start on the 5 pieces of blog entries I had meant to post up over the weekend. And I am onto my numero uno. I actually feel very fulfilled this weekend for all sorts of reasons. Maybe Minibean. Maybe the impulse purchase. Maybe just the simple joys. Maybe even the talk with the big boss though it might not turn out as positive as I would like it to be. Maybe the renewed hope. Maybe UP brought so much hope… Maybe, the figures are finally jumping. Maybe, I finally gotten enough rest. Maybe, there is finally some light. Maybe, the driving brought some inspiration. And maybe, many things don’t matter anymore Or it could be some good days. Very good days. I wish I could buy faith like this, when they run out sometimes. Such dreaminess to a weekend I adore. With remaining time for me to do a sum of the blessings I have received in the past week. If only, it is a little longer. Manbags I think I have a serious case of penis-envy. Why are manbags soooooo gorgeous and attractive?! But perhaps everything happens for a reason, that must be why I am not yet a bankrupt. I blame all of them. Warning though, it will trigger the shopping hormones, especially the bag-lust DNA in all females too.